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It's a tremendous thing. It isn't even that women care that I can lift more, or lost 10#, or whatever... I don't think they do. It's that I feel better about me, and when I feel good about me people pick up on that. It makes a huge difference. Slumping people that don't feel good about themselves and how they look are not attractive.
When I don't go to the gym and I start losing my muscle it affects me negatively and I start becoming a lazier person.
Exercise is one of the most important things a person can do for their own mental health.
People who go on and on about their "anxiety" typically are not looking for help, they are only looking for sympathy
These days, everyone who gets upset is depressed and everyone who feels uncomfortable has social anxiety. I'm not denying that anxiety and depression are very serious... but it seems like everyone uses it for an excuse instead of trying to get over it.
YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES.
What used to be considered situational shyness or nervousness is now a full blown psychological diagnosis. And what better way to play the victim and find lazy reasons to never have to work on changing?
It is rampant on these boards and it makes me ill.
Who handed out all these crutches, and why are young men so willing to accept them?
And yet despite all these negatives, I deserve much better than these "plain women."
Attitude goes along way, in our society we are often too focused on "what are we going to get or what we are going to get out it or i deserve etc" Instead maybe we should be asking ourselves at each side "what are we bringing to the table or what can we bring" if we did this more, i believe we wouldn't have any problems finding someone we deserve or having bad results in relationships. Less "I" more "We".
People who go on and on about their "anxiety" typically are not looking for help, they are only looking for sympathy
These days, everyone who gets upset is depressed and everyone who feels uncomfortable has social anxiety. I'm not denying that anxiety and depression are very serious... but it seems like everyone uses it for an excuse instead of trying to get over it.
It's not that easy to cure one self of depression and anxiety. I used to be much more depressed than I am now. It's something you tackle little by little.
I have depression out of trauma, and my social anxiety comes from a lack of social skills which was due to the fact that I turned to isolation to limit exposure to bullying and abuse.
When I don't go to the gym and I start losing my muscle it affects me negatively and I start becoming a lazier person.
Exercise is one of the most important things a person can do for their own mental health.
And the OP should remember that he doesn't have to exercise in a gym if that's not his bag (and it might not be if he's that socially anxious.) Take up tennis. Buy a bike and ride it everywhere. Train for a 5K. Get exercise videos on YouTube. Whatever floats your boat.
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
Who handed out all these crutches, and why are young men so willing to accept them?
I wonder if this is the end result of the "everyone's a winner" sort of helicopter parenting. There's a whole generation of young people who always got a part in the play or a position on the team and a trophy for just showing up. They've never been told no, they don't know how to deal with consequences, and they don't know how to advocate for themselves.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by burgler09
When I don't go to the gym and I start losing my muscle it affects me negatively and I start becoming a lazier person.
Exercise is one of the most important things a person can do for their own mental health.
Fully agree, I don't know how many people that I've been friends with that have been on depression meds for years (dysthymia) and once they got into exercising regularly. Making it part of their daily routine, they've been able to get off them.
It's not that easy to cure one self of depression and anxiety. I used to be much more depressed than I am now. It's something you tackle little by little.
I have depression out of trauma, and my social anxiety comes from a lack of social skills which was due to the fact that I turned to isolation to limit exposure to bullying and abuse.
Yeah understandable but first you have got to stop abusing yourself, change your selftalk, change your life. Simple.
It's not that easy to cure one self of depression and anxiety. I used to be much more depressed than I am now. It's something you tackle little by little.
I have depression out of trauma, and my social anxiety comes from a lack of social skills which was due to the fact that I turned to isolation to limit exposure to bullying and abuse.
Never said it was easy, but if you don't start making some changes in your life you will be 35 years old, 500+ pounds and even more depressed.
Most of us on this board have probably gone through periods of anxiety. If you don't get over it or put all of your effort into it, you'll end up passing 10 years by in isolation asking yourself why you just wasted a good portion of the only life you'll get.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
Who handed out all these crutches, and why are young men so willing to accept them?
It's easier to blame and point fingers or just complain, than to work and fix a bad situation. Emotional, physical and intellectual laziness permeates our culture at nearly all levels.
What used to be considered situational shyness or nervousness is now a full blown psychological diagnosis. And what better way to play the victim and find lazy reasons to never have to work on changing?
It is rampant on these boards and it makes me ill.
Who handed out all these crutches, and why are young men so willing to accept them?
If you have to ask that...
I think it's due to a lack of a father figure.
And it's ignorant to say that we never work on changing. There are people who get out depression and recover from poor mental health. It's not easy and not overnight, though, and in the mean time ranting about the problem makes life temporarily feel better.
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