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Usually six months to a year, typically close to the year mark. I got most of these proposals when I was in my 20s.
I alluded to this in another post, but the reason I turned them down was because it seemed to me like they just wanted to get married for the sake of getting married. I never felt that I was anything truly unique or special to them; I just happened to be the women they were dating when they decided it was time to settled down and do the family thing.
So, essentially, I could have been Just Anywoman, U.S.A.
That's how those multiple divorces happen, IMHO.
Also, I was still in my 20s and had things to do on my Bucket List. In retrospect, I should not have been dating anyone seriously during this time. But it's just something that you learn with age and wisdom.
The bolded is what I felt too about my ex who asked me to marry him. That, and because he wanted to "nail me down"..to be completely his.
The bolded is what I felt too about my ex who asked me to marry him. That, and because he wanted to "nail me down"..to be completely his.
I actually had one guy tell me after dating for around six months (paraphrased), "Either we get engaged or I'm breaking up with you."
Nice ultimatum, huh? I was just out of high school and about to leave for university.
Receiving "multiple proposals" didn't flatter my ego at all, as it was not a reflection of me but rather, what someone else wanted, arbitrarily. It led to a lot of painful times during which I necessarily had to let go.
I was talking about the men who propose.
A lot of the men are swindlers,theives,abusers.
This is what I experienced. But I don't get multiple proposals either. I date a certain demographic of men known to have commitment issues.
Well hon, you need to stop dating that demographic of men.
As for this conversation you ladies are having about these men who have proposed you intrigues me. So basically, these guys weren't really into you but just the idea of settling down and having a family.
I always had this idea that most young people just wanted to date around when they were younger but obviously sought to settle down but as all of you are saying it shouldn't be like that. Even though a guy reaches that point in his life it should be about the woman he's seeing and not that he just wants to settle down.
Okay sorry for rambling but my question is that what if a guy meets that special girl at a young age like 18 or 21? Let's say he had no thoughts of being tied down or married but he meets this girl and things are really clicking between them and she feels the same way about him, why not tie the not?
what if a guy meets that special girl at a young age like 18 or 21? Let's say he had no thoughts of being tied down or married but he meets this girl and things are really clicking between them and she feels the same way about him, why not tie the not?
He's way too young, as is she, if they're approximately the same age. They probably haven't even finished college yet at 21, never mind 18. I have nothing against marrying young, but 18 or 21 is just too young. At those ages it's unlikely that they have enough life experience to make a marriage work--especially the guy, since boys mature later than girls.
If things are clicking so well, they should just continue to date and see what happens. If it's real, they'll still want to be together after they've completed their educations, are employed, and have paid down some school loans. Age 23 or older would have a better chance of success.
I think that there are some guys who don't feel like "real men" unless they're rescuing someone, and this particular girl fits their bill. But like you said, these aren't typically the type of guy you'd be drawn to, and that's probably for a very good reason. You have different standards, and you probably have more respect for a man who wants a woman who can stand on her own two feet. I have -0- respect for men who allow themselves to be used like that. And I suspect that men feel the same way about girls who go after "loser" guys.
I've been proposed to several times, but this is not to say that I said "yes." In my case, the guys were the LifePlan (TM) types. You know, date six months, get married, buy a house in the 'burbs, have a couple of kids, don't really think about any of it too deeply. I don't think that they really wanted to marry me, per se — they just wanted to get married — and I can sniff that stuff out right away.
First of all, the pictures in that story - BLAH! If I didn't know how to read, I would've thought I was looking at one of those Faces of Meth compilations.
Anyhow, what you said about the guys who are more enamoured of the idea of marriage itself, rather than being married to a specific person, rings true in my life. These guys had it all planned out: get married by such and such age, have x amount of kids, the whole nine - and thought that they could just plop any random woman into that equation. Sometimes that random woman was me. Although I don't know what part of "I don't want kids" they didn't get.
I was actually talking to a friend of mine about this a while ago. I said it was like being at a carnival where they have those cardboard cutouts where you stick your faces in and then get your pictures taken. Picture one of those cardboard cutouts being of a "typical" family, and some guy trying to shoe-horn you into that picture somehow. That's how it felt to me.
Even though a guy reaches that point in his life it should be about the woman he's seeing and not that he just wants to settle down.
I've encountered women who seem to think that it is like a light switch in a guys head. Suddenly, he "realizes" that he needs to be married and any woman in his life at that time will be proposed to.
For starters, while many women may feel that they need to be married, this is something that rarely happens to men. The timing is almost entirely dependent on finding what he considers to be the right woman. As the years pass, this is happening to an ever shrinking number of men.
Now days, it is only divorced guys, whose ex is taking much of his income, who have a need to marry. Many will fulfill this "need" several times. Of course, it helps that they are generally of the type who women considered desirable so they had a good selection to encourage them to marry for the first time. After that, because of their desirability, they again get interest although, they men no longer be nearly as picky.
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Sorry
why do some women get proposed to several times
