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l never understand any of this so called dating stuff that gets around in threads like this.
And movies and rubbish , do people really take any notice of that stuff, really. lf movies and the actors in them were normal everyday reality they probably wouldn't be very entertaining .yaknow.
All this looks stuff in these threads you guys must all live Hollywood or something bc most couples on any street or shopping mall out in the real world- are all just ordinary people. The guys aren't gonna be some taunt 6ft whatever and she's not gonna look like a movie star or centerfold, both far far from it usually.
There'd be lucky to be 10% if that in most worlds and couples that even come ball park to fitting the way people talk in these threads, the other 90% are just ordinary people in all shapes and sizes and looks and guess what most of them are coupled up.
Hell there's prob only 5 or 10% of people male or females in these forums talking all that stuff that are even remotely close to all these standards people go on about.
l dunno , most must be just shooting way way way above of their weight to be talking like that,
I'm a normal person, average height, there is nothing I can do outside of going to the gym or making more money that's going to make me more attractive. I cannot make myself 6'2", give myself a chiseled jawline, etc. I work with a few men who I could easily "compete with" but I also work with other men who I would have no chance against if we were pursing the same woman. I'm talking about guys who could be male fitness models or NBA players.
So what is my solution: travel. I cannot change the western expectations of male attractiveness but I can travel to places where those standards don't apply or women don't care about them. My ex-wife was a 6'0" Romanian, she did not care that she was taller than me. As an example.
I do not believe that you should be single or lonely if you don't want to be. I believed that you can use your resources to find people or a place that will accept you for what you can control. Maybe having a spouse is out of the question for some, but certainly not having a lifelong companion or partner.
But then when you travel far and abroad to find these other women who behave differently, what you’ll have to do is stay there with them right? Or is it really the height factor and not that some men have the means to travel to different countries to pull women from oppression? Because why else are they choosing you over men in their own country if not for money and opportunity?
It’s not getting harder for some men to find wives because of their height, the average height of men hasn’t changed has it?
I'm a normal person, average height, there is nothing I can do outside of going to the gym or making more money that's going to make me more attractive. I cannot make myself 6'2", give myself a chiseled jawline, etc. I work with a few men who I could easily "compete with" but I also work with other men who I would have no chance against if we were pursing the same woman. I'm talking about guys who could be male fitness models or NBA players.
So what is my solution: travel. I cannot change the western expectations of male attractiveness but I can travel to places where those standards don't apply or women don't care about them. My ex-wife was a 6'0" Romanian, she did not care that she was taller than me. As an example.
I do not believe that you should be single or lonely if you don't want to be. I believed that you can use your resources to find people or a place that will accept you for what you can control. Maybe having a spouse is out of the question for some, but certainly not having a lifelong companion or partner.
Or you could find women who don't care about the stereotypical standards of male attractiveness here at home. There are plenty that don't. The question then arises: what are your standards in a mate? Perhaps you're not interested in the women who look past superficialities, and would love you for the person you are. It sounds like the real reason you travel abroad, is that you want the stereotypical E European babe.
This is a another big reason why I was never really comfortable with dating. It feels way too forced and phony. Because you literally cannot control the main part of what drives people to want a relationship with you: Attraction, chemistry, connection, and timing. After learning what manipulation and control looks like I kind of started to see a lot of what people were doing as to get dates as almost gross in a way. I've had so many people project their desires onto me under the guise of "trying to get me to open up and give them a shot," I just get annoyed by the whole thing. It's not genuine or organic to me. And eventually it just felt like everyone was trying to control my feelings. And what makes it worse is that people don't know they're being manipulative or they don't see it as a problem because our society has built a whole dating culture on being manipulative, which is wild to me. We've literally demonized being friends with people of the opposite sex with concepts like the "friendzone." When that is arguably one of the most natural ways for relationships form. It's nuts.
You're right; some people, maybe a lot of people, do project qualities they want onto complete strangers, based on appearance. This is one reason why meeting people through shared activities, groups, classes, etc. can work better. People have an opportunity to observe the personalities of the people one is participating in whatever activity with. They're not a blank slate to project fantasies onto.
And yes, it is annoying when others make assumptions about who you are based on very superficial and fleeting observations. It seems strange, but maybe to a certain extent, it's human nature. But still, after a couple of decades of life, you'd expect people to have more common sense or wisdom about that.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 09-14-2022 at 12:49 PM..
But then when you travel far and abroad to find these other women who behave differently, what you’ll have to do is stay there with them right? Or is it really the height factor and not that some men have the means to travel to different countries to pull women from oppression? Because why else are they choosing you over men in their own country if not for money and opportunity?
It’s not getting harder for some men to find wives because of their height, the average height of men hasn’t changed has it?
I think it has.It seems each generation is getting taller.
Social media/dating apps has also made it more superficial to where short men are mocked and height has become more and more a priority in the dating world
Amazing how we can point out reality in these threads and it's just conveniently missed.
lf it's height some guys are worried about l'd suggest yet again, just go and look out onto any busy street or crowd. There's usually more if anything of just everyday but shorter guys with partners. There's not even that many tall guys out there in my world.
For the umpteenth time, people, we are NOT going to have another discussion about height. This thread is now closed.
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