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Because some people want to know. It should be their choice if they want to be with someone who is bisexual. If you feel it's no big deal, then what's the big deal and letting people know what they are getting into?
yeah, I wanna know if my dude is into dudes. Which means he no longer would be my partner.
No one has a "right" to know in the first place.
I had a boyfriend who was molested as a child. I didn't have a "right to know" but he did disclose that during that time a dog was involved. So he had weird fantasies about a specific breed of dog. As time passed, they lessened. Why should I care?
It wasn't my business and he has no interest in messing around with dogs in real life anyhow. I was honored he felt safe to tell me, and because we had a solid loving foundation, it was fine. Well until he got into meth.... high school is so much fun...
If you would have cared aka seen the red flags/signs you would not have gotten involved with a guy who then turns to drugs.
I don't know if I agree with Sprite or not - that I have "a right" to know if my SO is bisexual or not. I've never had a reason to consider it.
Emotional intimacy suggests we will get vulnerable and reveal things about ourselves that are potentially unattractive or scary or shameful or embarrassing or whatnot...therefore I would expect my partner to eventually share that he is bi - regardless of the actions he may or may not participate in. You can be bi but not have sex with your gender. You can think/feel all you want - it doesn't mean one is acting on it.
If he withholds the info for a long time and we get very involved - I assume he is still working on that part of himself, is in deep denial, can't accept it (and suffering as a result), or thinks this is none of my business. I haven't been involved with someone who keeps secrets like this so I do not have an opinion. I do think if you are bi or gay you should just *be* and anyone who knows me knows I am like that. If he is hiding it from himself I'd be more concerned about his emotional wellbeing than what gender he wants to bang.
But some bisexual men do claim that they feel something is missing when they are married to women. They miss being with men. I know some bisexual men who actually state this. Go on some bisexual forums. Many of them are with women but still yearn or long for sex with men. They want their wives to be open to threesomes or letting them having a boyfriend on the side.
Yup. And there are also very many bisexual people who are happy as clams in strictly monogamous relationships.
Sexuality has nothing to do with the ability to commit to one person.
And if that person thinks it isn't the other persons business, that's fine to.
The person who wants to know can move on if they don't like being told it isn't your business by the person they're dating.
Again, no one is being restricted at all from making choices on who they date or not.
Well, some people don't ask, they might assume the person is straight or gay. I hope the person who might not think to ask, still will be given the choice.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sprite97
Well, some people don't ask, they might assume the person is straight or gay. I hope the person who might not think to ask, still will be given the choice.
What people assume is their problem. If they don't ask, they certainly can't expect to receive an answer. And if they don't ask, they can't have the info to make a choice about.
Yup. And there are also very many bisexual people who are happy as clams in strictly monogamous relationships.
Sexuality has nothing to do with the ability to commit to one person.
That's true. But I think the problem is that some women can possibly take it if their husband/boyfriend cheats on them with a woman, but I think it's on another level if it's with a man.
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