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Hopefully this thread can stay PG-13, although the title may already have exceeded those boundaries.
There's been some talk in various threads about how men classify women as someone who they would just sleep with, as opposed to someone with whom they would date and pursue a relationship.
I think women have these classifications as well, although we are less likely to pursue just sex vs a relationship. Maybe.
What makes the difference? Is it appearance? General attitude? Chemistry? Or something else that is undefinable but you know it in your gut?
I think, for me, it comes down to a certain chemistry. There are guys I know who I could say "okay, sleeping with him would probably be hot," yet I wouldn't pursue a relationship with them because our personalities wouldn't jive. It's not always about looks either; there are certain guys who may not be traditionally good looking, yet seem sexy to me. Still, I wouldn't pursue a relationship with them because our personalities wouldn't mesh.
However--and correct me if I am wrong, because I know this sounds sexist and I apologize beforehand--I have a sneaking suspicion that for most guys, it comes down to looks and they don't even think about the personality part of things.
Yes? No? Maybe so?
So I haven't read the entire thread, but I'm just going to post my thoughts here.
When I was single there really was a difference between "doable" and "datable".
Doable, I didnt really care about the girl's past, her goals for the future, what she did for a living, or anything like that. Doable means she looks good and I'd love to roll around in the hay with her. If that meant when we were done, then we were done, no big deal.
Datable, someone I could bring home to mom and dad. Someone that had goals, wasnt trash, and knew what they wanted in life. Oh, and a non smoker.
So I haven't read the entire thread, but I'm just going to post my thoughts here.
When I was single there really was a difference between "doable" and "datable".
Doable, I didnt really care about the girl's past, her goals for the future, what she did for a living, or anything like that. Doable means she looks good and I'd love to roll around in the hay with her. If that meant when we were done, then we were done, no big deal.
Datable, someone I could bring home to mom and dad. Someone that had goals, wasnt trash, and knew what they wanted in life. Oh, and a non smoker.
I don't understand this. So ultimately you're saying you would "roll in the hay" with her if she's trash? I just picture you rolling around in a dumpster. Not a good look. You should respect yourself and women more.
So I haven't read the entire thread, but I'm just going to post my thoughts here.
When I was single there really was a difference between "doable" and "datable".
Doable, I didnt really care about the girl's past, her goals for the future, what she did for a living, or anything like that. Doable means she looks good and I'd love to roll around in the hay with her. If that meant when we were done, then we were done, no big deal.
Datable, someone I could bring home to mom and dad. Someone that had goals, wasnt trash, and knew what they wanted in life. Oh, and a non smoker.
You hit the nail on the head...for me anyway. I am actually very suprised by the number of people on here that need to find someone dateable in order to do them. I agree that the qualities in a girl stated in your second paragraph have absolutely nothing to do with finding someone doable. I think you lose the fun factor when you start mixing the terms doable and dateable together.
One time in particular when I was young and single, I had a blind date with a smoking hot girl...the date was horrible, we had nothing in common, she was a complete snob and I couldnt wait for the date to be over. I ran into this girl a few months later at a party and ignored her, but somehow at the end of the night we ended up in bed and it was a blast. Never spoke to her again, but just from my experience you definitely do not have to be dateable in order to be doable
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth
No one but you seems to be having trouble in this thread. The rest of us are understanding each other pretty well.
Not true if you look at it. Multiple people questioned her statement.
She misunderstood the suffix "able".
Able: fit for or worthy of, or, capable of
If someone is "not doable" they are not fit for or worthy of having sex with, or you're not capable of having sex with them.
There is no reason to date someone (for most people) a that person isn't potentially worthy of having sex with, or you're not capable of having sex with, or they're not fit for sexin
That doesn't mean you'd have sex with everyone that you see as doable, but a person certainly would not have sex with someone that is not doable... so to most people, there is zero reason to date someone not doable.
Unless, of course, they don't understand the word. As happened here... so, the people that were understanding her were misusing the word at the same time. That often happens here.
Not true if you look at it. Multiple people questioned her statement.
She misunderstood the suffix "able".
Able: fit for or worthy of, or, capable of
If someone is "not doable" they are not fit for or worthy of having sex with, or you're not capable of having sex with them.
There is no reason to date someone (for most people) a that person isn't potentially worthy of having sex with, or you're not capable of having sex with, or they're not fit for sexin
That doesn't mean you'd have sex with everyone that you see as doable, but a person certainly would not have sex with someone that is not doable... so to most people, there is zero reason to date someone not doable.
Unless, of course, they don't understand the word. As happened here... so, the people that were understanding her were misusing the word at the same time. That often happens here.
Oh wow. I think we just have different interpretations of the word (which is totally fine since it's not a real word). "Doable" to me still means someone that I find very physically attractive and would enthusiastically want to be sexual with. I don't care how others are interpreting it because that's what it means to me.
I don't understand this. So ultimately you're saying you would "roll in the hay" with her if she's trash? I just picture you rolling around in a dumpster. Not a good look. You should respect yourself and women more.
I think you should re-read what I said.
I didn't say I would roll around in the hay with trash.
I did say I would roll around in the hay with someone that looks good, but doesn't have a lot of career goals or life goals. What does it matter if you're just sleeping with someone? Also, if I'm just sleeping with someone, then I'm not bringing them home to my family.
Someone that is datable is someone you can see a future with. For me that was someone who wanted the same things in life as me. After having sex with that person I'm still going to have a relationship with them.
I've had multiple chances were I could have tried for sex with a girl but decided not to because she was datable.
If i want sex with someone that's doable, then I'll make the move.
There's a big difference.
So come off of your holier than thou attitude about me having more respect for myself.
And stop this respect yourself and women better. Women do the same exact same thing to men.
Shallow personality + looks = not doable, not datable
Decent personality + looks = doable
Great personality + similar interests + similar goals + sexual chemistry = dateable
Of course the term "looks" is completely subjective.
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