Do most guys in their 20s want kids? (wife, woman, loving)
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At 19 - you are still basically a child yourself. No need to be stressing out about all this right now. I had a good friend of mine that was considering selling her eggs in her early 20's because she was positive she didn't want to have children. 8 years later she is trying really hard to get pregnant. I also know other people that have never wanted to have children and probably never will. Does it really matter? Where are you living that this is such a big deal? Move to NYC. I'm 35 and pregnant with my first child. Most of my friends didn't get married until their late 20's/early 30's and are just now starting families - those that want children. I have friends that don't want children. It really isn't a big deal at all. However- all of my husband's friends from the south got married right out of college and started having children a few years later. It's a totally different mentality, I supposed.
Anyway - you're young. Just concentrate on your education. You seem a little bitter - don't be. You're too young to be bitter. Just have fun! Safe fun.
I'm 23, and the thought hasn't even crossed my mind. I'm in no position atm to even take care of one. Maybe when I am, I'll consider it. For now though, I too am more career oriented.
At 19 - you are still basically a child yourself. No need to be stressing out about all this right now. I had a good friend of mine that was considering selling her eggs in her early 20's because she was positive she didn't want to have children. 8 years later she is trying really hard to get pregnant. I also know other people that have never wanted to have children and probably never will. Does it really matter? Where are you living that this is such a big deal? Move to NYC. I'm 35 and pregnant with my first child. Most of my friends didn't get married until their late 20's/early 30's and are just now starting families - those that want children. I have friends that don't want children. It really isn't a big deal at all. However- all of my husband's friends from the south got married right out of college and started having children a few years later. It's a totally different mentality, I supposed.
Anyway - you're young. Just concentrate on your education. You seem a little bitter - don't be. You're too young to be bitter. Just have fun! Safe fun.
I'm not bitter though. I just have goals in life that I know won't provide a stable environment for children. That's one of the reasons why.
There are plenty of men out there who don't want kids and not all for the same reasons. One thing that always worried me was the cost. Raising children is expensive and I'm not just talking about the cost of clothes, health care, college, etc. I mean you have to buy a bigger place, which means living farther from work, which means paying more for gas. You have to buy a bigger car. If you travel or just go to a game, you have to pay for more people. So many people have kids for the wrong reasons and then they discover just how hard it really is.
Financial cost for sure is more...but you really can get by on little. What people overlook is the emotional and mental cost. Some people are not cut out to sacrifice that of themselves. It's one thing to work hard so you have the dough...another to sit down and spend time with your children, spend time making a real meal, attending events that your kids are involved in.
Let me say there's nothing like the love of a parent and child. To see them grow up and experience that bond. So although you sacrifice a lot you get a lot back in return.
I would say yes, every guy I know in their teens and 20s plan on having children someday and want to have kids sometimes in their 20s. Most of them want 2-4 kids although 3 kids seem to be the most desired amount.
I'm not bitter though. I just have goals in life that I know won't provide a stable environment for children. That's one of the reasons why.
I didn't mean you sounded bitter about not wanting to have children - I meant you sound bitter towards people who do want to have children or who have children. You call people "breeders." I don't think at 19 you should even think about having children - of course you can't provide a stable environment right now. Your life is your life and you can lead it however you choose - but why do you sound bitter towards those that choose to have children?
I didn't mean you sounded bitter about not wanting to have children - I meant you sound bitter towards people who do want to have children or who have children. You call people "breeders." I don't think at 19 you should even think about having children - of course you can't provide a stable environment right now. Your life is your life and you can lead it however you choose - but why do you sound bitter towards those that choose to have children?
I'm sorry if I came across that way. I actually say kudos to those who have chosen to have kids. It's just I keep reading stories of hostility from both sides and I wanted to understand them.
I'm sorry if I came across that way. I actually say kudos to those who have chosen to have kids. It's just I keep reading stories of hostility from both sides and I wanted to understand them.
Where are you reading these stories? I guess I'm just a little surprised - especially that you would have this experience at such a young age. Among my circle of peers - it's never been an issue. We talk about it, sure - do you want children - yes, no, maybe, etc. - but there has never been any judgement or hostility involved.
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