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Would you tell someone who's overweight to "just stop" overeating? Something that's difficult to stop takes time and practice. I think a key step is to also work on stopping staring at women in media.
Consider that you're telling me to get rid of my sexuality, because I'm unattractive to the women I'm attracted to ( which is the majority of women my age by the way ), so that's not something that's easy to accomplish. You should have more compassion for me and less angry judgement.
Now, try to find something else to direct your attention to. You have a habit, the best way to drop a habit is by replacing that habit. Instead of staring at girls, stare at something else. Get a smartphone or a tablet and keep busy with that when you are walking around in public. Those are just some ideas.
...And quit feeling sorry for yourself. Find what it is that you don't like about yourself and do what you can to change it. This is coming from the poster child of self pity.
I used to believe that I was unattractive. As a matter of fact, I still believe that I have a little work left to do before I can consider myself attractive (even though quite a few women like what they see, but there was a time when they found me disgusting). I've decided that I no longer can sit around making excuses and pitying myself, I will move forward and do everything I can to better myself.
I'm not sure if those terms are completely made up nonsense. But I do agree they can be used as excuses often.
Oh I'm sure there's some truth to them. But I'm 50, no-one had a diagnosis back when I was young. And fewer people seemed so totally unable to relate to others. There was social cohesion, most people knew how to act appropriately around adults, women, children, old people. I am dismissive of these excuses for acting badly because I simply don't believe that so many people don't know what nice manners and good behaviour is.
That doesn't make sense. If they're gay, I definitely don't want a relationship with them. But, presumably some women would want to have a relationship with me.
If I don't want a stranger woman to do it to me, I shouldn't do it makes more sense.
No it makes perfect sense. That gay stranger doesn't know you are not interested and shouldn't assume you are. That male stranger staring at me doesn't know I am not interested and shouldn't assume I am. See how that works?
Now, try to find something else to direct your attention to. You have a habit, the best way to drop a habit is by replacing that habit. Instead of staring at girls, stare at something else. Get a smartphone or a tablet and keep busy with that when you are walking around in public. Those are just some ideas.
...And quit feeling sorry for yourself. Find what it is that you don't like about yourself and do what you can to change it. This is coming from the poster child of self pity.
I used to believe that I was unattractive. As a matter of fact, I still believe that I have a little work left to do before I can consider myself attractive (even though quite a few women like what they see, but there was a time when they found me disgusting). I've decided that I no longer can sit around making excuses and pitying myself, I will move forward and do everything I can to better myself.
Work towards something!
You sound quite self effacing. I don't need to make myself better for the sake of women, other than working on not staring. I'm good enough just as I am, except in areas that I want to improve for my own sake. I'm not harming women by existing as I am.
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