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Old 09-06-2008, 09:34 AM
 
560 posts, read 1,465,478 times
Reputation: 595

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Hi Guys...My brother got married 2 years ago to his high-school sweetheart. Although they like each other, they fight all the time. Recently, my brother met this girl whom he swears is the girl of his dreams in so many ways. He has only known her for a year but he can't stop talking about her. They have not been intimate with each other, according to him because she would not involve herself with a married guy. What a classy gal! Anyway, he insists he really wants to leave his wife and marry this girl he has so many things in common with. The question is, should he leave his wife whom he does not love to be with the girl he REALLY wants?
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Old 09-06-2008, 09:44 AM
 
8,413 posts, read 37,514,750 times
Reputation: 6329
He doesnt really want her. He wants something thats free and clear without fighting.
So for now thats her.

I think its a bad idea for the girl

Who knows when he will getbored of her. Your bro needs to grow up and suck it up and fix it at home before tossing it off. Thats really lame. Everyone fights in REAL relationships. Mature people get over it and dont do disfunctional things like cheating or leaving over not agreeing on things.
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Old 09-06-2008, 10:29 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma
288 posts, read 615,266 times
Reputation: 166
Quote:
Originally Posted by tatiana1 View Post
Hi Guys...My brother got married 2 years ago to his high-school sweetheart. Although they like each other, they fight all the time. Recently, my brother met this girl whom he swears is the girl of his dreams in so many ways. He has only known her for a year but he can't stop talking about her. They have not been intimate with each other, according to him because she would not involve herself with a married guy. What a classy gal! Anyway, he insists he really wants to leave his wife and marry this girl he has so many things in common with. The question is, should he leave his wife whom he does not love to be with the girl he REALLY wants?
Grass isn't always greener on the other side. If he's going to leave his wife, maybe he should try being alone and casually date. If they were high school sweethearts he may be in the "can't be alone" mode. No need to jump right back in something serious.

Hope it all works out for him.
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Old 09-06-2008, 11:21 AM
 
Location: Incognito
7,005 posts, read 19,883,502 times
Reputation: 5490
What if he divorces his wife and marries this new girl of his dreams. Then six months later he meets another girl of his dreams. Then what? Is he going to go on like this all his life?
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Old 09-06-2008, 12:04 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
16,224 posts, read 24,086,474 times
Reputation: 24069
He needs to sit down with his wife, and have a serious heart to heart.
They need to find out why they fight all the time, etc. and can their marriage be fixed? He obviously doesn`t want it to be fixed, if he has high hopes for another woman! No wonder they are fighting all the time.
Hhmmmmm..... its not fair for his wife to be in this marriage, if he puts all of his time, effort, and energy into a fantasy dream of another woman.

If he wants out of this marriage, in order to jump right in to another, then maybe he should ask for a divorce, so his wife can move on with her life.
Then maybe she can find someone who will be willing to put effort into her marriage, not into another woman. Tell him Good luck!
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Old 09-06-2008, 12:51 PM
 
Location: Florida
7,269 posts, read 9,904,792 times
Reputation: 6029
Quote:
Originally Posted by tatiana1 View Post
Hi Guys...My brother got married 2 years ago to his high-school sweetheart. Although they like each other, they fight all the time. Recently, my brother met this girl whom he swears is the girl of his dreams in so many ways. He has only known her for a year but he can't stop talking about her. They have not been intimate with each other, according to him because she would not involve herself with a married guy. What a classy gal! Anyway, he insists he really wants to leave his wife and marry this girl he has so many things in common with. The question is, should he leave his wife whom he does not love to be with the girl he REALLY wants?
Yes. Why go through life miserable? Wouldn't be fair to his wife anyway with his heart with another. The worst sort of cheating, in my opinion, is emotional cheating. I feel when that comes into play, it's already doomed.
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Old 09-06-2008, 01:40 PM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,607 posts, read 38,672,453 times
Reputation: 13405
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Cat View Post
What if he divorces his wife and marries this new girl of his dreams. Then six months later he meets another girl of his dreams. Then what? Is he going to go on like this all his life?
Yeah - that's what I was thinking too! It will be a process that just repeats itself because there is ALWAYS going to be someone "from your dreams" out there. The thing is - he is always going to find them while he's married to the last "big dream".

Your bro needs to be alone for a while and get to know who he is before he ruins other people's lives.
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Old 09-06-2008, 01:48 PM
 
28,900 posts, read 50,288,838 times
Reputation: 46364
The grass is always greener. I think your brother needs to grow up and be a man in the emotional sense, not just the physical sense. As his sister, you need to slap him, tell him to suck it up and stop letting his little head do all the thinking for him.

And this speaks to an earlier post. When you marry at a young age, more times than not it ends with sorrow.
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Old 09-06-2008, 03:32 PM
 
Location: NPR, FL
33 posts, read 92,867 times
Reputation: 24
Sounds like there are bigger issues here. He wouldn't be so gaga over this girl if things were great with his wife. He also has no idea how he and girl2 would be together. What if they are totally incompatible? Either way this guy needs to get his feelings straight.
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Old 09-06-2008, 07:59 PM
 
355 posts, read 1,319,445 times
Reputation: 177
regardless of the other girl, if he doesnt love his wife, he shouldnt be wasting her time!!!!!!!
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