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No point both parents working full-time if one parent is making enough dollars already.
Children shouldn't be raised by a nanny, if it can be avoided.
Shouldn't,why not?
Kids are shuffled off to school at age 5 and raised by teachers. Often earlier than that if they attend preK.
Idon't think a parent being with them 24/7 for the first 4-5 years of their life compared to being with a parent 18 hours a day plus weekend and having interactions and constant stimulation for 8-9 hours a day with others is the only way.
according to an article by the bureau of labor most recent study shows SAHMs spend a total of 7 hours per week more on caring for children then do working mothers.
Again the SAHM helicopter parent is a relatively new phenomenon. Children have been left with relatives, tribe members, servants, slaves, siblings for a good deal of our history while mothers worked at home or outside the home.
oh yea, the SAHM helicopter parent. My mom was a SAH and growing up we were given a lot of independence, which made for a great childhood. I was 1 of 3 girls and 20+ boys in the neighborhood I got to do a lot of "boy" things, ride motorcycle, snowmobile, down the rapids, play football, softball, baseball, bike trips, hated basketball, just hanging out on the front porch, no I wasn't being trained in the kitchen. I didn't have parents hanging over me, they were interested and did spend time with us and I never felt neglected, my parents said they wanted us kids to be kids. Helicopter parent seem to live life through their kids rather than having a life of their own and allowing their kids to experience things bumps and all.
oh yea, the SAHM helicopter parent. My mom was a SAH and growing up we were given a lot of independence, which made for a great childhood. I was 1 of 3 girls and 20+ boys in the neighborhood I got to do a lot of "boy" things, ride motorcycle, snowmobile, down the rapids, play football, softball, baseball, bike trips, hated basketball, just hanging out on the front porch, no I wasn't being trained in the kitchen. I didn't have parents hanging over me, they were interested and did spend time with us and I never felt neglected, my parents said they wanted us kids to be kids. Helicopter parent seem to live life through their kids rather than having a life of their own and allowing their kids to experience things bumps and all.
We had a lot of freedom back in the day. We were basically let out after breakfast, called in for lunch and by gosh better be in at dark or super which ever came first. In between we were mostly left to our own devices.
I had a SAHM and I am grateful for her. Our house was spotless, we had three home cooked meals a day but it wasn't like she spent every waking minute tending to our education and entertainment. She was busy cooking and cleaning and watching her stories.
I don't get the notion that kids must have mom and only mom all day to prepare their food, fix their boo boos and interact with them.
We had a lot of freedom back in the day. We were basically let out after breakfast, called in for lunch and by gosh better be in at dark or super which ever came first. In between we were mostly left to our own devices.
I had a SAHM and I am grateful for her. Our house was spotless, we had three home cooked meals a day but it wasn't like she spent every waking minute tending to our education and entertainment. She was busy cooking and cleaning and watching her stories.
I don't get the notion that kids must have mom and only mom all day to prepare their food, fix their boo boos and interact with them.
We were the same. Weekends, holidays, after school and summer we were turned out after breakfast and not allowed back in the house until the streetlights came on. We drank out of the hose if we were thirsty (which I believe now is akin to child abuse). My mom would make us lunch and leave in the carport for us. Didn't eat with us, just delivered lunch and went back inside. Neither of my parents were interested in spending time with us. They felt, as many did in those days (the fabulous 60s) that as long as their kids were fed and doing reasonably well in school that they were doing their jobs. If we ever cried, we got a stern talking to about not acting like babies and being quiet. Parenthood by benign neglect was definitely their style and if anyone had asked about the quality/quantity of time spent with their kids they would have had no clue why that even mattered.
Even though I worked after my youngest got to pre-school, I know I spent FAR more time with my kids than my mom ever thought about. She was inside, all day, by herself doing something I'm sure she felt was far more important than spending time with her offspring. I know other folks had involved parents, but whenever I talk to friends around my age (58) about their childhoods most are pretty similar to mine where their parents took "care" of them financially, but really didn't see the need or importance of much else.
I know other folks had involved parents, but whenever I talk to friends around my age (58) about their childhoods most are pretty similar to mine where their parents took "care" of them financially, but really didn't see the need or importance of much else.
Our childhoods could not have been different. My siblings and I are all in our 50s.
We did all kinds of things with our parents, daily. They coached our sports teams, took us skating, shot hoops, went swimming, and for bike rides. We went to the lake, water skied, picnicked, fished and hiked. They liked to explore so lots of Sundays would find all six of us in the old Chrysler just going for a drive to a nearby town to get ice cream. I liked to hang out in the kitchen with my mom when she cooked and ask her a million questions about the hows and whys of cooking and baking. My dad took my brothers golfing , and me to the theatre, based on our interests.
We had time to hang out and do our thing, my parents weren't helicoptery. They were just active people and liked to be with their kids.
Our childhoods could not have been different. My siblings and I are all in our 50s.
We did all kinds of things with our parents, daily. They coached our sports teams, took us skating, shot hoops, went swimming, and for bike rides. We went to the lake, water skied, picnicked, fished and hiked. They liked to explore so lots of Sundays would find all six of us in the old Chrysler just going for a drive to a nearby town to get ice cream. I liked to hang out in the kitchen with my mom when she cooked and ask her a million questions about the hows and whys of cooking and baking. My dad took my brothers golfing , and me to the theatre, based on our interests.
We had time to hang out and do our thing, my parents weren't helicoptery. They were just active people and liked to be with their kids.
And that has changed tremendously in the last decade. A lot of parents simply don't want to be with their own kids. It's really sad.
Feminism was just a cog in the redistribution of wealth. “The U.S. court system loves divorce / child support because it takes money from creators (men) and gives it to spenders (women). It's a very common statistic but women do like 80% of consumer spending in USA (and the 20% that the guys are doing is probably just houses / cars / electronics /INVESTMENTS. Women spend their money on crap). ”
Ok, I am no feminist, but I have been around for a lot of years, starting in the late 40s, so I have some opinions..........on both sides of the argument.
First of all, I think that women WERE treated like second class citizens sometimes, back then. Boys and men always had preferential treatment in the home, and women were not given the same opportunities in education and jobs as we men were. There is no denying those facts, and it was not right.
Now for the other side of the coin. Women were always the glue that kept the family on track and the kids were taught things like doing the right thing, honesty, loyalty, and civility by their moms. When we got home from school, mom was there to hug us and we had that rock to steer us in the right directions and make us feel loved and secure.
As women wanted more out of life, a lot of them abandoned that role and sometimes felt they needed to compete with men or be even better than men. Kids came home to notes on the refrigerator door, and a cold meal to heat up in the microwave.
Just like everything else in life, there are trade offs, and the stable family home that women once controlled has changed to where both parents work, and kids do not have those traditional male/female role models.
Is it better today than in 1950 ? I don't think so, and events like the school shooting point that out very vividly.
And that has changed tremendously in the last decade. A lot of parents simply don't want to be with their own kids. It's really sad.
I should add - they liked to be with us when they weren't at work. My dad was military, and my mom worked full time for the government from the time I was 5. They met in the military in the 50s.
Our childhoods could not have been different. My siblings and I are all in our 50s.
We did all kinds of things with our parents, daily. They coached our sports teams, took us skating, shot hoops, went swimming, and for bike rides. We went to the lake, water skied, picnicked, fished and hiked. They liked to explore so lots of Sundays would find all six of us in the old Chrysler just going for a drive to a nearby town to get ice cream. I liked to hang out in the kitchen with my mom when she cooked and ask her a million questions about the hows and whys of cooking and baking. My dad took my brothers golfing , and me to the theatre, based on our interests.
We had time to hang out and do our thing, my parents weren't helicoptery. They were just active people and liked to be with their kids.
We did things together too but not daily. We did things dad liked to do, fishing, hiking, camping, boating, picnics on weekends sometimes. Dad was always tired when he got home from work. It was eat supper and be quite so he could watch the news. We didn't do things daily with mom because she didn't have money and she was busy cleaning and cooking. Then again mom was 32 when I was born then had my brother at 40. I'm sure they were more active with my older sister as they were much younger when she was born.
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