Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Hey everyone I have a friend who is in his mid 30s. He is a handsome guy with a good work ethic. He has a great personality-a little shy though. The only thing is he has been having problems dating. He is saving himself for that someone special. He says he is a virgin Yeah believe it. And he says the problem is that most women do not want to be with him because he has no experience... For argument sake lets assume my friend is really telling the truth about his virginity and that he is not gay. He asked me if I would date a guy in his situation. I had never thought about that before so I wanted to know from the ladies and guys u r free to comment as well: Would u prefer to be with a man who has had previous experience or one with no experience at all?
Location: The Raider Nation._ Our band kicks brass
1,853 posts, read 9,685,134 times
Reputation: 2341
This is more common than I originally thought. A buddy of mine at work has dated two 40ish virgin women. He has been with the second lady for 2 years. Things have flourished now, but she had to go to a doctor because of an extra thick hymen, and things were starting to shrink. "Use it or lose it" is very true in her situation.
I can also think of two other guys at work. One was just very shy and was afraid to approach women. He was in his late 30's when the right aggressive woman came along to rock his world. They are very happy now.
The other guy is a bit different. Mid 40's, good looking, low testosterone, lives with mom. He has ZERO sex drive. All of his focus is on watching any and all sports, and fishing. I would say he's not normal and it's a good thing that he didn't reproduce. He's dumb as a post.
There are exceptions to every rule, but on a whole, if they have not had sex by the time they are 30, it's probably best for society. There's enough pollution in the gene pool.
It depends...has he had any sexual experience at all? Maybe not intercourse but what about foreplay? Is he very attractive? Does he have a good personality? I'd be curious about this because it would also help me determine if it is truly HIS choice about whether or not he has had sex!
It depends...has he had any sexual experience at all? Maybe not intercourse but what about foreplay? Is he very attractive? Does he have a good personality? I'd be curious about this because it would also help me determine if it is truly HIS choice about whether or not he has had sex!
OK as a guy I have to say I'm tired of women with baggage. I've never been with a girl that was a virgin, but I think the next time I really seriously date a girl, it will be one with as little sexual experience as possible.
So ladies, I think you should grab that dude and break him in.
I agree that this is probably more common than most people realize.
Your friend will be fine. I've known some very shy guys that eventually met the right woman who appreciated them (usually a little older, usually a lot more outgoing) and it all worked out fine.
It's important not to focus on it as a "problem" too much - it will only bring his anxiety level up and that's not going to be attractive to anyone. He should think instead of the advantages - probably no significant baggage, no kids, no sexually transmitted diseases, etc.
There are exceptions to every rule, but on a whole, if they have not had sex by the time they are 30, it's probably best for society. There's enough pollution in the gene pool.
? What was with that comment? Some people just need somebody to force them into the situation. It takes some people a lot more to socialize than others. And that doesn't mean their genes are polluted, boy.
You know, I had a friend who was going to wait for the right person and at that time I thought I couldn't date him because I didn't want that kind of pressure, to be that one if it did happen. He ended up sleeping with an ex of his and regretting it because he knew she wasn't the right one when it happened, and when I did end up dating him I didn't mind waiting because by then I knew I could wait just fine and it would be better if he were ready and sure than to risk it being another mistake.
So I guess the short answer of it is that if I had to decide again I would say I would even if he was, because I'm also not one to throw around sex like it's nothing and prefer to wait for it to be the right time (even if they aren't necessarily the right person eventually) than to rush it. So kudos to your friend for holding his ground and I think it will probably help to weed out those he doesn't want to be with who can't have the patience to wait for him.
This is more common than I originally thought. A buddy of mine at work has dated two 40ish virgin women. He has been with the second lady for 2 years. Things have flourished now, but she had to go to a doctor because of an extra thick hymen, and things were starting to shrink. "Use it or lose it" is very true in her situation.
I can also think of two other guys at work. One was just very shy and was afraid to approach women. He was in his late 30's when the right aggressive woman came along to rock his world. They are very happy now.
The other guy is a bit different. Mid 40's, good looking, low testosterone, lives with mom. He has ZERO sex drive. All of his focus is on watching any and all sports, and fishing. I would say he's not normal and it's a good thing that he didn't reproduce. He's dumb as a post.
There are exceptions to every rule, but on a whole, if they have not had sex by the time they are 30, it's probably best for society. There's enough pollution in the gene pool.
That was so true but just so funny couldnt stop laughing
Nobody is going to like this.... but I am going to say it any way. I think society is going down the drain, because of sexual promiscuity. Unplanned pregnancies, between unmarried, and uncommitted partners, are increasing, and it is HARD on the children that come out of situations like that. We need to strengthen the family, if we want to strengthen America. What happened to the sanctity of marriage? What happened to the value of sharing intimacy with people we actually LOVE, and are committed to?
To the Original Poster, there is nothing wrong with your friend, there is something wrong with society. Why should anyone look down on someone, who respects himself, his future wife, and future children enough, that he doesn't have sex "Just for the experience."
And this statement.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by South Range Family
"There are exceptions to every rule, but on a whole, if they have not had sex by the time they are 30, it's probably best for society. There's enough pollution in the gene pool."
This statement couldn't be more ignorant. Anyone, can have sex and create life, and many people who father/mother unplanned/unwanted children, as a result of a one night stand, didn't have the sense enough to use protection, or refrain from the act in the first place. In my opinion, THEY are the pollution to the gene pool. The statement, that a person who wants to wait until they have a traditional family structure, before they take the risk of creating life is "a pollution to the gene pool".... is the dumbest thing I have ever heard. People can attempt the argument, that if one uses protection, that one is in the clear, but that is not accurate. EVERY TIME you sleep with someone, you run the risk of creating life, or if you don't know them well...catching an STD. EVERY TIME. If you are going to have sex, you MUST think of the possible outcomes, which are either a pregnancy, or an STD.
I respect an almost 40 year old virgin, WAY more than some one, who has slept with multiple partners, simply for the "experience." That would be the type of person I would want to date.
Last edited by Calibelle; 06-22-2007 at 05:30 AM..
Reason: toning down my post
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have a friend who is in his mid 30s. He is a handsome guy with a good work ethic. He has a great personality-a little shy though. The only thing is he has been having problems dating. He is saving himself for that someone special. He says he is a virgin
Yeah believe it
. And he says the problem is that most women do not want to be with him because he has no experience... For argument sake lets assume my friend is really telling the truth about his virginity and that he is not gay. He asked me if I would date a guy in his situation. I had never thought about that before so I wanted to know from the ladies and guys u r free to comment as well: Would u prefer to be with a man who has had previous experience or one with no experience at all?
