SHOULD I HAVE apologized after HE cheated?? (guy, cheating, husband)

[kimbey]

Don't know why you are so bitter with me Headhunter! I know I made a bad mistake but I
didn't do anything malicious! I asked for advice and not to be raked over the coals!!!!

[headhunter18]

Originally Posted by kimbey

Don't know why you are so bitter with me Headhunter! I know I made a bad mistake but I
didn't do anything malicious! I asked for advice and not to be raked over the coals!!!!

And I gave you advise, don't like it, too bad, but that's the way I am :, what else should you expect from someone who has been classified by a misogynist by some ignorant sheeple here.

[Hegotsoul831]

Wow. Im surprised you should even have to ask! Has the world turned over that much?
I think adultery is still wrong. So let me assure you with a profound, resounding Haail Naaaww!!!

[Raging-Hetero]

Originally Posted by Hegotsoul831

Wow. Im surprised you should even have to ask! Has the world turned over that much?
I think adultery is still wrong. So let me assure you with a profound, resounding Haail Naaaww!!!

But she's 46. According to maturity, 46 year olds aren't allowed to act that way, even when her heart's been torn to shreds.

I'd never cheat on an SO, but if this is all I get as payback, then I'll be more than happy.

[darrensmooth]

Originally Posted by Hegotsoul831

Wow. Im surprised you should even have to ask! Has the world turned over that much?
I think adultery is still wrong. So let me assure you with a profound, resounding Haail Naaaww!!!

did you actually read the OP? Her reaction was wrong

[kimbey]

Damn, I wish I could aplogize to his mother, but she wouldn't accept it anyway. She was very nice to me on the phone when I called though. Why, DAMN, did I call her. I am so pissed at myself. Just picked up the phone thinking, "I'll get him". Totally immature thing to do. I can't call cause then I am re-involving myself with a compulsive liar and cheater again. I am sure the mother is done with me as well and they have turned me into a complete "Beast" of a woman even though I was the one cheated on. Life lessons, even at my age...

[darrensmooth]

Originally Posted by kimbey

Damn, I wish I could aplogize to his mother, but she wouldn't accept it anyway. She was very nice to me on the phone when I called though. Why, DAMN, did I call her. I am so pissed at myself. Just picked up the phone thinking, "I'll get him". Totally immature thing to do. I can't call cause then I am re-involving myself with a compulsive liar and cheater again. I am sure the mother is done with me as well and they have turned me into a complete "Beast" of a woman even though I was the one cheated on. Life lessons, even at my age...

yeah at this point approaching the mother would be more about YOU and your guilt than about making it right. You would just be trying to make yourself feel better for what has transpired. Dont dwell on it.

[Wild Flower]

Originally Posted by kimbey

Thanks. I've learned, maybe a day late and a dollar short but I have learned an important lesson! I made a fool of myself and hurt people not involved. I guess no apology to anyone would mean anything at this point. Just gotta suck it up, move on and learn to be a much more mature person in the next one, if there is one. Obviously, I need help to learn how to vent my anger appropriately......I should have done the classy thing and taken the high road. Oh well, too late now I guess

Listen, you made a mistake. That makes you human. We all do things we are less than proud of and have to face the music, even if it is only in the mirror. As you've said, you learned a lesson. That means it was not wasted.

Some people will make a scene of some sort and believe that was their right. You challenged yourself on what you did. I think it is a natural reaction to try to make up for what we've done to someone, i.e. your trying to tell your ex sorry but going overboard by calling his mother. But now, you are facing it by asking this community.

Take to heart that you can learn from it and not repeat it. There are so many times in our life that we are faced hurt from other people. You can apply this lesson to other times. Stopping and thinking before you react can go a long way.

I say this for myself too. I will not tell you the times I reacted badly () but in time I learned from them. They say a person will continue to face lessons that they have not learned. That is what I try to remember when I am embarrassed by my own actions. That if I stop and examine my own behavior and how I would have liked to react, I can learn for next time (or the next time after that ).

[2mares]

Originally Posted by kimbey

Damn, I wish I could aplogize to his mother, but she wouldn't accept it anyway. She was very nice to me on the phone when I called though. Why, DAMN, did I call her. I am so pissed at myself. Just picked up the phone thinking, "I'll get him". Totally immature thing to do. I can't call cause then I am re-involving myself with a compulsive liar and cheater again. I am sure the mother is done with me as well and they have turned me into a complete "Beast" of a woman even though I was the one cheated on. Life lessons, even at my age...

Dont call, but dont worry so much about that either. My son broke up with a gf awhile back. I found out because she called me crying. I was mad at my son because I really liked her but I still had to support my son. Im sure she realizes what your ex did and dosent think bad of you.

[kimbey]

That was very nice of you. I think in my case, I am way too old to be calling someone's mother. I am truly ashamed! I hate when you can't make amends for something terrible that you did!