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Again, you are "assuming "that the man was reasonable, fair, and respectful. Dependence gives the depended upon power and as I've said it can and will be abused. And what you consider to be reasonable, fair and respectful can be very different from another.
I have an uncle with your mentality, ... a man from that era who thinks women, are second class who doesn't have a right her to opinions, feelings etc, and who believes a woman's purpose is to procreate, serve and obey the man. Do you think a woman who's married to a man like that is happy? Of course the man wouldn't care if she is or isn't. Everyone laughs AT my uncle and thinks knows him to be a pathetic little man who in his mind by the mear fact he is a man he believes he is superior. Men like you and him are the very reason women want to work outside the home, so they don't get under the thumb of men like this. By the way, uncle's is a lonely old man who no one wants to be around.
Well you are assume working away from home your boss is reasonable, fair and respectful. You are assuming wives are reasonable, fair and respectful.
I'm not assuming anything really, but taking the view that I don't want government meddling socially and with employment, marriage and divorce laws that aren't so equal as claimed.
Divorce laws were vastly more unequal in the 50s and 60s. The majority of women received spousal support sometimes for life. When women went to work in larger numbers in the 70s, that began to change. Now only 15% of divorces include a spousal support payment and most of those for only a few years so the lower earning spouse has time for retraining or education. And of those 15%, 5% are men receiving support from their ex wives.
That would also be my dad, born in 1921. He thought he deserved to be waited on hand and foot and my mother, who came from a family of immigrants, did it because she didn't realize this wasn't normal. For example, she would get up at 5:30 a.m. during the week to pour his cereal in the bowl and the milk on top of it, pour his orange juice in the glass, cut his grapefruit in half, sprinkle it with sugar, and halve a maraschino cherry and place it in the center. No, he wasn't going off to toil in the fields or in a factory, he had a low-stress white collar job promoting safety strategies for his company. And the opportunity to travel all over the world on the company dime. I still don't understand why he wasn't ashamed to be treated like a man-baby. Perhaps because he was an only child doted on by his own mother, who referred to him, even as an adult, as Sonny Boy.
My mother (now 98) likes to reminisce about the good old days. The good old days for her were the 1940s, when she worked, had her own money, traveled, played the field, and had a variety of people to talk to every day. Unlike my MIL, who was reasonably happy in the role while her kids were young, my mother wasn't cut out to be a SAHM and was a self-described nervous wreck until we kids were nearly out of the house. My dad wouldn't "let" her work. We kid were born late in their lives, so by the time we were all out of the house, my dad had retired and they wanted to travel, so she never worked again.
Quote:
Originally Posted by petch751
I have an uncle with your mentality, ... a man from that era who thinks women, are second class who doesn't have a right her to opinions, feelings etc, and who believes a woman's purpose is to procreate, serve and obey the man. Do you think a woman who's married to a man like that is happy? Of course the man wouldn't care if she is or isn't. Everyone laughs AT my uncle and thinks knows him to be a pathetic little man who in his mind by the mear fact he is a man he believes he is superior. Men like you and him are the very reason women want to work outside the home, so they don't get under the thumb of men like this. By the way, uncle's is a lonely old man who no one wants to be around.
Actually liberal politicians, media and the people who believe them when they say women on the right align themselves with men who believe them to be inferior. Telling us how we think is no better than a man baby who tries to tell us how we think.
That would also be my dad, born in 1921. He thought he deserved to be waited on hand and foot and my mother, who came from a family of immigrants, did it because she didn't realize this wasn't normal. For example, she would get up at 5:30 a.m. during the week to pour his cereal in the bowl and the milk on top of it, pour his orange juice in the glass, cut his grapefruit in half, sprinkle it with sugar, and halve a maraschino cherry and place it in the center. No, he wasn't going off to toil in the fields or in a factory, he had a low-stress white collar job promoting safety strategies for his company. And the opportunity to travel all over the world on the company dime. I still don't understand why he wasn't ashamed to be treated like a man-baby. Perhaps because he was an only child doted on by his own mother, who referred to him, even as an adult, as Sonny Boy.
My mother (now 98) likes to reminisce about the good old days. The good old days for her were the 1940s, when she worked, had her own money, traveled, played the field, and had a variety of people to talk to every day. Unlike my MIL, who was reasonably happy in the role while her kids were young, my mother wasn't cut out to be a SAHM and was a self-described nervous wreck until we kids were nearly out of the house. My dad wouldn't "let" her work. We kid were born late in their lives, so by the time we were all out of the house, my dad had retired and they wanted to travel, so she never worked again.
CatHerder man baby is actually the perfect way to describe these types.
All I can say is thank God I wasn't an adult woman in those days. Mama's raised a bunch of mama boys and man babies back then.
The difference the men and society didn't act like leaving your family was some noble thing and a desirable social movement the way feminist did when women did it.
Why would men leave a situation where a wife stepped in and took care of him like his mama did, someone waiting on him plus other benefits and he could also go out and play with other women (also common).
Seriously, there is nothing better than a marriage where both work as a team, bringing home money and sharing household responsibilities. No one likes to be taken advantage of and men or women who think it's ok for the other to carry most if not all of the responsibility at home especially when both work makes for an unhappy marriage. It is true even if the other is not saying so because they realize that their opinion or feelings don't matter. One may be getting away with it for right not but the other taking action is just a matter of time.
I think it's a good thing that there are now options, including men being the stay-at-home partner, as is the case with a co-worker's husband. Thinking, as some still do, that ALL women should do one thing is very limiting and doesn't account for different skills and temperaments.
When I was in grade school in the '60s, for example, it was pretty apparent which teachers were in that occupation because it was one of the very few open to them. Just out of college, I went to an organizational meeting in which women in their 50s and older predominated. I naively said to one of them that it was remarkable how many of them were schoolteachers. She replied, acidly, "Well, it's not like we had many options, back then."
So, for those who think we should turn back the clock to when women were "happier," I'd say forcing people of either gender into one lifestyle and harkening back to an era of often-stifling limitations, is not a recipe for happiness. Remember when just about the only occupations open to African-Americans were schoolteacher (in black schools only) and custodian? When I read in the newspapers about increases in black-on-black violence in some cities, I don't hear anyone saying African-Americans would be happier if just we returned to the days when Negroes "knew their place."
I have always worked outside the home, although I was lucky to be able to afford to work part time until my son was 4 or so.
The one concern with either men or women staying home is the loss of job experience and earning potential. Marriage will end either via death or divorce and many times there is not enough left to support a spouse who has been out of the workforce for 30 or 40 years. If it works for a couple, more power to them.
Apparently you know best. Sounds kind of judgmental against couples who choose for one spouse to stay home with the kids.
Yep it does, but it's not unusual for feminists to be know-it-alls, judgmental, biased, prejudiced and intolerant. Just look at some of their posts in this thread lol.
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