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Anyone ever had therapy or counselling and it actually helped you? I was thinking about trying it, but I would like to hear some good experiences some have had with therapy.
How did it make you feel, how long before you could start to see improvement, etc
My mother had therapy, and she loved it and said it helped alot. So what are some other success stories?
Anyone ever had therapy or counselling and it actually helped you? I was thinking about trying it, but I would like to hear some good experiences some have had with therapy.
How did it make you feel, how long before you could start to see improvement, etc
My mother had therapy, and she loved it and said it helped alot. So what are some other success stories?
I've gone to several therapists. Some of them worked very well to make me feel better short term and be happier long term by giving me strategies that I could put in place to deal in a practical manner with long-term depression and anxiety issues.
The main thing to remember is that therapists vary in quality just as much as any professional. You wouldn't keep going to a hairdresser who did a bad job, or who made you feel uncomfortable, so don't feel you need to keep going to a therapist you don't click with. Don't be hesitant to quit a therapist if you don't seem to be connecting after two or three sessions. You need to feel comfortable with the therapist's viewpoint and methods in order to be able to trust the process enough to make changes in your life and outlook.
For me, behavioral therapy and something a bit esoteric called Hakomi therapy have worked the best to help me to make lasting changes that have made me happier and more productive. It took a while until I understood what type of therapy worked best for me, so if one type of therapy doesn't seem to help, I highly recommend trying a different practitioner with a different approach. The type of approach where I sat and moaned about how my dad was an alcoholic and my mom didn't love me did nothing but make me more depressed, whereas the type where I was asked to do specific actions worked very well.
If you feel at all disrespected or not heard, do not go back to that person. I once sat for 50 minutes describing in detail my situation, family background, marriage, and issues with depression and anxiety (the main reason I came in), only to have the therapist sit back and say, "Okay, now when are you going to do something about your weight?" Needless to say, I did not go back.
I also recently went to a therapist who didn't seem to have anything of her own to say, she just kept giving me printouts from a book to read. She also kept reading to me at length out of various books she would pull off her shelf. I drew the line when she sent printouts home with me that didn't even pertain to my situation, and wanted me to read them and report back to her. During the second session I asked her what type of a therapist she was and what her theory of therapy was. She said, "Oh, you know, you just talk about whatever you want to talk about, and I listen." After about five sessions, she had no suggestions on how to make my situation better, she just kept giving me printouts to read. They weren't even her own writing, they came directly from some book. I gave up on her after that.
Even considering the duds, I highly recommend therapy. It truly has helped me. I wish you luck in finding a good therapist.
I've gone to several therapists. Some of them worked very well to make me feel better short term and be happier long term by giving me strategies that I could put in place to deal in a practical manner with long-term depression and anxiety issues.
The main thing to remember is that therapists vary in quality just as much as any professional. You wouldn't keep going to a hairdresser who did a bad job, or who made you feel uncomfortable, so don't feel you need to keep going to a therapist you don't click with. Don't be hesitant to quit a therapist if you don't seem to be connecting after two or three sessions. You need to feel comfortable with the therapist's viewpoint and methods in order to be able to trust the process enough to make changes in your life and outlook.
For me, behavioral therapy and something a bit esoteric called Hakomi therapy have worked the best to help me to make lasting changes that have made me happier and more productive. It took a while until I understood what type of therapy worked best for me, so if one type of therapy doesn't seem to help, I highly recommend trying a different practitioner with a different approach. The type of approach where I sat and moaned about how my dad was an alcoholic and my mom didn't love me did nothing but make me more depressed, whereas the type where I was asked to do specific actions worked very well.
If you feel at all disrespected or not heard, do not go back to that person. I once sat for 50 minutes describing in detail my situation, family background, marriage, and issues with depression and anxiety (the main reason I came in), only to have the therapist sit back and say, "Okay, now when are you going to do something about your weight?" Needless to say, I did not go back.
I also recently went to a therapist who didn't seem to have anything of her own to say, she just kept giving me printouts from a book to read. She also kept reading to me at length out of various books she would pull off her shelf. I drew the line when she sent printouts home with me that didn't even pertain to my situation, and wanted me to read them and report back to her. During the second session I asked her what type of a therapist she was and what her theory of therapy was. She said, "Oh, you know, you just talk about whatever you want to talk about, and I listen." After about five sessions, she had no suggestions on how to make my situation better, she just kept giving me printouts to read. They weren't even her own writing, they came directly from some book. I gave up on her after that.
Even considering the duds, I highly recommend therapy. It truly has helped me. I wish you luck in finding a good therapist.
My mother was going to help. She already had one in mind when I told her. Says the therapist is a good one. Though I did tell her I preferred a woman therapist.
I hear some who say therapy did nothing, other than waste money. And I hear some recommend it, but they never go into detail regarding it. And yeah, some therapists are quacks. So it is good to get one you feel is good. I would someone professional, but not intimidating. I don't want Lilith of Cheers. lol Someone a bit more open and inviting is preferred.
You have to go in with the idea that the therapist is not going to cure you. It doesn't work that way.
We find healing via the process of therapy. YOU have to be open to changing yourself and changing how you think about your problems, family, people, or whatever is causing you distress.
The pain and conflict resides in your mind and a therapist can't crawl inside your head. A therapist can only guide you in the truths and ideas that will lead to positive mental and emotional changes. You have to be willing to change how you see yourself and your situation.
I've been to therapy and I highly recommend it. You may want to interview potential therapists and ask them about the approach they use. Are they Freudian, Jungian, CBT, do they offer EMDR, etc. Do some research on the various approaches.
A lot of people think therapy doesn't work because they are therapy resistant. They refuse to change their mind or their thought processes. They refuse to let go of blame. They refuse to confront painful truths. All the while, they expect the therapist to put some magic inside their heads. When that doesn't happen, they say therapy doesn't work.
This is so TOTALLY up to you. YOU decide when you let it go and no longer think about it. Sometimes, you REALLY need to move to get relief from all the little stressors/run-ins with the old life that get you down or defamation caused by whatever, and just let it go.
I would recommend you take the steps necessary to feel safe, then give up worrying about this so you can control your anxiety. I would not discuss getting any counseling, any time off work or whatever is causing your stress publicly, you will be able to leave things behind easier.
Some quality of therapy is so bad it is detrimental. If you are EVER confronted by a sarcastic care worker or worse, understand this can happen. This can be VERY detrimental to anyone in therapy. You need to leave appointment quietly and not make another appointment, if you get confrontational, the psych doctor can order you to be locked up at your own expense in mental hospital.
Bearing this in mind, this is worst case scenario, but you need to know the defense if you ever encounter something wrong. Some cities have some REALLY badly trained care.
You may find most comfort in your own reading from self help books and work steps in there. Art projects to express your feelings and act of putting this away can help when you are ready.
I've had at least 5 therapists and many other pdocs.
Out of the 5, I would only recommend 2. There is Soooo much variation in skill in this area.
I like the hairdresser analogy. Some really help to improve your self/look, others are less skilled and/or might just have one style that doesn't work for everyone.
As everyone above said, it takes work from the patient.
If after 3 sessions you don't feel comfortable/connected/optimistic, find a new therapist.
I would recommend after one session with the therapist: if you don't feel a connection, walk.
I've been on both sides of the chair. No one grows up in a perfect life and many times, in the process of healing, you are brought back to a place of need. I've been in therapy several times in life, and have consulted for the benefit of family members. There are a lot of dynamic persons out there (willing to help and facilitate the process of healing by working actively) and a small number of persons willing to engage you for a paycheck. The opportunities I have had were enriching. There were issues of self-doubt and capacity, from feeling alienated in a family of low education persons (I was the only one in the same generation of maternal and paternal relatives who completed a doctoral program and was degreed) to being abused interpersonally (I chose bad in my first relationship and was subjected to violence - yes, female against male violence). My sessions lasted between 2 years to 5 years, attending weekly, every two weeks, sometimes twice a week, and monthly until termination.
Find someone you can trust, find someone who will push you, and find someone with whom you will be able to tolerate psychological discomfort. You don't need degree as much as you need a good professional. I've met doctors who couldn't do poop and I've met LPC's who were masters of their art. As I told one potential client, 'this isn't a philosophy session and this isn't a smorgasbord of identified needs. If you have an issue, put it out there. If not, don't return because we aren't going to rehash history to find your needs. There are many people who are suffering and I don't want you taking up their space if you don't have an issue.' It was a brutally direct, honest statement, but I'm not there to play tennis. I also had a person say I read minds. We got to the heart of things really quickly on that. I returned the focus back on them and we began critical work on their needs, not imagined ideas of what I would do. We only work with what one brings to the table. If there is nothing on the table, get up and leave. A shrink is not psychic.
I should add to what was stated: we work towards healthier places, not full healing. If you feel fully healed, I'm your best cheerleader, but we take maladaptation and make it adaptable. Speaking analogously, I can't fix a broken bicycle rim, but I can put air in the tire and 'true' up the spokes so the wheel rides with less wobble and less eccentricity. To do more or expect more would seriously alter personality, and while many can suggest they do the same, it takes years of work and great willingness.
I wish you best in your search for a good healer and towards holism.
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