Ex's on facebook friends list. Little hard to swallow. (woman, single, older)
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I always say, they're your "ex" for a reason...no need to put them among your facebook friends.
My exes are ex because we both realized that we wouldn't work relationship wise but in general most are really good people and the things that attracted me to them in the first place make them really good friends.
It's all about respect. FB or not, if you have a partner that is sensitive to being exposed to a parade of ex-whatevers, out of respect for that person don't do it. Why would you want to do something that you know makes your partner feel bad ? Is that ex-relationship that important ? What value does it really bring anyway ? If they are an ex, there was a reason why. Why all of the sudden online you can now be friends ? The debate could go on and on. However, it's about respect for your partner and truly putting them first. It's amazing how a social network can create such anti-social issues.
All you folks who are "okay" with exes on facebook. What if that ex still had feelings for your SO, and made that known..EVEN THOUGH THEY KNEW YOU WERE IN THE PICTURE? My ex had a ex wife (no kids together) that lived out of state, but still called him on the phone from time to time. She would tell him she still cared for him, and that she could get him back if she wanted to. (they were married like 15 yrs ago) etc. During the first several months my ex and i were dating, she was still calling him. He would tell her to stop, put her on speaker phone when she called, etc...but she kept calling. One night, we are laying there cuddled together on the couch watching TV at 11pm at night..and she calls. He gave the phone to me..and I answered. Of course, she didnt say anything.
Now, i DID tell him to take her off of Facebook. THAT crap is just downright disrespectful, and she didnt deserve to be on any Facebook page or anything else. I mean, really.
All you folks who are "okay" with exes on facebook. What if that ex still had feelings for your SO, and made that known..EVEN THOUGH THEY KNEW YOU WERE IN THE PICTURE? My ex had a ex wife (no kids together) that lived out of state, but still called him on the phone from time to time. She would tell him she still cared for him, and that she could get him back if she wanted to. (they were married like 15 yrs ago) etc. During the first several months my ex and i were dating, she was still calling him. He would tell her to stop, put her on speaker phone when she called, etc...but she kept calling. One night, we are laying there cuddled together on the couch watching TV at 11pm at night..and she calls. He gave the phone to me..and I answered. Of course, she didnt say anything.
Now, i DID tell him to take her off of Facebook. THAT crap is just downright disrespectful, and she didnt deserve to be on any Facebook page or anything else. I mean, really.
So yeah, I know the facebook problems have been played to death but....
Ladies (and maybe guys I don't know) we do not want to see your ex or piles of your ex's all there laid out for us to see on your facebook friends list. There is no " Oh he's just an old boyfriend from high school". There is no " Well, we dated a little but you know nothing happened and were just friends".
That's funny. DH and I are both friends with many of his ex's. We are just friends. Is it a security issue?
I agree with the OP (and others that support the position of the OP) that we should not be friends with our ex's on Facebook, or any other social networking sites for that matter. I am not friend with any of my ex's....that's the magic of the breakup.
I ran into one of my ex-boyfriend's at church (he is happily married now with no intentions for me); he sent me and my SO a LinkedIn invite which I declined; I just thought it would not be appropriate. My SO felt bad and accepted his LinkedIn invite. So that is great (sarcasm), my SO and my ex are now LinkedIn.
So yeah, I know the facebook problems have been played to death but....
Ladies (and maybe guys I don't know) we do not want to see your ex or piles of your ex's all there laid out for us to see on your facebook friends list. There is no " Oh he's just an old boyfriend from high school". There is no " Well, we dated a little but you know nothing happened and were just friends". Please, save it for a fairy tale cause that's all a bunch of bs.
We don't want to Know, we don't want to see their flipping faces, we don't want to have to tolerate them saying hello on stupid facebook and you know damn well they are sending private message " Hellos" too so quit the whole parade. News flash, unless we married you right out of high school in a white dress we would just assume pretend we did and never be reminded there was anyone else before us. That's how it works. So if you love your guy get your damn ex boyfriends, flings, ex husbands and little secrets you won't own up to off your stupid precious facebook friends list.
Fellas, don't bother thanking me. Someone had to lay it down.
I am sorry but you sir are generalizing and treating this as if ALL women do this..and I am sorry to burst your bubble but not all of "us" have this mentality...there are some dirty bishes out there but to not tag us all with the same sentence...please...
First of all..there are some of us women out there that can break up amicably with a man and still have him as a friend...not a hang out but all the time.but ex's from the past that have their own lives as we do..
I know I do..And when I start dating someone new I tell them who they are so they know...
My ex's already understand our relationship and never cross lines and actually are happy that Ifound somebody..
Never have I had an issue as you state..
So my advice to you?
Is to know who you pick to be your SO..
And be a little more secure in who you are..
To me? A guy who has ex's as enemies? Makes me antsy..It makes me think
1. Hard to get along with
2. Hard to please
3. Insecure
4. isw a complete douche bag since there is always 2 sides to a story and some guys need to come with a warning label...especially the controlling ones...this wouldnt be you would it?
I have exes and former flames on my FB. So does my husband. We're all adults. Nobody cares.
If your insecurities are that bad, you should probably avoid FB altogether.
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