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I am not married so a friend would be with me....but I would feel the same if it was my significant other.
If it was something like needing stitches, etc......go wait in the car....go home and wait.....go to a coffee shop.....I will call you when I am done.
If it is an unknown/scary situation....please....stay with me.
I feel the same way about having surgery.....I don't need anyone out in the waiting room standing vigil. I am quite sure the doctor is not going to need you to assist if an emergency situation arises.
I have had several foot surgeries and back surgery, I always had my relative or friend leave.....go home, whatever.....I will call you when I am awake and it is over.....either to come and get me or to tell you the outcome.
The nurses are always surprised when they realize I am alone......until I tell them I told said person to go home.....I don't need anyone here to hold my hand. No reason to expect someone to spend hours sitting in a nasty/boring waiting room when they could be waiting for me in the comfort of their own home or running errands they need to do, etc.
I recently took a friend to the hospital for an exploratory fact finding mission done on her bladder/kidneys.....no cutting involved, but they had to put her under for the procedure.
She wanted me to stay, so I did. I was out in the waiting room for over 4 hours......I was miserable....my back was killing me and it took me a day to recover....those waiting room chairs can be torturous.
I would never dream of putting someone through that.....there is absolutely nothing you can do for me out in that waiting room......go home, relax, have your lunch, whatever.... I will call you when it is over. {or have the nurse/desk person call you, depending on the situation}
If it was a life or death situation and he just waited for her call, he might have waited all day if she ended up dying. Is there a reason the guy didn't go up with her?
She went in having severe pain the area of her Kidneys so it was not just a 'routine' visit.
He has cheated a few times.. including with her twin sister..
Ignores her and their kids constantly to play his XBOX
How is it that you are aware and sure of such intimate knowledge of details as fact - do you live with them, watch their every move or is this just neighborhood gossip? You might be playing with fire pinpointing the dynamics of their personalities and relationship when you don't even know them. Or is it one sided information being cackled around the neighborhood? There are usually A LOT more to these stories.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fearnofish
Yes.. his wife had surgery and he took time off work to 'care for her'.. well she still took care of their 3 kids under 3 years old all day while he played XBOX.
His actions make me look really good to my wife though
Again, with the XBOX and what he does with his time all day...you must spend a lot of time looking in their windows and obsessing over them.
That's not acceptable, even if it is a regular occurence.
I disagree. Not every visit to the ER is a severe emergency. Granted, what happened in the OPs story is unacceptable, but across the board? My twin was chronically ill and was in and out of the ER at least hundred times a year (practically lived in the hospital). It's not possible to wait that out every time. I dropped my husband off at the ER a year ago. His finger got infected (his own fault for not taking care of it) and it looked pretty bad. It needed to be lanced and neither of us wanted to do it. I made sure he was set up with insurance stuff and then I went to work.
My wife if livid and wants to smack him silly. Sometimes you look at a realationship and wonder how it still survives when it is completly one sided. I know when we move in a year if these two are still together that the wife will show up at our house one day with her kids needing somewhere to stay for a while.
I am not one to want a marriage to end usually but this one definatly needs some professional help but the husband is unwilling to see a counselor.
We have known them a while now and know them pretty good. I am usually the first to say the marriage is a two way street and get you what you put in. In this case the problem is him and not something that she has done to deserve it.
Fear of change and lack of self-confidence. Take it from someone who's been there.
IMO I would want my spouse to join me in the ER even if it wasn't life-or-death because it's such an awful atmosphere to be in and ER staff are terrible with blind people. I would just want another person there to vouch for me.
If it wasn't serious at all, though, I wouldn't be going to the ER to begin with. But anything I would go to the ER for would be serious enough to want to be accompanied.
Yes there is a lot more going on in their relationship. This just demonstrates how little he truely cares for her in my opinion. The coming days should be interesting to see how his wife reacts to him sitting in the car for 3 hours instead of by her side in the hospital.
Maybe she told him to stay in the car? Look, I've taken my dad to the hospital...ended up waiting in the waiting room for hours. It wasn't like the movies/television where the doctor, someone, entered the waiting room to give me updates. Had that scenario happen a few times. Basically, you just end up waiting for a few hours. These days with cell phones and all, does it matter where you wait?
And what is with supposed mature adults treating another like a child? Reprimanding someone to the couch for a month? Seriously? How old are you, and why are you treating the other adult like they are 12?
At least he took her to the ER and didn't make her take a cab. I see nothing wrong with him waiting in the car. If he dropped her off and then went off to drink or play pool with his buddies (or something similar), then I'd have a problem. Waiting in the parking lot of the ER, no problem.
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