Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I am a SAHM. I've had a few people ask me if they can drop their child off at my home while they work during the day. For free childcare. They seem surprised when I say no. They say that since I stay home all day, they thought it would be no problem for me to take their child. I have to explain that with 3 young kids, it's hard for me to babysit. And I don't stay home all day. I run errands, take kids to doctor/dentist/orthodontist/dance class, etc. I'm pretty busy.
I have a list of drop-in day care centers in our area, which I use myself whenever I get into a bind. I give them this info but they seem bummed about having to pay for daycare.
So I'm curious why people assume that SAHMs will provide free childcare? I know a "few" who babysit for extra money, but don't know any who babysit for free. Also, I stopped babysitting when I was in college.
Who ever these folks are they sound like they are very inconsiderate, especially given their come back when you say no.
If I were you, I'd assess who these people are, and avoid those types going forward.
When I was a SAHM, I never had anyone ask/expect me to watch their kids for free, but I did get many offers to watch them for pay. I did it twice, and both times I was gradually taken advantage of. Probably because tend to not to be more lax with friends than with a professional care provider. After that, I made it clear that I would only do limited, occasional babysitting, like if there was a delayed opening at school or an early dismissal, and I did put my neighbors kids on the school bus with mine for a couple of months while she was waiting for a spot to open in before-school care. I refused to accept payment.
It was funny though, how people’s kind of assumed, because I was “home anyway”, I was looking to take in daycare kids. Truthfully, I didn’t want the responsibility and hassle of watching other people’s kids, even if they paid me.
Now that I’m a working mom, I wouldn’t dream of asking unless it was a dire emerge and the person had offered in the past. Other than that, I keep my childcare arrangements strictly professional.
I think many people assume that SAHMs, retired people, and others who don't 9-5 have nothing better to do than fill whatever need they have.
My retired husband flew to California--2500 miles from home--to take care of his mom, after spending 3 months in Texas taking care of a sibling. His sister--living 30 minutes away from mom--said it made sense that he did it because he didn't have other responsibilities.
I've had this issue. I actually had a neighbor when my kids were little send out an email to a group of stay at home moms to sign up for a day of the week to watch her child in the summertime. No one responded.
This isn't a SAHM vs. working mom thing. I've been both a SAHM and a working mom. Some people are users and try to take advantage of others. It's just easier for them to do it if you stay at home. Some people are just rude.
Yes, I have been asked many times to watch others children at home when I wasn't working. I've even had it happen at school since I'm a teacher.
Happened to me, too, and I was guilted into caring for a three-year-old several days a week for a little over year. After that, I became a lot more protective of my time and much better at saying no.
I was at one point a SAHM for 5 years. During that time I did have neighbors ask me if I could watch their child for an hour or two if they were in a bind and I had no problem with that as I knew if I was ever in a bind I could call on them for a favor. I never had anyone ask me if I could consistently watch their child for free. That seems very odd to me and I can't believe someone would just assume that another person would agree to an arrangement like that. I did once have a mom who's child was friends with mine who would try to set up play dates, but she always would turn it around to make the playdate at my house instead of hers. She would then tell me that she had to run her other child to the doctor, dentist, etc and would leave her child at my house for 4 hours before picking her up when the playdate was supposed to be 2 hours. Ignoring my calls and texts. I put an end to having that child over real quick! It was obvious that the mom was just trying to use me for free child care.
I don't think this is common. It never happened to me when I was at home, and I only asked someone once right after I went back to work. I gave her a Starbucks card as a thank you.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
