How should I tell my parents that my boyfriend has a bad past
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"sanitized" to say the least. I've never seen theft of a firearm be treated as a midemenor, with light county time from a district court be all that happens. Ever. And I've seen quite a few such charges leveled and sentenced. All involved prison time. The big house. The lightest sentence I remember was five years. A whole nickel. And that was a "first offense". Here in NV, and I know in other states as well, any crime involving a firearm doubles the sentence. So, larceny for stealing , say, tools, that would be maybe 2 years, or maybe just county time, will be 4-5 in prison if a firearm is the stolen item. Actually using that gun in a crime, sayy bye bye to life outside bars and razor wire for at least 10, or selling said firearm that then gets used in a crime, same thing.
Its a safe assumption most DAs and judges would assume sale of the stolen gun as a motive, as well, when considering sentence. Firearm crimes are no twinky thing. Even being an accessory to theft of a gun carries the same weight as if one actually stole it. Stolen guns gets ATF involved more often than not. A federal agency with zero sense of humor and a total lackof mercy. They would give Mother Theresa , herself, a dime bit for stolen wweapons.
Especially with a prior. And then, getting popped a third time, for drugs, after a firearm crime conviction? Sheesh, may as well have taken a shot at the judge. I've never, ever, seen a repeat offender, with drugs and guns involved, get off as light as the OP describes his story. Maybe if he was a juvey when he did it. Idk. But some things missing. Got me scratching my head....
He returned the firearm to the owner. He was going to pawn it for money which was why he stole it. Once he was caught he gave it back to the owner. I also had the sequencing wrong. He served time for marijuana for four months when he was 18. About 2 years later he broke into his school and got probation and a year after that he broke into car got a firearm and a purse and he also got probation for that.
He returned the firearm to the owner. He was going to pawn it for money which was why he stole it. Once he was caught he gave it back to the owner. I also had the sequencing wrong. He served time for marijuana for four months when he was 18. About 2 years later he broke into his school and got probation and a year after that he broke into car got a firearm and a purse and he also got probation for that.
Once he got caught? OK, so, he knew the *** was up, so he returned it before he was taken into custody and the cops never had him in possession of the gun? The owner didn't file charges? He was 18 when he did the 4 months for drugs, and broke into "his school" two years later? So he was still in high school at 20, crowding 21, or this was a college? Hmmm...and surely be just have known pawn shops run the ser# on firearms through NCIC? Or is that how he got caught?
I'm at a loss with all this. I can't offer any advice really, except to say, if this is how has related all this to you, he's not being truthful. and is sandbagging you. But, ya know, all of his history with the law is a matter of public record. You could see it all, yourself, in black and white, with a trip to the courthouse. Thus goeth any doubts and convoluted testimony given you. The truth can, indeed, set you free...
Sweetie, whether you realize or not, you have a MAJOR self-esteem problem and should not be dating anyone right now, much less this guy. You are a college educated woman of faith who comes from a strong family unit (based on your post). Please respect yourself and don't date any guy who is not worthy of your time and attention. And NO SEX. Even with protection - you do not want to risk the chance of tethering yourself to a former felon who does drugs for the next 18 years.
Listen to the warning signs your giving --> Dating someone because "he fell in love with you" or because "you're a positive influence and can help him" or because "it's too late to date someone else" all scream low self-esteem. There are literally millions of men who have never stolen, done drugs, or have a rap sheet. Men who are educated and looking for a smart, kind woman to build a life with. Don't settle for this guy. In a 4-month old relationship, you should be smiling from ear-to-ear and wanting to tell your family and friends all about how wonderful he his- not keeping secrets from your parents and hoping he won't go back to jail for violating probation.
Lastly, since you are a Christian you have probably heard about the importantance of being "equally yoked" in a dating relationship. This guy is not your equal. He is following you to church, not leading you and encouraging you in your Christian walk.
This relationship is doomed for so many reasons. Please just break it off with him now and spend sometime loving yourself. The faster you get out of a relationship with the wrong person, the faster you'll be on the journey to finding the right one.
Well - I see my original post was deleted; despite pretty much saying, in so many words what nearly everyone else has said.
So - OP, here are some more detailed thoughts:
Don't become a statistic...think about and picture what future you see with this man 5 or 10 years from now...absolutely do NOT have a child with him anytime soon...do NOT marry him until both of you already have stable careers...
So, what do you hope to gain from this site? Are you seeking some sort of justification for dating this guy?
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