Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Boise isn't what I consider to be a small city but I do live in a city of only about 100,000 so compared to my city its big.
Little off topic but just something to keep in mind. The more successful a woman is the harder time she has to find a guy because her standards raise. Most women want their man to be >= to them in success, you are no different. Nothing wrong with that and it is natural, but it obviously limits your dating pool. Since you make 6 digits you want to find a guy that also makes 6 digits or at least close to it. Compared to a woman that makes $50,000 who would be happy with a guy that makes $40,000+ your dating pool is less then half of hers.
Here is another thing to keep in mind. A guy making $100k+ is going to want an attractive wife that makes him feel good about himself. How much she makes will be secondary. The more he makes the less he cares how much you make, the more you make the more you care how much he makes. If you want a guy that makes $100k+ you better be spending some time in the gym as well as work.
You are becoming the kind of man you would like to marry. Successful, driven, and career oriented. While those attributes attract a woman to a man, they are not what attracts a man to a woman. In fact if a woman is too successful it can have the opposite effect and repel some men if they don't feel like they don't measure up to you. As you pursue your career keep in mind the kind of woman you need to be in order to land the kind of man you want. Young, attractive, good muscle tone, long hair, warm, affectionate, loving. Feminine qualities is what attracts most men.
Truth! It's sad that women try to turn this into pure one-upsmanship, but I'm not going to lose sleep over it.
I've said it before, but my parents (as are many others) aren't asking when I'll find that "one" that wants to go hiking, skiing and has her PhD and a six-digit income. They're asking when I'm going to bring a cute, cuddly future in-law to the next big family function while the siblings are wondering when they will see nieces and nephews. I don't listen to everything my folks say, but I'm down with that sentiment. Obviously, women find high status guys, such as lawyers, quite appealing. Fair enough. Problem? Those guys who get anywhere in life deal with equally ambitious a-holes daily. We don't care for equally ambitious a-holes at home, too. That's why women lawyers are single more often than not.
The young lady I befriended at the side job wants to be an engineer. That's fine, but I want a family sooner than later. She's got the rest of her life to be a wage slave. Not so much so in regards to making a family. When a guy thinks like that in regards to wanting a family, he's called an "overgrown teenager".
Quote:
Originally Posted by vision33r
It sounds more like you're looking for a business partner rather than a mate.
As a man, I can tell you that most men don't dig into a woman's background as deeply about these things. When a man talks to a woman they're looking for comfort and relief. We would rather talk intellectual things with other men.
I remember the last few dates where a woman challenged me intellectually it quickly ended our date. Not that I wasn't interested in our conversation, I lose sexual and intimate desires for this person.
Right. The problem with competitve women at times is that they don't know when to dial it down. It becomes a pissing match and it becomes time to hit the eject button on things. I dated a Russian import back when I was 19 or 20. Evidently, she was getting very acclimated to life in the USA, because everything was a contest to her before too long. She started getting uppity about how her future business degree (those are a dime a dozen now) was going to get her places. Yeah? Well, she didn't get as far as I did and she's fat after one kid.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sommie789
I think it is sexy when men talk intellectual things with women.
I love that, but see above.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChickenPox
I never understood why for some women the man has to make an equal income. If he looks good and has a great personality, who cares how much he earns at his job?
Equality. At least when it is self-serving/convenient.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmFest
Because he wasn't looking to be challenged and expected a casual, low-key conversation?
Who really likes a pissing contest? Wow. Masculine women lose again. Deservedly so, bro.
I've dated several women that we start talking about various topics such as politics, racism, world, etc. I've concluded when you're on a date. It's best not to dig too deeply in the topic. It's ok in a relationship to have different views but on a date it can be disaster.
A lot of women hate the feeling of being diminished intellectually by a guy. They have to win even if they are wrong. If I am wrong I don't have to win a debate on a date. To us guys we only care about getting laid and there's no need to debate about a matter.
Men and women have different views on different matters even in science. It's ok if I talk about these things when we're a couple but on a date it is best getting into less sticker issues.
The dating scene in Boise is really good. Much better than Houston and MUCH MUCH better than corpus Christi.
Are you slim and attractive? I only ask because you say that you want a guy that makes as much or more than you. Most guys in that income bracket date up in regards to looks, as men typically don't give a rip about your job or education despite what a few white knights might say on these boards. .......Real Talk
Truth! It's sad that women try to turn this into pure one-upsmanship, but I'm not going to lose sleep over it.
I've said it before, but my parents (as are many others) aren't asking when I'll find that "one" that wants to go hiking, skiing and has her PhD and a six-digit income. They're asking when I'm going to bring a cute, cuddly future in-law to the next big family function while the siblings are wondering when they will see nieces and nephews. I don't listen to everything my folks say, but I'm down with that sentiment. Obviously, women find high status guys, such as lawyers, quite appealing. Fair enough. Problem? Those guys who get anywhere in life deal with equally ambitious a-holes daily. We don't care for equally ambitious a-holes at home, too. That's why women lawyers are single more often than not.
Reality check: they're not competitive at home. Why would they be competitive off the job? That doesn't even make sense.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlfredB1979;
The young lady I befriended at the side job wants to be an engineer. That's fine, but I want a family sooner than later. She's got the rest of her life to be a wage slave. Not so much so in regards to making a family. When a guy thinks like that in regards to wanting a family, he's called an "overgrown teenager".
The women engineers and lawyers I know are able to be moms and hold down a job at the same time. It's not an issue. Sounds like you don't have much experience with women in the professions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlfredB1979;
Right. The problem with competitve women at times is that they don't know when to dial it down. It becomes a pissing match and it becomes time to hit the eject button on things. I dated a Russian import back when I was 19 or 20. Evidently, she was getting very acclimated to life in the USA, because everything was a contest to her before too long. She started getting uppity about how her future business degree (those are a dime a dozen now) was going to get her places. Yeah? Well, she didn't get as far as I did and she's fat after one kid.
More reality check. Your russky gf's competitiveness had nothing to do with becoming acclimated to the US. The US is laid back compared to Russia. Russian career women are insanely competitive, and will stop at nothing to get ahead, and trample whoever they need to trample to get where they want. They're downright scary. There's a lot of mythology floating around the West re: what Russian women are like. Of course, like any nationality, they're all different, anyway. Not all are driven career types.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlfredB1979;
Who really likes a pissing contest? Wow. Masculine women lose again. Deservedly so, bro.
So, if she wants a good paycheck to support herself, she's "masculine". But if she doesn't, and ends up marrying a guy who makes more, she's "hypergamous" and a "gold-digger"? Or "lazy" and a "leech" because she's ok with being a SAHM? Great. That makes perfect sense.
Like other human beings, women have the right to develop their talents as much as they want. If their interests and talents lie in technical skills, like engineering or IT tech, or in law, or medicine, why should anyone care? Let people do what makes them happy. If you can't handle it, look for other women. To each his/her own.
If the OP is young, then launching her career with maximum tempo and dedication is probably more important than chasing dating-opportunities. As she gets older, priorities might shift.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rumpa
I'd say you have just as much chance in the smaller cities.
We've had ample evidence on this Forum, including several testaments in this very thread, of how geography matters. For the "generic" person the opportunities may be fairly uniform, but for professionals - especially those with secular/unorthodox values - coastal/urban locales are reputedly far more promising.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leisesturm
When they hook up eventually, it fails, finding someone isn't the hard part. Any driven six figure professional can pull that off. If the o.p. was capable of it she would have done it already.
Many professionals, executives, business-owners and the like, sport ample soft-skills in the prosecution of their professional tasks, but can not convey these skills towards the dating scene. It's entirely possible for an eloquent and nimble courtroom litigator to be stifled and painfully reticent in a bar (no pun intended).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leisesturm
Six figures puts you in the 1% but its hardly as high as you can go. ...
$100K is hardly 1%. Maybe $400K. And then there's the question of net-worth, vs. mere annual salary.
My point isn't to quibble over dollar-figures, but to point out that the OP's requirements are hardly stratospherically high. One can debate the wisdom of having material criteria, and indeed much can be said for being more flexible and more tolerant. But the OP's numerical objectives, were she too cling to them, aren't untoward or rare.
Quote:
Originally Posted by vision33r
It sounds more like you're looking for a business partner rather than a mate.
As a man, I can tell you that most men don't dig into a woman's background as deeply about these things. When a man talks to a woman they're looking for comfort and relief. We would rather talk intellectual things with other men.
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742
Woah, you do not speak for all or most men. Not even close.
To what has the world come? Timberline and I finally agree on something!!!
Responding to Vision33r: speaking personally, a "business partner" is precisely the sort of think that I'd seek in marriage. If it's strictly romance, it's not a marriage. But even within mere romance, mutual intellectual challenge is absolutely imperative. And even in "business", I could not long abide a partner with whom we'd be an intellectual mismatch.
This may not count for much... but I once took a job for reasons other than what I really wanted to do. I chose a location where my wife would be happy near her family. It ruined our relationship. After a year, I hated work so much I would almost throw up arriving at my job. We eventually left and our relationship started to improve, but she always brings up how angry I could get, and that was all because of working a a job I hated.... just a thought.
The dating scene in Boise is really good. Much better than Houston and MUCH MUCH better than corpus Christi.
Are you slim and attractive? I only ask because you say that you want a guy that makes as much or more than you. Most guys in that income bracket date up in regards to looks, as men typically don't give a rip about your job or education despite what a few white knights might say on these boards. .......Real Talk
That goes a bit too far, IMHO. In my observation, job and education are still important women's attributes to accomplished men, but looks often supersede these, especially when the man is also at least moderately attractive. Just look at the accomplished men around you. It's easy to see.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
]
When a guy thinks like that in regards to wanting a family, he's called an "overgrown teenager". 
