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And the question is, why? What criteria makes him not think highly of her?
Appearance? Attitude? Some people had no problem answering this question.
It all centres around hypocrisy and double standards, where a guy is okay with putting his penis in a woman, but because they both engaged in that act together, he now views her as not worthy of a genuine relationship because she had sex with him. Yet he wouldn't want a relationship with her if she didn't "put out". Makes perfect sense, doesn't it.
To me, it has nothing to do with thinking highly of a person or not.
With someone I want to date I want the entire package. Physical attraction, chemistry, we get along in lifestyles, like talking to each other, doing things or not doing things (just chilling) with each other.
The doable side is a person I'm physically attracted to enough to have sex with and her with me.
It's that simple. There isn't anything "wrong" or anything that I don't think "highly" of... we're just not a match for a relationship.
That's fine. Not everything needs to be a serious relationship. That certainly goes both ways. I doubt many of the women that have taken me home or had a fling with me thought of me as boyfriend material either.
I appreciate your mature answer. You've demonstrated that it's not as black and white as others seem to think. Thank you.
I am sitting here shaking my head at this question.
Does there need to be an explanation in regards to this?
It's interesting to me that the two of you think the OP was asking for an explanation. They were asking for different people's opinions. This isn't a question that has a definitive or universal answer.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RogersParkGuy
"Dateable" vs. "Doable" is really just an updated phrasing of the old "madonna" vs. "w***e" dichotomy.
A "dateable" woman is usually a woman who is modest, submissive and sexually receptive. Datebable women are viewed as being worthy of consideration as full human beings.
A "doable" woman is usually a women who is boisterous, independent and sexually assertive. Doable women are viewed as sluts only worthy of being used and objectified.
The whole doable and datable concept does not apply to me at all.
At least I don't think so. I have never really been sexually attracted to someone I didn't have feelings for. Yeah I can look at a guy and say he's cute or really attractive or whatever the case may be, but if I don't have any real feelings for him like that I wouldn't think of him in a sexual way.
My friends say all things like "oh he's sexy, he can definitely get it." ALL the time. It just evades me lol.
Problem with this question : The definition is ever changing. Even if one says their definition is clear to them today, it will change with time. Nothing is forever doable or date able. Yes at one point in time men might go with criteria of their own like does she smoke or her age or whatever but in the end that same guy will see his definitions do not remain static. Bigger question is ; what makes a guy connect with a girl for more than sex. And answer is we don't know.
For me, doable is always dateable, but dateable is not always doable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 14Bricks
Wait, What?
She's saying she will date everyone she will do, but she will not do everyone she will date. This is not that unusual, particularly for women. Why the confusion?
Problem with this question : The definition is ever changing. Even if one says their definition is clear to them today, it will change with time. Nothing is forever doable or date able. Yes at one point in time men might go with criteria of their own like does she smoke or her age or whatever but in the end that same guy will see his definitions do not remain static. Bigger question is ; what makes a guy connect with a girl for more than sex. And answer is we don't know.
Excellent point. I think some may know why they connect with a girl for more than sex, but you're right--in many cases it's not something that they can put their finger on.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth
She's saying she will date everyone she will do, but she will not do everyone she will date. This is not that unusual, particularly for women. Why the confusion?
I don't know. I think that is pretty unusual for women. There aren't too many women I've ever met that will date a man they know they wouldn't want to sleep with.
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