Being a dad is stressing me out

[joker1979]

Just the fact that you are admitting you are stressed out and seeking advice makes you a great dad that cares about his daughter deeply. Kudos to you for still going to school! Your daughter will be super proud one day. Now down to the nitty gritty.. I have a 5 year old also and I actually think this age is great - no diapers to change, they are a lot more independant so you have alot of your time back, you can take them to more places - so Id say first, look at the positives! Two, you can be a strict parent and still be loving - you can look up the 3 parenting styles and you'll see that the one that kids respond to best is a strict parent that still shows love and pick his/ battles. I noticed with my son around this age that he is testing boundaries and so I too have had to get a little more strict. I have no problem with it because its part of being a parent and he still loves me the same. Just make sure to explain why youre doing what you are doing thats all. Kids are smart. I also recommend a reward system (we just started giving our son stars for good behavior and x's for bad behavior -- if he gets 20 stars, he gets to go to toys r us and pick out a small toy) - you have no idea how well he responded to this - he loves it!

[bluemonday]

If/when she won't eat vegetables, tell her how great they are for her and how EVERYONE loves them. Also, tell her you are making them special for her. You wouldn't believe the crap my Mom used to get us to eat by also telling us that! I hated brocolli, but asked my Mom for the "special baby trees just for kids" for years (which were brocolli and I totally fell for her crap, and by time I figured it out it was too late I was hooked). Be creative and fun with what you tell her. Expect that she will hate some things, but that her palate may change over time.

[mainebrokerman]

first of all,,,,hit the reset button and take a few minutes to yourself...
it isn't so bad,,

give yourself some credit for not abandoning your daughter as her mother did


here is a simple yet effective solution,,,i was a single dad too

give her choices....
but what she chooses she has to follow thru

don't worry about veggies,,,and whatever you do don't force her to eat veggies.... I haven't had many veggies for over 35 yrs because they were forced on me...as a kid,,,made it a test of wills

with my son,,,i gave him choice 1 2 and 3 they can be similar,,

don't sweat the small stuff,,,

I was overly attentive as a young dad,,, almost a perfectionist,,,,but learned to back off......again choices..and there are times you have to be more of a parent than popular,,

no sense in stating a boundary if you don't hold to it..


don't sweat the small stuff,,,the best gift you can give a child is confidence,,,,be a father a coach,,not a cop...

[luzianne]

Originally Posted by ProudParkie

My constant worry is, if I ask her to do something she doesn't want to do, will she hate me for it?


The last thing I want to have happen is for her to say I'm mean or that she hates me.

Oh, she will say you are mean. Just be prepared for it. But it's okay. My son once told me I was the worst mother in the whole entire world! Now that he's in his 20s, he doesn't feel that way.

[purehuman]

Originally Posted by ProudParkie

She knows all the little tricks to getting what she wants( I.E. wanting water when it's bedtime in order to stay up later or puppy dog sad eyes when she doesn't want to eat veggies). Sometimes I give in but other times I don't

Just remind yourself...she's only 5...you're 23. Who do you think is the smartest one?

Also, when you insist that she does things...even if she doesn't like it...she's not going to hate you for it.
I've met more children who wished their parents would set guide lines for them than kids who're angry because their parents did.

Kids NEED guidance...not discussion...you are the adult. you have final say...she'll respect you more if you take control.