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Dewdrop: Women do not think of children more because they always know who the mother is. Maybe it's instinct or nature or whatever - but when you are a mother - you see all children differently and you want to protect them.
Not true. That is an idyllic view of mothers and motherhood. Have you ever heard of the foster care system aka Child Protective Services? It exists and is overburden in this country because there are a number of mothers who see children as a an unnecessary burden, someone to physical, verbally, and emotionally abuse, something to discard, barter away in exchange for something else she wants, or to place drugs or a man above her children. Other mothers care about their own children but will not put themselves out for someone else's childrens (such as stepchildren, relatives childrens). There is no one rule of behavior that applies to all mothers because the reality is mothers are human so the potential for good and evil exist within them. Which aspect comes out depends on the individual themselves.
Dewdrop: Women do not think of children more because they always know who the mother is. Maybe it's instinct or nature or whatever - but when you are a mother - you see all children differently and you want to protect them.
Not true. That is an idyllic view of mothers and motherhood. Have you ever heard of the foster care system aka Child Protective Services? It exists and is overburden in this country because there are a number of mothers who see children as a an unnecessary burden, someone to physical, verbally, and emotionally abuse, something to discard, barter away in exchange for something else she wants, or to place drugs or a man above her children. Other mothers care about their own children but will not put themselves out for someone else's childrens (such as stepchildren, relatives childrens). There is no one rule of behavior that applies to all mothers because the reality is mothers are human so the potential for good and evil exist within them. Which aspect comes out depends on the individual themselves.
I was speaking of my own feelings and of the feelings expressed by other mother's on this thread. I was talking about the responses on this thread.
Yes, bad people exist. Thank you for clarifying that for me.
The only people who would stand to lose by effectively mandating paternity testing would be vile deceitful women.
Exactly.
Well if it is a mandatory system, the DNA can certainly cross referenced to see if the guy is a father to any other kids out there, and he can be mandated to pay child support then. I see no reason that the government wouldn't use this aspect of mandatory paternity testing to reduce the amount of public assistance they give out.
Dewdrop: Women do not think of children more because they always know who the mother is. Maybe it's instinct or nature or whatever - but when you are a mother - you see all children differently and you want to protect them.
Not true. That is an idyllic view of mothers and motherhood. Have you ever heard of the foster care system aka Child Protective Services? It exists and is overburden in this country because there are a number of mothers who see children as a an unnecessary burden, someone to physical, verbally, and emotionally abuse, something to discard, barter away in exchange for something else she wants, or to place drugs or a man above her children. Other mothers care about their own children but will not put themselves out for someone else's childrens (such as stepchildren, relatives childrens). There is no one rule of behavior that applies to all mothers because the reality is mothers are human so the potential for good and evil exist within them. Which aspect comes out depends on the individual themselves.
Who is trying to paint an idyllic view of moms here? If anything though, it is more of a comparative view of the genders. Women are certainly less likely to opt out of parenting entirely though, so yeah that means there are some that don't do such a good job of it.
I never realized till I started lurking so much in the relationship forum how many women hating men are on CD.
The men here simply want women to accept responsibility for the mistakes they made. Men make mistakes just like women, but a good number of women always want to get off with light punishment, or get way all together scot-free.
Just look at this thread, so many women are chiming in to downplay the situation, and basically say, the guy stuck with the kids needs to continue on raising the kids even though he was fraudulently deceived into fatherhood.
Truth be told, many of you girls, as we business owners say, operate within the "gray area" because I know for a fact if any of you women were fraudulently overcharged on a credit card bill, or an extra student loan payment, you would vehemently exercise your right to dispute the fraudulent charges, or outright refuse to pay the out of principle because you were fraudulently deceived into taking on extra responsibility.
Okay $25K to ex-husband which is probably a portion back to him.
How about the Mom's children finding out who's the biological father of these kids.
Let her take out her who she "have sex book" and find out. Yeah it might be from a long time ago but she made her bed by most likely deceiving her ex-husband now let her lie in it. I do feel badly for the kids who are the innocent bystanders.
Unless the ex-husband wants to "adopt" these children, logically he shouldn't be on the hook for those kids expenses who are not biologically his.
Go on Maury!
I agree, simply like you said it is only a portion of whatever he paid into the care of those children. This also does not include the emotional aspects either, raising children that you thought were yours and not to mention the time that was wasted in them not knowing their biological fathers.
The men here simply want women to accept responsibility for the mistakes they made. Men make mistakes just like women, but a good number of women always want to get off with light punishment, or get way all together scot-free.
Just look at this thread, so many women are chiming in to downplay the situation, and basically say, the guy stuck with the kids needs to continue on raising the kids even though he was fraudulently deceived into fatherhood.
Truth be told, many of you girls, as we business owners say, operate within the "gray area" because I know for a fact if any of you women were fraudulently overcharged on a credit card bill, or an extra student loan payment, you would vehemently exercise your right to dispute the fraudulent charges, or outright refuse to pay the out of principle because you were fraudulently deceived into taking on extra responsibility.
I think everyone should accept responsibility for their mistakes - I just don't think that this was the way to go about it. I'm not sure what would be proper punishment - I just wish the kids didn't have to be involved in this at this age. It would be much easier on them if this happened when they were very tiny or grown adults. I'm not sure that this could be punishable with a jail sentence. I understand the fraud involved - but what it comes down to is adultery. I think it's a grey area and I'm not sure I want adultery to be punishable by law. This wouldn't affect me - but I just don't think that this is something we should do as a society. I understand being compensated monetarily - but at the same time, depending on her finances, it might be taking money away from the children as opposed to punishing her. I don't really know what the right answer is here - I just feel like all the choices made by both parents have been the wrong answers. Once again - just glad that this will never happen to my family.
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