Gay lifestyle as an alternative to dealing with Women (generation, parent, girls)
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When did gay people get a lifestyle? I always thought they had a life, just like non-gay people.
IMO "lifestyle" is used by those to make it seem like a choice, when in reality it is not. I know lots of gays and lesbians and cannot name one who says it is a choice.
Yes. Possibly in a few cases, kids are abused and their sexual orientation is affected by this. (I base this on a letter I read in a newspaper years ago. I have no firsthand knowledge of this. Perhaps someone on this forum has better knowledge.) Mostly though, gay people feel attraction to people of the same sex. There are various physical reasons for this. At least that is the current thinking.
But some people are bisexual. Perhaps for them there is an element of choice. But I don't think they would consider themselves gay.
I'm sure, of course, that genetics/DNA may predispose some/to homosexuality, but assuming it is a lifestyle choice for others, to what extent do you believe it could be a result of their failed efforts or inability to connect with women romantically or intimately, or at least partly due to it. Like my friend, he said that he was exposed to porn at adult video stores (arcades) at a very young age and that exposure turned him off to being attracted woman ever since.
Unless it was some seriously traumatic porn, it sounds like your buddy has always been gay!
Can I offer my .2 cents?
I don't like seeing other men's penis. I don't want to kiss them. But such is society...such is society...that I once started "dating"(strictly in front of society-holding hands only) a very feminine looking guy and......
got female attention.
I am not lying. In fact this dude, who happens to be surrounded by women(he is gorgeous and has girls adding him on facebook randomly) told me "Rishi, pretend you are in a gay relationship with me. Just be free, laugh, enjoy yourself and see the wonder unfold". And it did. Women were sticking around me left right.
One would ask " So, how come you are gay and touching my tooshie", and I'd say "I don't see anatomy, I see passion". And look into her eyes. Almost got her to bed(breast fondling accomplished).
This is the lesson learned. Women are nuts. And in society they are fickle and easily swayed.
Besides, I genuinely had a great time with this guy...sexuality is complex and straight men have too much pressure.
I know a guy who had a series of failed relationships with women, and he's now with a guy. So apparently it does happen. But I think it's rare.
Did you ever consider the relationships may have failed because he was GAY?!
Lots of gay guys, (myself included) start our sex lives dating and sometimes having sex with women because we are TRYING to convince ourselves we aren't gay. Obviously these relationships are neither fair to us or the women we date. Luckily these days, as being gay has become more acceptable, it's easier for younger guys to admit who they are and avoid this sort of thing.
Also, I don't believe I chose to be gay. It is just the hand I was dealt, and I'm happy with it. However, even if it were 100% choice, who cares? Why can't an adult choose who they want to have a consensual relationship with? For some reason; bigots and the super right seem to think we are somehow evil if this is what we "chose"
So I've always been curious about this issue and wanted to get some feedback from others. I have an old friend (30years) who is gay and he once told me that he believes that homosexuality is lifestyle choice for many in the GLBT community. I'm sure, of course, that genetics/DNA may predispose some/to homosexuality, but assuming it is a lifestyle choice for others, to what extent do you believe it could be a result of their failed efforts or inability to connect with women romantically or intimately, or at least partly due to it. Like my friend, he said that he was exposed to porn at adult video stores (arcades) at a very young age and that exposure turned him off to being attracted woman ever since. So, it is possible that many men's lack of obtaining girlfriends, getting laid, or have no/limited romantic and intimate experience encourages them to accept homosexuality as a socially acceptable alternative lifestyle to satisfy their basic human need for intimacy???
This is a serious question, particularly with the recent social acceptance of a GBLT community, is it acceptable for guys to consider the gay/bi lifestyle if they can't or don't want to deal with the issues of rejection, approach anxiety, forever friendzoned, etc. that comes with modern dating hazards??? Like many here on this forum seeking answers to they lonely hearts?
And, FYI, I had a couple of homosexual experiences in my early 20s but it was just experimental and that experience helped confirm my hetero sexual preference and have never had any interest in gay encounters since. Just in case you thought I was trolling...
Thoughts??
Not politically correct to say, but thats pretty much what I have noticed. Lesbians I have known were exactly that same way. They were typical teenage girls looking for relationships with boys. But having difficulty relating to males, and maintaing relationships. After having a string of bad relationships, one night stands, and just generally getting screwed over by guys, and having difficulty finding compatible partners, they got fed up with it.
By then they are in their late teens / early 20s, and have a large circle of female friends, many of whom are in the exact same predicament. They start experimenting with each other, and then realize, hey this is OK, they don't need guys. Next thing they are having a big "coming out" party.
I suppose some people are born with a homosexual preference, but I suspect that for the vast majority it's just a matter of convenience.
BTW my personal opinion is that homosexuality is not natural. But if thats what makes you happy, go for it. It's sure doesn't bother me, what other people do. But I do think that its a mental issue, relating to an inability to interact with the opposite gender.
So I've always been curious about this issue and wanted to get some feedback from others. I have an old friend (30years) who is gay and he once told me that he believes that homosexuality is lifestyle choice for many in the GLBT community. I'm sure, of course, that genetics/DNA may predispose some/to homosexuality, but assuming it is a lifestyle choice for others, to what extent do you believe it could be a result of their failed efforts or inability to connect with women romantically or intimately, or at least partly due to it. Like my friend, he said that he was exposed to porn at adult video stores (arcades) at a very young age and that exposure turned him off to being attracted woman ever since. So, it is possible that many men's lack of obtaining girlfriends, getting laid, or have no/limited romantic and intimate experience encourages them to accept homosexuality as a socially acceptable alternative lifestyle to satisfy their basic human need for intimacy???
This is a serious question, particularly with the recent social acceptance of a GBLT community, is it acceptable for guys to consider the gay/bi lifestyle if they can't or don't want to deal with the issues of rejection, approach anxiety, forever friendzoned, etc. that comes with modern dating hazards??? Like many here on this forum seeking answers to they lonely hearts?
And, FYI, I had a couple of homosexual experiences in my early 20s but it was just experimental and that experience helped confirm my hetero sexual preference and have never had any interest in gay encounters since. Just in case you thought I was trolling...
Thoughts??
I don't think it works like that LOL
At least not for men anyways. Regardless of how bad a guys dating life is, nobody wakes up one day and becomes a homosexual unless they were in the closet. One is either attracted to the same sex or not.
Not politically correct to say, but thats pretty much what I have noticed. Lesbians I have known were exactly that same way. They were typical teenage girls looking for relationships with boys. But having difficulty relating to males, and maintaing relationships. After having a string of bad relationships, one night stands, and just generally getting screwed over by guys, and having difficulty finding compatible partners, they got fed up with it.
By then they are in their late teens / early 20s, and have a large circle of female friends, many of whom are in the exact same predicament. They start experimenting with each other, and then realize, hey this is OK, they don't need guys. Next thing they are having a big "coming out" party.
I suppose some people are born with a homosexual preference, but I suspect that for the vast majority it's just a matter of convenience.
BTW my personal opinion is that homosexuality is not natural. But if thats what makes you happy, go for it. It's sure doesn't bother me, what other people do. But I do think that its a mental issue, relating to an inability to interact with the opposite gender.
Sorry, but every person is unique and regardless of their sexual orientation we all have varying levels of social skills with other people. We all know the straight guy who can't interact with women if his life depended on it. Does it turn him gay? I don't think so. Many gays are better at interacting with women than men because they are less judgemental typically. Does it turn us straight because other men are mean/cruel to us? No.
...and you have a mental issue that does not allow for you to think like a logical human being.
I know a guy who had a series of failed relationships with women, and he's now with a guy. So apparently it does happen. But I think it's rare.
Your friend's difficulties with women may well have been due to the fact that he was gay and chose to deny it. A customer of mine who is gay said that often a young gay man can function in "dual mode" due to high levels of testosterone, but will prefer men. As he ages and testosterone levels drop he will lose interest in women and prefer men exclusively.
Your friend's difficulties with women may well have been due to the fact that he was gay and chose to deny it. A customer of mine who is gay said that often a young gay man can function in "dual mode" due to high levels of testosterone, but will prefer men. As he ages and testosterone levels drop he will lose interest in women and prefer men exclusively.
exactly. When people ask me how I was able to sexually function with women as a teenager I always tell them, "you're not attracted to your right hand are you?" For me being gay is more about the emotional connection you have with the person you love, and the physical attraction part is a little less important. But I am definitely not physically attracted to women.
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