Major Marital Problems And A Bad Case of a Mother in Law From Hell (girlfriends, how to)
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iknowftbll, she lives far away so i will have to contact her by phone so no pushing or shoving match there!! lol and i feel like for all these yrs, ive been taking the high road and it left me with alot of resentment and built up rage. now i hate my husband and his entirely family. i dont like being a doormat i feel like its coming to the point where im going to have to tell her to stay away from her own son that wont go well because my husband already said he will defend her because that his mom and he knows her longer than me .. i hate that stupid excuse.
and this neediness is fake. when we found out that his dad died, she left a voicemail for muy husband and he played it back, she was like oh honey!! daddy died!! please come here i need u! i need u here with me please i need u here!! crying like a maniac.. then she left a voicemail for me thats about 2 mins aprt from my husbands saying, hi Mandy, Mr. (last name) died a while ago. can u please call me? beciayuse i need u? all calm and colllected. not a souund of tears or nothing. my husband thought it was strange andthen he said well everyone mourns differently to other people. i felt like a stranger when she said mr (last name ) died. no emotion nothing. her neediness is fake and pathetic.
rockjock1729, he told me i couldnt contact his command but if i did, they would boot him out . thats why i havent. i just figured hes a grown up and will take care of his problems eventually. he needs an intervention i think. he doesnt like to go out. he doesnt like to do anything lately except watch war/military movies documentaries etc he sleeps past 1pm on the weekends and doesnt have any enthusiam to do anything with me or the twins.
mir86, lol! ure comment made me think of that movie "the first wives club" starring goldie hawn, diane keaton and bette midler . omg that movie was so funny and they too cleaned out their husbands financially, emotionally and just about anything those girls could get their hands on. it was such a funny movie!
From what you've posted here, it sounds to me like he's been getting more depressed/stressed with each deployment. Add to that his father's death. He should have been in therapy long before that, to deal with whatever issues came up during his deployments. But maybe, coming from a family like that, he was prone to depression, anyway...?
If he doesn't see the need for therapy (I don't know what kind of an option that would be, if he's going to be away most of the time, anyway), it sounds like this is going to get worse, not better. Do you have marketable job skills? Could you support yourself and the kids if you were on your own?
Boy, that doctor his mom wanted him to marry sure dodged a bullet!
mir86, lol! ure comment made me think of that movie "the first wives club" starring goldie hawn, diane keaton and bette midler . omg that movie was so funny and they too cleaned out their husbands financially, emotionally and just about anything those girls could get their hands on. it was such a funny movie!
One of my most favorite movies! I vote you do the same!
with every deployment he seems to come back a little different. a little nastier, a lil sour and all and his dad dying is just totally affecting him. his sleep, his attitude, everything. it hurts because when im having a bad day i dont take it out on anyone noteven people i dont know but his attitude is very unpredictble and i never know what mood hes going to be in. thats why i was thinking maybe he has multiple personality disorder. who knows?!
his gf was a psychology major and she was going to be a rehab counsellor. something like that .. his mom heard psychology and saw a doctors career and $$$.
i ask him to change his ways. he goes thru chewing tobacoo like nothing. and its so gross. i went to college but that really doesnt mean anything these days. its going to be hard for me to be on my own financially and i guess socially as my family doesnt live close by and one of my daughters is showing signs of autism so i have alot going on. to get a job right now feels like im going to be missing out on other needs in the family and household. this is why i figured i would stay in this broken irreconcilable marriage because like i said it got too comfortable. well not comfortable just routine.
It sounds like he's depressed and needs help. That's not unusual after the death of a loved one.
As for you and the kids, if a daughter is diagnosed as autistic, you might be eligible for some for of Social Security or other public benefits. Would you be able to move back with your parents, while you look for a job? Maybe they or some friends of theirs could help you find a job in their area. It's worth considering, anyway. This isn't a good situation to raise kids in.
with every deployment he seems to come back a little different. a little nastier, a lil sour and all and his dad dying is just totally affecting him. his sleep, his attitude, everything. it hurts because when im having a bad day i dont take it out on anyone noteven people i dont know but his attitude is very unpredictble and i never know what mood hes going to be in. thats why i was thinking maybe he has multiple personality disorder. who knows?!
his gf was a psychology major and she was going to be a rehab counsellor. something like that .. his mom heard psychology and saw a doctors career and $$$.
i ask him to change his ways. he goes thru chewing tobacoo like nothing. and its so gross. i went to college but that really doesnt mean anything these days. its going to be hard for me to be on my own financially and i guess socially as my family doesnt live close by and one of my daughters is showing signs of autism so i have alot going on. to get a job right now feels like im going to be missing out on other needs in the family and household. this is why i figured i would stay in this broken irreconcilable marriage because like i said it got too comfortable. well not comfortable just routine.
You may have shared this in your previous thread, but what rank and branch of service is your husband? How long has he been in? How long have you two been married? How many deployments has he been on?
Yo, I haven't read anything really on this thread past the part where the dude's mother assaulted you, OP. I would've walked at that point if he hadn't cut off contact or demanded that she seek psychological help or SOMETHING. You've got more than enough reason to leave. So do it.
It sounds like him and his entire family are nuts.
And I'm not so sure it's his mother he's always talking to and spending time with. More likely his other wife and kids. The ones he's going to leave everything to if he dies. That's the first thought that came to my mind anyway. Something just isn't right with this situation.
I think you would do best to get out. ASAP. At the very least it's an emotionally abusive relationship. And it doesn't sound like the kids benefit much from him or his family being in the picture.
Last edited by Christina311; 01-29-2013 at 09:00 PM..
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