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Me and this girl were on and off dating for about 10 months last year. we were extremely close, we would see each other at least 3 times a week, even in the periods when we weren't hooking up or dating. we were pretty much best friends. in december she went back to her ex of 4 years and we didn't speak for 4 months. i saw her 4 months later and she said they broke up and we started seeing each other again for the past 3 months. now this last month she told me we just friends again, and i said fine and started going no contact. after that day i seen her once a week and everytime we have kissed and been super close, yet after the time spent she goes distant and i dont hear from her for like a week.
so last friday we hung out and everything was great. on the monday i tried to call her, she ignored my call, didnt call back. tuesday i tried to call her again twice, no answer no call back. then it happened. my grandfather passed away on wednesday morning and i am living in another country so i was very sad and lonely. i texted her asking if shes ok cos she didnt return my calls and i told her the sad news and i said i could really use someone to talk to. well she replied immediately saying she's sorry for my loss etc and said she will call me later. didnt hear from her all day, so i called her in the evening. no reply but she called back straight away and was very offish on the phone, like she had to speak to me. then after about 2 minutes on the phone, she said she has another call, she'll call me back. no call back. texted her an hour later saying if u not busy after work do u wana come hang out, i could use a laugh and just relax with you. no reply.... everyone i know has gone out their way to message me and call me to see how i am doing, yet the girl i care for the most acted like she couldn't give 2 s and i haven't even heard a word from her... we supposed to be close friends. even if we not dating. so i'm really hurt and disappointed that she would act this way, all i needed was to talk to her and know that i can count on her. but she has just been the opposite and didnt even reply when i asked her if she could come over.. is this the right time for me to just walk away, or do I call her out on this?
I think it depends on what you want. If you really want to try to salvage the relationship, call her out on it. Ask her why she's doing this and it's like she's playing games. Ask her flat out if she's your friend or not.
But if you are sick of it, or think you will continue to have a hard time, I think you should go back to no contact (and go as far as to block her texts, Facebook messages, calls, everything). If she's really truly sorry, she can write you a letter.
My unsolicited advice to you is to find another woman to date. Keep your friend as a friend if you like or cut her out of your life completely; but avoid a romantic relationship as she sounds like she'd not be a match communication-wise for you (and that will only cause you heartache, frustration, and maybe resentment).
Whatever happens and whatever you do, I wish you the best outcome and the best of luck. Also, I am very sorry for your loss.
You sound like a needy, annoying puppy. Grow a pair and act like a man. She's clearly not interested. The signals aren't mixed at all, you've annoyed her to where she doesn't want to talk to you anymore but feels bad/obligated because you are needy.
Sorry to be so blunt but maybe it will harden you up a little.
My unsolicited advice to you is to find another woman to date.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jsun556
Grow a pair and act like a man. She's clearly not interested.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
should have call it quiets long ago when you were being used as a rebound, imo
she's a flake, move on to better things.
They've all pretty much said what I was gonna say: this chick doesn't see you as boyfriend material. Nor does she really want to be your friend. Dump this broad. Both as a friend and as a girlfriend.
You guys are done and she is not interested in a real relationship. Even if she changes her mind and tries to come back later, you will always know that she wasn't there for you when you lost a family member and needed a friend.
I would just walk away at this point and start spending my time with the friends that were there for me when I lost a family member.
You sound like a needy, annoying puppy. Grow a pair and act like a man. She's clearly not interested. The signals aren't mixed at all, you've annoyed her to where she doesn't want to talk to you anymore but feels bad/obligated because you are needy.
Sorry to be so blunt but maybe it will harden you up a little.
i'm far from needy mate. in the past month i have seen her once a week, in between that we haven't been speaking at all. only to arrange to meet up.. the last time i saw her was friday where she came to chill at my place and we had a great time, she still said she wants to come over again next week... how is that needy???
point is even if we not together, she is supposed to be my friend, someone i can rely on.. we do things a lot for each other and always have in the past. just 2 weeks ago i lost my bank card and couldn't get cash for a week. she immediately offered to loan me some even though she didn't really have to loan me. then i saw her this past friday, we had a great time together, she said she wants to come chill at my place again next week. i didnt contact her for 2 days after that, then i tried to call her, then she was just ignoring me out the blue.
is it such a crime to ask someone who is supposed to be close to you if they can spend abit of time with you after she heard the news my grandpa died.. i'm also living in another country, so it has been even tougher on me not being back home with my family.. it's not my fault or me being needy when one week she is going out of her way to help me, to ignoring me completely for no reason... she's not just some girl i been speaking to for a month or something, we been fuken close for almost 2 years... anyway u are all right for sure, she has shown me her true colors now, guess u find it out always in the toughest times.. trust me their is no way i am contacting her in any way again, no chance.. i'm sure she will contact me at some point and act like this never happened.
Last edited by benny_guy; 09-26-2013 at 07:53 AM..
You say you're not needy, but everything in your two posts that you have made here suggests otherwise.
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