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Old 05-05-2013, 08:36 PM
 
Location: Maryland
18,630 posts, read 19,429,643 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by urbanlife78 View Post
For starters, not all single mothers are without the baby's father. The article makes no mention of that, so we just don't know. Also, how many of these single mothers are actually divorced mothers who married and had children young?

The article seems to talk only about single mothers, but does nothing to talk about the fathers of these children. I would say the best advice would be to push the education with girls when they are in school that the better the eduction they get, and waiting till marriage before having children, as well as teaching them about safe sex would decrease these numbers.
Why is it when folks offer a point the fact that not all people do this or that means a conclusion can't be drawn? Have people ever heard of statistics?
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:40 PM
 
24,488 posts, read 41,157,338 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Randomstudent View Post
Not really, I am almost certain you can apply that tactic to tax evaders, after all we have applied it really, really effectively to sex offenders and also quite effectively to people with criminal records generally. You can definitely apply it to dead beat dads and some states doing just that.

Pink and blue parking boots to greet deadbeat parents in Virginia | CJOnline.com

The problem is that men don't take responsibility and often don't face significant issues from it, in fact, it is generally seen as a + to have lots of sexual conquests.
But why is this only a major problem in certain states? I think it's more important to understand WHY and see if there's a more justified solution than to just award people scarlet letters.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:42 PM
 
Location: NC
9,984 posts, read 10,398,124 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NJBest View Post
The solution is not to blindly go after single parents. We need to understand why states like NC are so messed up that 26% of children there are living in poverty while states like NH, only 12% are living in poverty. If (big if) it's because NC has more births out of wedlock/relationship... why is that the case?

Children in poverty - Data Across States - KIDS COUNT Data Center
For North Carolina's case relative to New England and the Northeast I would suspect a lot of that has to deal with the fact that the south is under-developed relative to the North. The south also had Jim Crow until the 1960s, the point of which was to create a permanent underclass.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:42 PM
 
Location: Maryland
18,630 posts, read 19,429,643 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Randomstudent View Post
I think we as a society need to focus on a coordinated shaming of men who are absentee fathers, granted this would be hard to do outside the child support context, but I think it is necessary. Some of this is starting to happen, but we need more of it. If they have a car, force them to put a bumper sticker on it that says "I am a deadbeat dad," publish their names regularly, pound it in to the mindset of men in grade school, allow people to discriminate against them etc basically do to them what we have already effectively done to sex offenders. The problem as the article points out through its glaring omission of the sperm donors these single mothers had is that tomcats often get a free pass from societal pressure. If we are every going to make any progress on the issue of single motherhood that needs to change.
I agree societal pressure needs to be applied but because of biology the brutal truth is that pressure has to be applied towards women in order for it to work. All of these problems grew in number during the sexual revolution. Feminists hate this but there is a reason female sexuality was heavily controlled by most cultures throughout the world.

Hyper-sexualized, asexual America | RedState

Quote:
The answer can be found in the Left’s drive to hunt down and destroy all that remains of traditional sexual morality, because it’s a barrier to the proper relationship they envision between citizens and the State. The result is a hyper-sexualized but asexual world, in which the differences between men and women have been eliminated. This is a huge undertaking, so it’s important to get cracking when citizens are still young and impressionable.

The traditional understanding of sexual relations emphasizes the profound differences between men and women. They are not in any sense interchangeable. They have a unique need for one another, and different needs from society. The union of men and women is not seen as exclusively serving to produce and raise children, but child-rearing is exceedingly difficult without married men and women working together.

It seems like a laughable understatement to observe that pregnancy is one of the greatest differences between men and women. Technology and culture have alleviated most of the other life-shaping distinctions between the sexes. Male strength, for example, is obviously meaningful in professional sports or military endeavors, but it’s no longer a prerequisite for general career success or survival. Nevertheless, pregnancy remains the unique burden of women. That doesn’t mean it should be the unique responsibility of women.

This is the fundamental truth behind traditional sexual customs, which no amount of feminist social engineering has ever been able to erase. Pregnancy is the responsibility of both partners. It takes two people to make a baby, but only one of them has to carry it to term. The male partner in this endeavor often decides to walk away, leaving the woman alone to face childbirth and all that follows. Irresponsible men clearly see this as an attractive option.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:45 PM
 
11,768 posts, read 10,269,301 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Randomstudent View Post
I think we as a society need to focus on a coordinated shaming of men who are absentee fathers, granted this would be hard to do outside the child support context, but I think it is necessary. Some of this is starting to happen, but we need more of it. If they have a car, force them to put a bumper sticker on it that says "I am a deadbeat dad," publish their names regularly, pound it in to the mindset of men in grade school, allow people to discriminate against them etc basically do to them what we have already effectively done to sex offenders. The problem as the article points out through its glaring omission of the sperm donors these single mothers had is that tomcats often get a free pass from societal pressure. If we are every going to make any progress on the issue of single motherhood that needs to change.
Why don't we shame women that sleep with criminals or drug dealers? Why don't we shame women that get pregnant knowing the father won't be around? Why don't we shame women that get pregnant on purpose when they don't have a job? Why don't we shame women that sleep with poor men? If a man has a job he is paying child support either by choice or by force. 3 months without payment is going to result in suspended driver/occupational license, passport, and a stay in jail. However, that doesn't mean the mom won't be sucking on the state.

Women have the sole choice in deciding to become pregnant. Personally (from a dating perspective), I don't even like single mothers. The way I look at it is "I didn't F up my life, so don't come crawling to me because you did." I could care less if we were just talking about 40 yr old women, but 18 yr olds with kids?? No thanks!
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:45 PM
 
1,880 posts, read 2,310,559 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EdwardA View Post
Why is it when folks offer a point the fact that not all people do this or that means a conclusion can't be drawn? Have people ever heard of statistics?
Yes, which is why I linked to the actual original article and statistics that Joe Soucheray is talking about.

About 6 in 10 Recent Moms in Their Early 20s are Unmarried, Census Bureau Reports - American Community Survey (ACS) - Newsroom - U.S. Census Bureau

http://www.census.gov/prod/2013pubs/acs-21.pdf

So, ALL PEOPLE ON THIS THREAD should read the above links before commenting.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:46 PM
 
Location: Maryland
18,630 posts, read 19,429,643 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boner View Post
The feminist movement created most if not all the problems we are having with the destruction of the family and the all the social ills that came with it. The core issues of abortion and equal pay I have no problem with but the movement has run amok and women have created a social welfare system that is rife with waste fraud and abuse. To blame these problems on religious dogma is a simple (minded) cause and one so far off the mark its laughable . In fact it was the rejection of religious ideas that helped usher in the civil rights movement with all its good and the social problems destroying the family, our moral fabric and threatening to bankrubt the country


Lets use my wifes culture in the Philippine Islands to illustrate a comparison. If a young girl becomes pregnant there are no social programs she can turn to to bail her out. Her family is embarrased, her community scorns her and she alone is charged with the finaincial support of that child. Usually this young women will take a contract job overseas leaving the baby in the care of family. She will work as a domestic or in some factory for 6 days a week sending every penny she possibly can back home to support her child and the family that is now caring for that child. I might add that the PIs are a very Catholic society so your half baked non sense about some religious doctrine influencing our social problems is a short sighted and uninformed opinion. As we see in this example religion is one of the institutions supporting family values which is the only safety net available to a young un married mother


Now lets take the same scenario in the US. Entitled snot nosed immature little girl decides she doesnt like the rules in mom and dads house. She steps out and gets knocked up and just like in the PIs embarrases her family but thats where the similarities end. Instead of taking financial responsability the surrogate father known as the state steps in with an Apartment, Food stamps, WIC, full medical, SSI, and even day care or a pell grant if she has half an initiative to get off her lazy entitled arse and do something to change and get off the dole. We have actually created an environment where we incentivise single motherhood in the immature eyes of a 16 YO. I come from a small town in the mid west and I saw this happen over and again. The last welfare queen I saw in this situation had a 1/4 barrel on ice in her sink., couple fresh packs of Marlboros and asack of weed for her traditional Friday night get together.

We are obligated to take care of the children born into poverty and circumstances beyond their control. As I said I have no problem with the civil rights movement and the core issues it aimed to solve. The problem is the feminazis have lurched way to the left and is unrecognizable today as a mainstream ploitical movement. If you want proof of how sick our society is all you have to do is look at our broken social welfare system or family courts and the power our laws have put into the hands of this lobby
I don't even think families in America would be embarrassed anymore except for maybe the middle class and above. Remember we're not allowed to judge.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:48 PM
 
Location: Maryland
18,630 posts, read 19,429,643 times
Reputation: 6462
Quote:
Originally Posted by susankate View Post
Yes, which is why I linked to the actual original article and statistics that Joe Soucheray is talking about.

About 6 in 10 Recent Moms in Their Early 20s are Unmarried, Census Bureau Reports - American Community Survey (ACS) - Newsroom - U.S. Census Bureau

http://www.census.gov/prod/2013pubs/acs-21.pdf

So, ALL PEOPLE ON THIS THREAD should read the above links before commenting.
Ok I read it. What point are you trying to convey?
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:48 PM
 
Location: NC
9,984 posts, read 10,398,124 times
Reputation: 3086
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdwardA View Post
I agree societal pressure needs to be applied but because of biology the brutal truth is that pressure has to be applied towards women in order for it to work. All of these problems grew in number during the sexual revolution. Feminists hate this but there is a reason female sexuality was heavily controlled by most cultures throughout the world.

Hyper-sexualized, asexual America | RedState
Before feminism and female sexuality it was worse. This was because it was even more one sided in that men were event more encouraged to try and get as much sex as possible and women were viewed as sluts and bore all the blame if they gave in.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:50 PM
 
24,488 posts, read 41,157,338 times
Reputation: 12921
Quote:
Originally Posted by Randomstudent View Post
For North Carolina's case relative to New England and the Northeast I would suspect a lot of that has to deal with the fact that the south is under-developed relative to the North. The south also had Jim Crow until the 1960s, the point of which was to create a permanent underclass.
It's not just the Northeast. But, now we're getting somewhere. Discussing the root of the problem.
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