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Okay so here's the quick and dirty rundown of my situation... Known a girl as just a friend for a while, developed feelings for her this past summer. Didn't act on feelings, but felt there might be a connection... never were really alone to express my feelings since we were always in social situations with others.. Started casually dating a girl in fall and am still dating this new girl, but pretty positive we are both just in it for the moment, nothing long term. Girl that is a friend knows this and whenever we talk she tells me I deserve better, etc... she knows I'm not completely happy. Recently I asked her if there was anything between us, and her immediate response was she didn't want to get in the middle of me and this girl. Which I understand, and would never date 2 girls at once.. Then I respond that I am sorry for even asking this sensing I might have been completely off base and feeling bad since I am dating someone at the moment... Then her next response is, "I guess I've never thought of you in that way." Next time I see her in person, I again say I am sorry for putting her in this position, and she says don't be sorry and that she is worried about me and that I need to figure out my situation. What do you guys make of this?
She says she never thought of you in that way, but that could change. If you tell her how you feel about her, maybe she'll give you a chance and go out with you and become attracted to you. A friend of mine was good friends with her husband for over 2 years and didn't think of him in that way either. One day he confessed that he had feelings for her and wanted to be more than just friends. He asked her to give him a chance and go out with him, and if she didn't, he would understand, but that he couldn't be friends with her anymore because it hurt too much to be around her. She really valued his friendship and didn't want to lose it and decided to give him a chance. They've been married for 20 years now. Instead of wasting your time pining away for this girl, I think you should ask her out and if she says no, you'll have closure and be able to move on and meet someone else who does like you in that way. Life is too short. You deserve to be happy.
Women are fickle. I am one, so I can say that. I know I never wanted to be anyone's second choice or back-up. Maybe, just maybe, she is feeling that way!
You have to love solicited advice on the internet. It's usually right on the money!
I think as the others have pointed out, I most likely have been friendzoned --- and part of me agrees with this...
The other part is in response to you Jenzen... I sort of did ask her out, and her answer was, "you are in a relationship with someone right now(bascially, this is not appropriate.) And as I said before and told her, I would never try and date 2 girls at the same time... So I'm not sure if response was letting me know, now is not the right time or was a friendly way to say no I'm not interested.. Only later does she say, "I've never thought of you that way.."
Plus she makes plans with our friends to do something a couple days later,(talk about awkard) and she is super friendly and she tells me she is worried about my relationship... This girl is very reserved by the way.
Women are fickle. I am one, so I can say that. I know I never wanted to be anyone's second choice or back-up. Maybe, just maybe, she is feeling that way!
I really think this might be the truth right here... I think I made her feel like a back-up.... when really she was always the starting QB to me...
Okay so here's the quick and dirty rundown of my situation... Known a girl as just a friend for a while, developed feelings for her this past summer. Didn't act on feelings, but felt there might be a connection... never were really alone to express my feelings since we were always in social situations with others.. Started casually dating a girl in fall and am still dating this new girl, but pretty positive we are both just in it for the moment, nothing long term. Girl that is a friend knows this and whenever we talk she tells me I deserve better, etc... she knows I'm not completely happy. Recently I asked her if there was anything between us, and her immediate response was she didn't want to get in the middle of me and this girl. Which I understand, and would never date 2 girls at once.. Then I respond that I am sorry for even asking this sensing I might have been completely off base and feeling bad since I am dating someone at the moment... Then her next response is, "I guess I've never thought of you in that way." Next time I see her in person, I again say I am sorry for putting her in this position, and she says don't be sorry and that she is worried about me and that I need to figure out my situation. What do you guys make of this?
Why on Earth is she worried about you? Are you contemplating doing something drastic? And what "situation" do you have? You like her. Does she like you? Remove current GF, who apparently you are not all into, and get with this girl. Jeeze, why does it need to be so complicated? How old are both of you? My guess is she really isn't into you. If she knows that you and the current gf are not anything serious and she doesn't even know the gf, then I think she would have been honest and told you how she actually feels about you.
Why on Earth is she worried about you? Are you contemplating doing something drastic? And what "situation" do you have? You like her. Does she like you? Remove current GF, who apparently you are not all into, and get with this girl. Jeeze, why does it need to be so complicated? How old are both of you? My guess is she really isn't into you. If she knows that you and the current gf are not anything serious and she doesn't even know the gf, then I think she would have been honest and told you how she actually feels about you.
She knows the girlfriend, and we both have mutual friends... she has always been unusually curious about my relationship and gives me the I deserve better line...
I think you are right though, I did give her the opportunity to come clean with her feelings and she didn't...
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