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I’ve had about 4 dating app dates this past month and none have resulted in a second date or at least a follow up text initiated by the guy. Some the dates I posted about, 2 out the 4 dates I would’ve been willing to go on a second date with the guy. I just don’t get what I’m doing wrong here? My pics are up to date, I try to be funny, nice and engaging on the date whether I’m into the guy or not. Three out of the 4 dates I even sent a text when I got home thanking my date, I get some half hearted response (if that) and then crickets. The last date I had this past Friday seemed pretty into me (more so than I was into him), paying me compliments and stuff. Didn’t seem like he was just saying it to get in my pants either cause he didn’t even try to kiss me at the end of the night. Sent him a text that night when I got home thanking him for dinner, got some half hearted response from him as well. It’s so strange because people I work with and people in my life in general always say how guy must be falling all over me and I must have them lining up to date me, and that couldn’t be farther from reality! I can’t even get a date to text me back lol! And I can assure I’m not some needy clingy girl who talks about the future and how I want kids and marriage on these dates. I always keep it light and fun. I guess I’m just venting but i can’t help but feel I’m doing something wrong!
A few years ago I was on a dating app as well, but for every 4 dates I had on average 3 would follow up and 2 resulted in at least a second date. My personality hasn’t changed since then, neither have my looks by much other than I’m in better shape now then I was then, maybe have a few more fine lines on my face but that’s it.
Am I being unreasonable in expecting that at least one out of these four dates statistically should have resulted in some type of follow up?
I’ve had about 4 dating app dates this past month and none have resulted in a second date or at least a follow up text initiated by the guy. Some the dates I posted about, 2 out the 4 dates I would’ve been willing to go on a second date with the guy. I just don’t get what I’m doing wrong here? My pics are up to date, I try to be funny, nice and engaging on the date whether I’m into the guy or not. Three out of the 4 dates I even sent a text when I got home thanking my date, I get some half hearted response (if that) and then crickets. The last date I had this past Friday seemed pretty into me (more so than I was into him), paying me compliments and stuff. Didn’t seem like he was just saying it to get in my pants either cause he didn’t even try to kiss me at the end of the night. Sent him a text that night when I got home thanking him for dinner, got some half hearted response from him as well. It’s so strange because people I work with and people in my life in general always say how guy must be falling all over me and I must have them lining up to date me, and that couldn’t be farther from reality! I can’t even get a date to text me back lol! And I can assure I’m not some needy clingy girl who talks about the future and how I want kids and marriage on these dates. I always keep it light and fun. I guess I’m just venting but i can’t help but feel I’m doing something wrong!
A few years ago I was on a dating app as well, but for every 4 dates I had on average 3 would follow up and 2 resulted in at least a second date. My personality hasn’t changed since then, neither have my looks by much other than I’m in better shape now then I was then, maybe have a few more fine lines on my face but that’s it.
We don’t know you or these guys, so there’s really no way that we can say what might be going wrong. I have a few coworkers who met their husbands on dating sites so it would seem like they had luck with it, but it doesn’t mean that they did everything right or that they were any more desirable than you are. Some things just work out for some people, but not for others.
We don’t know you or these guys, so there’s really no way that we can say what might be going wrong. I have a few coworkers who met their husbands on dating sites so it would seem like they had luck with it, but it doesn’t mean that they did everything right or that they were any more desirable than you are. Some things just work out for some people, but not for others.
Unfortunately this is my only way to meet someone. I’ve worked with the same people for 8 years so not going to meet anyone at work. All my friends are married and have kids so I don’t have anyone to really go out with and meet people. I’ve had occasional introductions through friends but they’ve never worked out either, other than once. I did join a salsa dance studio for a while a few years ago and met people there, but unfortunately got a knee injury that prevents me from doing that type of dancing.
I’ve had about 4 dating app dates this past month and none have resulted in a second date or at least a follow up text initiated by the guy. Some the dates I posted about, 2 out the 4 dates I would’ve been willing to go on a second date with the guy. I just don’t get what I’m doing wrong here? My pics are up to date, I try to be funny, nice and engaging on the date whether I’m into the guy or not. Three out of the 4 dates I even sent a text when I got home thanking my date, I get some half hearted response (if that) and then crickets. The last date I had this past Friday seemed pretty into me (more so than I was into him), paying me compliments and stuff. Didn’t seem like he was just saying it to get in my pants either cause he didn’t even try to kiss me at the end of the night. Sent him a text that night when I got home thanking him for dinner, got some half hearted response from him as well. It’s so strange because people I work with and people in my life in general always say how guy must be falling all over me and I must have them lining up to date me, and that couldn’t be farther from reality! I can’t even get a date to text me back lol! And I can assure I’m not some needy clingy girl who talks about the future and how I want kids and marriage on these dates. I always keep it light and fun. I guess I’m just venting but i can’t help but feel I’m doing something wrong!
A few years ago I was on a dating app as well, but for every 4 dates I had on average 3 would follow up and 2 resulted in at least a second date. My personality hasn’t changed since then, neither have my looks by much other than I’m in better shape now then I was then, maybe have a few more fine lines on my face but that’s it.
Don't beat yourself up OP. If you were being yourself, then you weren't doing anything wrong. Just because someone hasn't felt enough chemistry to continue doesn't imply you did something wrong.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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You are showing you are emotionally available and open. That’s all you can do. Sometimes there is just a slump for even those who do well in dating. These guys just didn’t feel it. It is not necessarily a reflection of your efforts.
Consider working with a dating coach. Also, there used to be a book called The Rules for Online Dating, I read that before I met my now spouse in an online dating site.
At least five or six people pointed out that when he went to kiss you, you turned your cheek, and that is a very clear sign of disinterest. They said to counter that, you would have to ask him out. Texting “I had a nice time” doesn’t counter that and could be easily chalked up to you being kind and polite. But you didn’t do it. You refused.
If you really want another date with him, be brave and ask! Worst he can say is no, and then you’re exactly where you are now, so no loss.
You ask what you are doing wrong? In this particular instance with that particular guy it’s passivity. You can do it!
Unfortunately this is my only way to meet someone. I’ve worked with the same people for 8 years so not going to meet anyone at work. All my friends are married and have kids so I don’t have anyone to really go out with and meet people. I’ve had occasional introductions through friends but they’ve never worked out either, other than once. I did join a salsa dance studio for a while a few years ago and met people there, but unfortunately got a knee injury that prevents me from doing that type of dancing.
Yeah I understand that it’s an easy way to meet people, but after 15 years of mediocre dates, I think I’m done with it. Also, I keep watching movies about human trafficking which scares me off from wanting to continue to meet men online. Oh, and I asked someone who I love and respect very much for dating advice and he told me to just stop looking and do my own thing, so that’s what I’ve been doing.
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