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Just because you don't like it here, you can't possibly know if someone else will regret it or not.
As for uprooting a high-schooler, I have personal experience with both sides of this issue. My dad was USAF and so we moved every few years. We were stationed at DMAFB in Tucson when I was in 6th-9th grade. When it came time to move again I wasn't very happy about it, especially since 9th grade was the bottom rung on the HS ladder and when I got to my new HS in FL I discovered that it was a 3 year HS so 10th grade was on the bottom rung AGAIN! I was miserable for about a week, and then got over it. After a month or so I had new friends and everything was fine.
That was in the 70's.
Years later, when we realized we were fed up with Ohio winters (Ohio was where I 'landed' at the end of the USAF moves), we thought about relocating to AZ with the kids still in HS vs waiting for them to graduate. We waited til the last one graduated and were on the road 2 weeks later. He came with us, but moved back to Ohio shortly afterwards, because of his friends. (well, really a girl he had just met).
We would have preferred if the kids were settled near us, and if we had moved a few years earlier they would have been. But it is what it is- there is no perfect solution, you just have to weigh all the pros & cons and make the best decision you can.
As for this area of the country, I echo maverick's sentiments- it is gorgeous and I will take a few months of 100-110 in exchange for grilling out in January wearing flipflops and shorts!
Will you love it as Maverick & I do? Or will you despise it as foreverking does? Only you can determine that...
Everybody is different but I'm guessing if she is having issues with the gloomy weather up there AND they have a good opportunity to make more money, it's a no brainer to me. Cheaper costs of living here means even MORE money in their pocket.
Who knows if they will like it here. I love it here, you as well but some don't. I think the deciding factor is financial. If the money is that much better, it would benefit the family in the long term.
The 15 year old will adapt and more than likely, prosper. I know how life is in the PNW. For a good part of the year, you stay inside. Here, he will get out much more often and probably do more extra curricular activities that he couldn't do in Seattle.
That's my take on things.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scottay
That is what I've noticed as well. For the first few years the heat doesnt bother people much and they are just happy not to have to shovel their driveway in the winter. Then after living here for about 6 or 7 years they are sick of the oppressive nature of the summer heat and do nothing but complain about it.
On that note, I have noticed that Phoenix has a high turnover. Many people stay for 3 or 4 years then move on because of the heat, lack of culture that many other cities (including Seattle) have and other reasons.
Most people stay in their homes an average of 5 years or so. We are a very mobile society so saying that people in Arizona only stay 3 or 4 years is actually pretty typical of anywhere in the U.S.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran66
You're right -- her son shouldn't be the deciding factor, but he should be a big factor. Also, sometimes when we don't want to face our own concerns we project them onto someone else. I'm not saying OP is doing that; I'm saying it often happens. May OP has her own real fears but it's easier for her to think about and worry about her son.
Regardless, there is so much more to this than just whether or not her son will be happy.
I agree. He shouldn't be the deciding factor. If the OP is that afraid, if that's really what's going on here, then she just needs to make a decision one way or the other and live with it but she needs to be informed about the good and the bad so she can make an intelligent, educated choice.
Just because a 15 year old is getting squirly about a change that he doesn't agree with is no reason to kill an opportunity for the entire family. It's actually pretty selfish if you ask me.
Just because you don't like it here, you can't possibly know if someone else will regret it or not.
As for uprooting a high-schooler, I have personal experience with both sides of this issue. My dad was USAF and so we moved every few years. We were stationed at DMAFB in Tucson when I was in 6th-9th grade. When it came time to move again I wasn't very happy about it, especially since 9th grade was the bottom rung on the HS ladder and when I got to my new HS in FL I discovered that it was a 3 year HS so 10th grade was on the bottom rung AGAIN! I was miserable for about a week, and then got over it. After a month or so I had new friends and everything was fine.
That was in the 70's.
Years later, when we realized we were fed up with Ohio winters (Ohio was where I 'landed' at the end of the USAF moves), we thought about relocating to AZ with the kids still in HS vs waiting for them to graduate. We waited til the last one graduated and were on the road 2 weeks later. He came with us, but moved back to Ohio shortly afterwards, because of his friends. (well, really a girl he had just met).
We would have preferred if the kids were settled near us, and if we had moved a few years earlier they would have been. But it is what it is- there is no perfect solution, you just have to weigh all the pros & cons and make the best decision you can.
As for this area of the country, I echo maverick's sentiments- it is gorgeous and I will take a few months of 100-110 in exchange for grilling out in January wearing flipflops and shorts!
Will you love it as Maverick & I do? Or will you despise it as foreverking does? Only you can determine that...
Had I been from Ohio, I would have picked this place over Ohio also, as it looks like an absolutely miserable part of the country to me. However to compare the Pac NW and its soggy weather (which is why it is so beautiful) to the misery of the cold in Ohio is not comparing apples to oarnges. As far as grilling, you can do that anywhere 12 months out of the year.
Just because a 15 year old is getting squirly about a change that he doesn't agree with is no reason to kill an opportunity for the entire family. It's actually pretty selfish if you ask me.
First of all, we don't know that it's an 'opportunity'. It could be a big mistake. No -- including the OP -- knows that the move will turn out well. Secondly, 15-year-olds are selfish; it's called being a young teenager -- it's a normal phase. Thirdly, as I said before, OP may have her own fears, but is projecting them onto son. (Even if it's true -- and I am certain it is completely true -- that her son is not happy about this move, she can still be caught up in his fears to the neglect of her own concerns.) I know when I don't want to deal with my own 'stuff', I can get real caught up what is going on in The US -- and all over the world, for that matter.
OP has to make this decision. We can give her all the advice in the world -- but it's her and her husband's decision. After all, we are not making the move. Yes, I don't want her to move to AZ, but I've presented my reasons why -- as a number of people have -- both pros and cons -- and now it's up to OP. I think she and her husband should have talked this over with their clergy person or with a therapist who could facilitate their speaking openly about their pros and cons and not tell them what to do. In fact, that's not a bad idea at all.
A VERY tough decision. I agree that the OP sounds very tentative herself, so that is my main issue with it.
I've lived in Seattle (one of my daughters was born there) and we currently live in Phoenix. I understand people talk about the weather and jobs. But cities have their own vibe to them. You have to be honest with yourself and figure out what elements of a city are important to you. Seattle is gorgeous and very outdoorsy. It has a wonderful urban vibe and has very distinct neighborhoods with character. Phoenix has diverse neighborhoods (but the don't carry the same character that Wallingford, Phinny Ridge, Ballard, Bell Town have). However, if you're not an explorer and you don't care about distinct neighborhoods, then those differences will be lost on you (and aren't worth taking into account).
Same thing w/outdoor activities. If you aren't into the hiking thing, then that isn't going to be a plus for you.
Maybe make a list of each city's pros and cons, along with the elements you find most valuable.
As far as your son is concerned. Are you taking college into account? Would he want to go to UWA? If so, in-state tuition is certainly a plus. Same thing with ASU. If he's considering college out of those two states, then of course, it won't factor into your decision.
Personally, I would not make the move with one son left in high school. If he's the only one left at home, I'd just wait until he graduates. (A strong family support system is super important at his age. With your parents nearby and an established life, it may be rocking the boat too much.) You haven't indicated how much of an income boost the move will bring your family. Is your husband doubling his income?
Phoenix is quite beautiful but keep in mind there are many transplants here and people aren't terribly friendly. Do you make friends easily? Will you look forward to this fresh start?
Mavrick974: Today it is 92 degrees and rising: It will be over 90 degrees at least during the day from now until late October. I remember a few years ago cutting Halloween short because it was 8PM and it was 100 degrees outside (Gilbert AZ). My 8 year old was getting dehydrated. Yep should have brought water then, and always have since. Don't know why you are saying it does not stay in the 90s for 7 months here (during the day). Perhaps if you would have moved off that wet Oregon coast, you might have found more happiness. NOW, Im not trying to change your mind about Phoenix. That would be stupid, just trying to give the OP an opinion from someone who actually lived in Seatte.
A VERY tough decision. I agree that the OP sounds very tentative herself, so that is my main issue with it.
I've lived in Seattle (one of my daughters was born there) and we currently live in Phoenix. I understand people talk about the weather and jobs. But cities have their own vibe to them. You have to be honest with yourself and figure out what elements of a city are important to you. Seattle is gorgeous and very outdoorsy. It has a wonderful urban vibe and has very distinct neighborhoods with character. Phoenix has diverse neighborhoods (but the don't carry the same character that Wallingford, Phinny Ridge, Ballard, Bell Town have). However, if you're not an explorer and you don't care about distinct neighborhoods, then those differences will be lost on you (and aren't worth taking into account).
Same thing w/outdoor activities. If you aren't into the hiking thing, then that isn't going to be a plus for you.
Maybe make a list of each city's pros and cons, along with the elements you find most valuable.
As far as your son is concerned. Are you taking college into account? Would he want to go to UWA? If so, in-state tuition is certainly a plus. Same thing with ASU. If he's considering college out of those two states, then of course, it won't factor into your decision.
Personally, I would not make the move with one son left in high school. If he's the only one left at home, I'd just wait until he graduates. (A strong family support system is super important at his age. With your parents nearby and an established life, it may be rocking the boat too much.) You haven't indicated how much of an income boost the move will bring your family. Is your husband doubling his income?
Phoenix is quite beautiful but keep in mind there are many transplants here and people aren't terribly friendly. Do you make friends easily? Will you look forward to this fresh start?
Mavrick974: Today it is 92 degrees and rising: It will be over 90 degrees at least during the day from now until late October. I remember a few years ago cutting Halloween short because it was 8PM and it was 100 degrees outside (Gilbert AZ). My 8 year old was getting dehydrated. Yep should have brought water then, and always have since. Don't know why you are saying it does not stay in the 90s for 7 months here (during the day). Perhaps if you would have moved off that wet Oregon coast, you might have found more happiness. NOW, Im not trying to change your mind about Phoenix. That would be stupid, just trying to give the OP an opinion from someone who actually lived in Seatte.
It has NEVER been 100 on Halloween anywhere in the metro area and certainly not suburban Gilbert away from the heat island - NEVER. The average high on that day is 81. The record high is 96 and that was in 1988. You did not live here then. Over the many years I have lived here, we have found that we often leave home for T or T feeling hot and ending up bundled up in coats a couple hours later. It's a dry (and it cools off fast after sunset) kind of heat that time of year.
And it will be in the 80s next week and probably a couple more times before the late June heat sets in. It's bad enough without having to exaggerate it.
Some like the heat, some hate it, but most just soldier on through it. Survey after survey done in Phoenix finds that, far and away, the thing people mention as what they like the most about the place is ---- THE WEATHER.
Mavrick974: Today it is 92 degrees and rising: It will be over 90 degrees at least during the day from now until late October. I remember a few years ago cutting Halloween short because it was 8PM and it was 100 degrees outside (Gilbert AZ). My 8 year old was getting dehydrated. Yep should have brought water then, and always have since. Don't know why you are saying it does not stay in the 90s for 7 months here (during the day). Perhaps if you would have moved off that wet Oregon coast, you might have found more happiness. NOW, Im not trying to change your mind about Phoenix. That would be stupid, just trying to give the OP an opinion from someone who actually lived in Seatte.
I swear I'm not trying to be argumentative but let's AGAIN look at the facts.
Today is around 92 and so will tomorrow but apparently we have a little bit of a cooling affect coming.
And here we have the FACTS again. As Ponderosa so eloquently states below, it has NEVER been anywhere close to 100 on Halloween anywhere in the valley. The "record" high is 93 here in east Mesa/Apache Junction.
And I'm just trying to give the OP honest and accurate information in which to make an informed and intelligent decision. And this is coming from someone that had lived in the PNW for 23 years. I like it here, you don't. She might, she might not. Let's give her the correct information so she can decide if it's worth it.
The facts are that it is over 100 for almost exactly 3 months. It's not 115 all the time. It's not "well over 90 for 7 months". It's just not.
On average, it's 90 or above from May 9th until October 9th. That's 5 months, not 7. Frankly, if it's under 100 and the humidity is low, I personally don't think it's hot but others would disagree. I've been in 100 degrees in Oregon with 95% humidity and I thought I was going to die. It just isn't that way here.
Again, I'm not trying to be argumentative but I sure get weary of inaccurate information.
I'm sure the OP is a smart person so let's at least give her accurate information in which to make a very big, life altering decision.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa
It has NEVER been 100 on Halloween anywhere in the metro area and certainly not suburban Gilbert away from the heat island - NEVER. The average high on that day is 81. The record high is 96 and that was in 1988. You did not live here then. Over the many years I have lived here, we have found that we often leave home for T or T feeling hot and ending up bundled up in coats a couple hours later. It's a dry (and it cools off fast after sunset) kind of heat that time of year.
And it will be in the 80s next week and probably a couple more times before the late June heat sets in. It's bad enough without having to exaggerate it.
Some like the heat, some hate it, but most just soldier on through it. Survey after survey done in Phoenix finds that, far and away, the thing people mention as what they like the most about the place is ---- THE WEATHER.
Very well said.......
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