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Old 06-02-2014, 09:13 AM
 
12,585 posts, read 16,961,568 times
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Wow!

The responses against coffee amazes me!!

"Wanna meet for coffee?"
"I don't like coffee! The smell, the taste, the.."
"Do you want to meet me in person or not Jackass?!?!"
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Old 06-02-2014, 09:19 AM
 
Location: NY
9,130 posts, read 20,024,007 times
Reputation: 11707
I think "coffee dates" are one of the best options for a first date. Particularly if the date was arranged through internet dating.

Why?

The environment. It is a calm environment where casual conversation is relaxed and easy. There are not a ton of distractions. It aides in getting to know your date a little.

It is casual. No need to worry about how dressed up, or formal one should be. It is a coffee place. Anything goes. Yes, for a first date one would look nice of course, but still casual enough to be yourself too.

It can be quick. Some first dates are better than others. If there really is no chemistry at all, the date can be moved along or ended. Conversely, if the date is going well... it can keep going.

It is public and visible. A plus especially for online dating where someone may have a concern about "Safety" when meeting someone for the first time.

Most people can find something to eat/drink if that is their desire. I tend to have frequented the locally owned places myself, but whether there or a chain place, the menu is FAR more diverse than a cup of coffee. In fact, I tend not to drink coffee on these dates to avoid becoming too nervous/jittery from having caffeine.

It can happen at any time of the day or night and is not bound by traditional lunch or dinner times, happy hours, or anything like that.

Probably more too. Either way, a coffee place has always seemed like a positive location in my experience.
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Old 06-02-2014, 09:23 AM
 
3,009 posts, read 3,644,762 times
Reputation: 2376
Quote:
Originally Posted by funymann View Post
Wow!

The responses against coffee amazes me!!

"Wanna meet for coffee?"
"I don't like coffee! The smell, the taste, the.."
"Do you want to meet me in person or not Jackass?!?!"
I don’t like Starbucks anymore cause you go there and they – they don’t care anymore, they just press a button and some old ladies diarrhea comes out and they give it to you. (Louis CK)

Just as long as it is not Starbucks than it is all good.
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Old 06-02-2014, 09:34 AM
 
Location: Harbor Springs, Michigan
2,294 posts, read 3,431,826 times
Reputation: 4654
Coffee date ? why not give it a chance, you never know right ????

If I hadn't agreed to one particular coffee date that turned into a sightseeing tour that turned into a nice evening meal I wouldn't have met my wonderful husband. We call it our first 3 dates, we clicked right away and spent 13 hours together, chatting, laughing and enjoying the day. He's my soul mate, we married less than a year later and 4 years later friends still call us the newly weds. Happy doesn't even begin to describe it.

So its not about where you meet but your attitude going in, cheap? no problem, its a first meeting ... would it have mattered if we had met at an expensive restaurant ? not one bit.

My advice is stop being so picky, you never know when or where you will meet that one special person.
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Old 06-02-2014, 09:40 AM
 
Location: Clayton, NC
257 posts, read 713,705 times
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A coffee date is fine w/ me, I actually prefer it! I like how coffee tastes (well, good coffee, that is) and always love the smell. I'll just order decaf if it's in the afternoon. And most coffee shops have a small pastry selection, if you want a snack.
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Old 06-02-2014, 09:55 AM
 
Location: Sputnik Planitia
7,829 posts, read 11,796,338 times
Reputation: 9045
Quote:
Originally Posted by burgler09 View Post
I don't like coffee, so I'm giving it a no. I'd much rather get drinks.
alcohol can get very expensive... I had a drinks date with a woman once, not only did she have 5 cocktails at $14 a pop, she took the liberty without asking me to order dinner as well (at the bar - this could be risky as most waiters and bar staff will specifically encourage you to order food as well) and then ran up an almost $100 bill just for her share that I had to wind up paying This was a few years ago. I did not even like this woman very much and resented having to pay that kind of money on a first date with someone I wasn't even interested in.

After that experience I now think coffee dates are perfect as it limits the scope of the date incase your first impression of the other person isn't a good one.
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Old 06-02-2014, 10:00 AM
 
Location: Sputnik Planitia
7,829 posts, read 11,796,338 times
Reputation: 9045
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
I like them, because:

A. I like coffee
B. They're low pressure
C. They're casual
D. Nobody has to spend a ton of money

I suggested my first date with my husband, and it was to the coffee shop around the corner from my apartment (I already knew he was a coffee drinker). We were also drinking coffee there when we got engaged.
+1 I don't understand why people get all bent out of shape due to the low cost. Low cost on a first date is a good thing. The other person is a total stranger and for them to expect anything fancy is just showing a sense of entitlement. This is the same as me expecting the woman to come to the first date all decked out to the 10s.
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Old 06-02-2014, 10:04 AM
 
14,078 posts, read 16,620,773 times
Reputation: 17654
Quote:
Originally Posted by 14Bricks View Post
Going out anywhere and ordering just water or juice is lame. And I don't really drink tea either. Maybe if they have some hot chocolate(I don't know I don't go to coffee shops) but even that would be stupid seeing that we're already having 90's degree days were I live.
You're a difficult one, aren't you?

No, I agree though. The last time I met someone for coffee, I ordered iced green tea lemonade. If I want something hot, I get vanilla flavored steamed milk. Never coffee though.
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Old 06-02-2014, 10:33 AM
 
50,834 posts, read 36,538,623 times
Reputation: 76676
Quote:
Originally Posted by alaskaboy View Post
"coffee" is an excuse and wimps way out in my humble opinion. If you have corresponded enough to know there is enough interest to meet in person, then do something a little more then just having coffee. Take her to dinner, get some wine down her and see what kind of person she really is. Coffee on a Tuesday afternoon and 2:12pm in the afternoon is not going to show you that. Lots of times dates over "coffee", versus dinner and wine, end up being one and done because both people are more reserved and do not open up the same as they would for an evening date, over dinner with a drink or two.
I do it differently. I don't correspond a lot before I meet someone, as I feel chemistry and compatibility is best sensed in person. If the person doesn't ask to meet or talk on the phone within a couple e-mails, I suggest it, and if they don't step up then I move on. To me the coffee first meet for 30 minutes is much better way to check compatability than e-mails or phone. Again I think a first meet is not the same as a first date.
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Old 06-02-2014, 10:37 AM
 
2,516 posts, read 5,690,100 times
Reputation: 4672
Quote:
Originally Posted by iknowftbll View Post
Coffee dates as first dates especially are less about budgets and more about finding a safe and "low stakes" way to take that first step in a potential relationship. And like John13 said, you don't have to order coffee. What you drink is less important than just sitting down in a casual setting and breaking the ice. The goal is to see if there is potential for future dates, not actually enjoy a coffee.
^this

and coffee is awesome
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