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They might not be necessarily unsolicited, though. There is a lot of pressure on these young women to prove that they're cool, they're down, they're not prudes, even if they are hesitant. They want to fit in.
I agree that peer pressure can be horrific.
That does not mean the boys have asked for this either.
I am more concerned about the long term effects of this behavior. If every boy in a highschool class has a copy of every girl's nude and/or masturbating videos, that must have an effect on the dating pool among young adults.
Quote:
Originally Posted by elyn02
Why might young women do that? My guess is a lack of experience in meaningful relationships - what it might look like, feel like.
Their moral compass is the community of 20-something influencers.
That does not mean the boys have asked for this either.
I am more concerned about the long term effects of this behavior. If every boy in a highschool class has a copy of every girl's nude and/or masturbating videos, that must have an effect on the dating pool among young adults.
Their moral compass is the community of 20-something influencers.
I doubt EVERY boy in the school has a nude of EVERY girl in the school. If so, it must be a pretty small school.
I also have to question the wisdom in blaming influencers. Are these kids all orphans who never had parents to instill some kind of self-respect in them from the time they were small? Adolescents will rebel, but the ones who had parents or guardians who were decent role models won't do it that way. I think this is more testimony to bad or absentee parenting than any social media influence.
I am more concerned about the long term effects of this behavior. If every boy in a highschool class has a copy of every girl's nude and/or masturbating videos, that must have an effect on the dating pool among young adults.
No evidence of this being the case. Excessive hyperbole.
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I doubt EVERY boy in the school has a nude of EVERY girl in the school. If so, it must be a pretty small school.
I also have to question the wisdom in blaming influencers. Are these kids all orphans who never had parents to instill some kind of self-respect in them from the time they were small? Adolescents will rebel, but the ones who had parents or guardians who were decent role models won't do it that way. I think this is more testimony to bad or absentee parenting than any social media influence.
Good points. If there is bad or absentee parenting, then there is a void that will get replaced, so it is not very effective to blame influencers.
If you want to know why someone is dysfunctional and drawn to 'bad' or dysfunctional people, look to their homelife and upbringing - or lack of.
I have a decades long history of only dating the best of the worst & I have the best dad & my parents gave me most stable upbringing in the world.
Truly. As a teenager I only dated the guys with the longest hair, who had the best dope connections & won all the fights. Lol.
As an adult, several of the guys I've dated have made international news. Organized crime. 1% MC Presidents. Ultra-wealthy bad boys who campaigned for president of the US.
I've been doing a lot of introspection to figure this out as to why I've been like this. It certainly hasn't served me well. Wish I could find a happy medium.
It is a big mistake to underestimate the human instinct to reproduce. If you think your "power of choice" or something can "override" your instincts - you are mainly wrong, but for an adolescent you are absolutely wrong.
A boy / girl attraction is as unchosen as the choice an infant has in suckling - none.
Bottom line - for whatever a million years of filtered down instincts have in mind - certain male behaviors click in female minds as "good to produce strong offspring." Not saying it's inevitable - but trying to overcome biology with logic or "feelings" or social media or peer pressure - not happening. You are in no better position now to make smart (mating) decisions as a teenager then you were in 1950, 1750 or 1750 BC. All the same.
I doubt EVERY boy in the school has a nude of EVERY girl in the school. If so, it must be a pretty small school.
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See, this is why sweeping generalizations are not only inappropriate, but potentially destructive. They help create and perpetuate stereotypes, which results in vilifying a significant percentage of girls who have no interest in the controversial activity.
"Oh, that's just the way teens are these days" is a meme that becomes widespread, even though it's not true of many. If the wrong people accept this erroneous belief, it could actually place teen girls in danger. There already are too many creeps out there, pedophiles, hebephiles; this kind of talk encourages those tendencies.
His graduating class had 98 graduates. It is a small school. They even have a competition rifle marksmanship team. How is that for rural?
My son never dated in highschool, and yet he appeared to have nudies from all the girls there. I saw most of them. Granted it was less than 50.
Am I the only one who is uncomfortable with this statement?
Like I could understand happening to get an unintended glance at one or two, followed by hopefully a sit down talk with your son. I had conversations with my sons about underage nude photos and videos and the legal and ethical implications of them, and strongly urged them never to save any such content on any of their devices. But it would be hard to see nudes of 50+/- teen girls unless you were looking on purpose.
I mean, I guess one would have to give a crap about the fact that these girls likely had misplaced trust in the recipients of the images, but probably didn't consent for you to look at them. I know that once a person puts a photo out there, it's out there, but my own ethics would have held me to not deliberately violate their consent regardless. I mean, you're supposed to be the adult, the one with the sense to make decent decisions.
Though usually I guess American society exempts men from carrying any responsibility for that in a situation like this. "Nature" and all. Though I'd find that pretty insulting if I were a man.
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