Gay Couple Relocating to Portland, ME - HELP! (South Portland, Biddeford: best cities, rent)

[persiamotorman]

Hi,
i'm gay also. I live in central maine, and think portland has a nice vibe. There's no way I can tell you that you will like it, but I find it nice. There's this 'children of the corn" thing that i encounter in central maine more regularly than I'd care to. I've never had anything but a positive experience in Portland.
The other posters are right about Maine being genuine. I lived in California, and I wouldn't use the word genuine to describe the way people presented themselves. But I would say, people in Maine are extremely sensitive if you give a differing opinion sometimes more than some places I've lived. You move, and adjust to the differences wherever you go, and generally things will be fine.
good luck

Originally Posted by Chandler85

Hello,

I have been researching Portland for a while now and following the forum anonymously .

To start off I am a west coast native (Las Vegas, NV). My parents moved to a farm in NW Minnesota to retire when I was 16 and then @ 18 I moved to Minneapolis where I ave been for the last 5 years.
I have researched city after city for the last 3 years as I hate MN and I think Portland, ME might be the place for me.

First-
I hate Minnesota "nice" what crap - lol - here is my view about it "we'll be nice to your face and jerks behind your back". Now being from the west a person is either nice or not - how say what you feel. My family is originally from Brooklyn, NY and Pennsylvania. I am hoping that people in Portland are kind but not "minnesota nice"

Second-
The Winters - I like snow; being from Las Vegas it still amazes me. However I do not like the ridiculous cold as well as the never ending winter season. And the road conditions in Mpls are horrid, especially in winter.

Third-
Economy, I am a Customer Service Manager / Fine Dining Server (which ever is available at the time, lol). And my partner is a Casual Dining/Bar/ Bowling Alley Manager. Now I realize that Portland's economy is on the decline however will it really be that hard for me to find a restaurant job (especially during the tourist season) if necessary until I can find a more career oriented position? I have broke here for the last five years so I'm sure I can make Portland work.

Fourth-
This is what worries me most but how accepting is the city to GLBT persons? I saw some stats that show alot of gay couples and that's what we are (we have been together for 5 years). I also saw a few "gay" bars downtown so that gives me some comfort but what about gay coffee shops and other hangouts? Also someone asked this question on the forum before but are there any "gay" neighborhoods (I imagine that the east end, west end, and the back bay would be fine)?

Fifth
Love the idea of the ocean - but how are the beaches? Can you take weekend trips out in the islands easily?



Thank You,

Chandler

(btw I will be moving without visiting first)

[K-Luv]

Originally Posted by Chandler85

Road lines? We don't have those here either - the burbs do but not in the heart of the city.

And Ogunquit does look lovely but also spendy. I could only afford that if I were independently wealthy - which, sadly, i am not.

??? Minneapolis repaints the streets like every other year.

Ogunquit is small and doesn't offer much. It becomes completely swamped with tourists during the summer and is (almost) completely dead in the winter. Think Bayside or Stillwater (minus the prison and 1/2 the population).

[Chandler85]

that was when the city had money... They used to be decent but this past year the lines have been nonexistent on Nicollet (from Franklin to 50th) for example.

[Chandler85]

come to think of it back in Vegas they had those round reflectors every 2 feet instead of painted lines - OH how I miss those...

[K-Luv]

Originally Posted by Chandler85

come to think of it back in Vegas they had those round reflectors every 2 feet instead of painted lines - OH how I miss those...

Yeah, I miss those, too.

[mainesnowflake]

I really think you would like Portland. Portland has a lot to offer, great restaurants and well known for their art district as well as being big on diversity. Definately check it out. Welcome to Maine in advance.

[Chandler85]

Well thank you "snow" - Its getting closer and closer to the move date and I still have to find movers an apt, and a job :O scary but exciting - I can always wait tables!?!

[mainesnowflake]

Craigslist has a bunch of apartments listed in Portland and jobs too. My daughter said to check out Styxx, a dance club, when you get here!

[angelo129]

Originally Posted by Chandler85

Hello,

I have been researching Portland for a while now and following the forum anonymously .

Second-
The Winters - I like snow; being from Las Vegas it still amazes me. However I do not like the ridiculous cold as well as the never ending winter season. And the road conditions in Mpls are horrid, especially in winter.[/b][/i])

You will certainly not find the road conditions better in Maine, and if you think the cold in Mpls is "ridiculous" and the winter "never ending" you really won't notice any difference in Maine. It starts early, ends late (I've seen thick ice in JUNE) and there are pot holes that lead to other universes.

Originally Posted by Chandler85

Now I realize that Portland's economy is on the decline however will it really be that hard for me to find a restaurant job (especially during the tourist season) if necessary until I can find a more career oriented position? I have broke here for the last five years so I'm sure I can make Portland work.[/b][/i])

This belief, that's based on nothing at all, will get you into deep trouble. Minneapolis is a big city; Portland is more like a mid-sized town. The opportunities are definitely not thick on the ground. You seem to think you need only find a job during the tourist season. Rents are very expensive relative to income, and things close down during the winter in a way you can't imagine unless you've actually lived in Portland. Please don't be so sure you can "make Portland work" without ever having even been here. And please also keep in mind (as I learned the hard way) that forums like this don't really represent a cross section of people in a given place. Those who have come to grief, whatever the reason, aren't likely to show up on a forum like this, and there ARE a disproportionate number of rah-rah people whose beliefs just aren't realistic. The other thing I'd mention is that experiences are unique to the person - a given place may be ideally suited to one person, they may have great luck there, and absolutely deadly to another.

([i] I also saw a few "gay" bars downtown so that gives me some comfort but what about gay coffee shops and other hangouts? . . . gay neighborhoods

Again, Portland isn't a big enough city to have whole neighborhoods of gay people (or neighborhoods of ANY specific kind of people), or specifically gay coffee shops or hangouts. There aren't enough gay people in Portland to keep a restaurant going on that basis alone. Portland is a very small city. It's hard to keep ANYTHING in business, especially during the winter. The fact that you've even asked this question indicates to me that you have a wholly wrong idea of Portland, especially as to its size and diversity.

I don't want to put my foot down in the middle of your dreams, but I'd like to spare you what's happened to me more than once. There is no substitute for visiting a place you're considering moving to. And you really ought to visit in January to get even the beginning of an idea of what you're letting yourself in for. Come for a week and look at apartment rentals, if you can find any. I say these things only because I genuinely want your next move, wherever that is, to make you and your partner happy, and not present you with any awful surprises.

[lrfox]

angelo129,

I'd like to comment on your replies.

Weather: Yes, Portland gets more snow than Minneapolis. However, Minneapolis has, on average, much colder winters than Portland. If the OP can handle the cold in Minneapolis, they can handle the cold here.

Jobs: I agree, moving to ANY city without a job lined up, especially in these times, is a bad move. I would suggest having something in advance before committing to a move.

The Forum: I also agree that these forums aren't a good cross-section of people in an area. USUALLY, they tend to be pretty happy with where they are and very apt to promote their town or state. However, there are exceptions (you're clearly one of them, I tend to be another) and many of those people have contributed to this discussion. As members of this community the BEST thing we can do is provide people with the information we have at hand. We can't make decisions for people no matter how we feel about what they're doing (good or bad).

Portland's "Gay" Community: I agree with your feelings about Portland as feeling more like a medium or large town than a city. I think that often times, it's made out to be larger than it really is, PARTICULARLY in these forums. However, regardless of the size of the city, it has a relatively large (proportionately anyway) gay population. The gay community here is active and very visible. Portland is a progressive little town. It may not have the amenities the bigger cities have, but the OP has done nothing to insinuate that they EXPECT Portland to have a big city style community. If they're looking for a strong gay community, it can be found in Portland. Heck, Provincetown Mass, Burlington Vt, Key West, Northamtpon MA, and others are MUCH smaller but are well known as havens for the gay community. While Portland may not have entirely gay neighborhoods or many gay restaurants (that I know of, anyway, but some are very popular among the gay community), it DOES have a strong gay community.