I gained weight, why is he still into me? (lover, divorce, emotionally)
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Take it from a man- I look back and wonder if I have ever really been in love...which is a sad thing to admit. Maybe this guy has fallen in love- for the first time...I say take a chance- Nothing ventured nothing gained.
Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all..
Absolutely. Love, pain, hate, laughter....it all means you're alive and actually feeling something.
I don't think what "kind of guy" he is is changing; I think that the way men comport themselves in relationship to women (and this goes the other way as well) depends not just on them, but also on the specific woman and on the context of the situation. Behavior in context often is just that, not a fundamental character trait.
If he was just looking to sleep around, he wouldn't still be interested in a girl with your body type (seeing as he doesn't go for that normally) who doesn't put out. If he was just looking for a relationship, he wouldn't be sleeping around. The only way to rationalize his behavior, assuming we are getting a relatively full and accurate picture from your posting, is that he is fine having casual sex with girls he isn't really into except physically, but also has a strong crush on you and would want more than that, and perhaps part of why he isn't into the other girls for a relationship is because of his feelings vis-a-vis you.
Sounds like he's a mess on the inside! How did I miss seeing that?!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Oleg Bach
Take it from a man- I look back and wonder if I have ever really been in love...which is a sad thing to admit. Maybe this guy has fallen in love- for the first time...I say take a chance- Nothing ventured nothing gained.
Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all..
We have the same friends, if it ends up being loved and lost, I wouldn't want to see him as often as I do now since I will be hurt, which means our friends would have to choose and hang out with us separately
...........no offense, but you really don't have a great grasp on the way guys think. Almost no one has a success rate so high that someone becomes a nearly pathological challenge for saying no; the response to a girl who you only want to get in the pants of who gains substantial weight isn't "she turned me down earlier and now I will more easily be able to reverse that earlier iniquity!" but rather "hah, she turned me down and now she isn't even in my league anymore ."
This guy's behavior is not natural for someone who just is looking to hit and run.
Don't you come on this forum and detail a scenario by which this man isn't some manipulative bastard. Don't you know where you are? ...
So there's this friend that I went on a few dates with almost a year ago but because we didn't want the same things(I didn't want to put out that soon, but he did), I decided that it is much better if we stayed friends instead and he said he agreed. We have the same circle of friends and we're all really close so we see each other fairly often. However, he still tries to get my attention (i.e. hug a little longer than necessary, opportunities to touch me, etc.) Also my friend said that he's still into me. I gained 20 lbs since the last time we went on a date. Why is he still into me? He's really good looking and works out a lot so I don't understand why he would be attracted to me when I'm 20 lbs heavier? I already know I am an insecure person, but still, it's hard for me to justify someone that good looking pursing someone like me at this weight.
Maybe you carry it well. But any type of weight gain of more than 10% of your previous weight in any given year is alarming and a sign that you may want to change eating habits and or add in some exercise to your routines.
Might be ur face. The gyms are full of ugly people with nice bodies, thats why i cant stand gyms, or online hookup sites...great body, you beg them tounlock private pictures...and u get a mutt face...gross!
Wow. I think some of y'all are being hard on dude.
Thinking a girl he's known 2 years and has dated a month might actually be ready to have sex with him does not make him some kind of manwhore.
And actually asking for clarification on what her norms are when he finds out she's not ready doesn't make him a selfish pig. Isn't that the kind of convo grownups are supposed to have when they date?
And being upfront about not wanting to wait a year is honest. He could have said okay and then just screwed around behind her back until she said yes. Instead, he said I can't give you what you want and backed away.
I don't think this guy has done anything wrong. He's single and he's a flirt. Big whoop.
If he's that good looking he can get sex. I think he clearly likes her on some level. It's up to her whether she thinks he's ready to really be what she needs. He could be just flirting because he still has a crush. That doesn't mean he's really going to be who she wants him to be.
Might be ur face. The gyms are full of ugly people with nice bodies, thats why i cant stand gyms, or online hookup sites...great body, you beg them tounlock private pictures...and u get a mutt face...gross!
You noticed that too? Like the old saying....beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes to the bone.
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