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Man. That's too bad. I had a friend like that who went bad. It was like watching a train wreck, and there was nothing I could do about it. He just wouldn't listen to me or anybody else. Went to prison eventually. Don't know what happened to him. He's probably dead now.
It seems like we all have one of these friends, unfortunately. Mine was one of my closest high school friends, I am not sure if I'd call him a genius but he was darn close. The guy was incredibly intelligent. He wouldn't ever have to study much for tests, it just came very easily to him. On math tests he was always the last one finished because he rarely studied, but he would actually derive the equations on the test before he started solving problems, because he was too lazy to just memorize the equations. Yet he would always be able to figure out the equations based on other information he knew, and then derive them, solve the problems, and ace the tests. It was insane, haha, it was almost like he intentionally made the tests harder on himself. He nearly had a 4.0 in high school and despite being a small guy, he was muscular for his size and a backup on the football team (that won state while we were there).
Then in college, he was fine the first year, he drank a good amount but who doesn't in college? He was an engineering major and was working really hard, also getting a 4.0 in a good number of credits. But when I transfered to the same university for the second year and got a quad with him, that was the first year he started showing signs that things were wrong. He locked himself away and studied, but turned to smoking a lot of weed. Pretty soon weed became various other odd drugs (peyote, woodrow seeds, stuff I hadn't really heard of much before). He dropped out of college in the second term, after a bout of basically going totally crazy. He started talking in rhymes, which was downright impressive I have to admit, it was so eerie, and then he sent an inappropriate e-mail to everyone he knew including all of our professors (he had then been taking philosophy classes with me before eventually switching to psychology). I left for home one weekend for four days, but when I got back he was gone. My other quadmate told me his parents had come to pick him up and take him home. He was out of contact with pretty much everyone for at least a month. He didn't return to college until the next year, having lost out on two terms total. Then he came back the next year but sometime later that year, he had another drug-related incident and dropped out again, this time going to a mental hospital for 30 days. He later returned and finally completed college in what was his 7th year I guess, after several major changes.
I've seen him about once a year for the past few years. The amount of drugs he has gotten into increased a lot, to shrooms, acid, mescaline, and a few others, fortunately no cocaine or heroine, he mostly avoids the harder stuff. But his mind is fried, honestly. He makes no sense when he talks most of the time, though he thinks he does, and he writes long essays about subjects that somehow relate drugs, psychology, religion, etc. into one big cluster of random thoughts that doesn't make sense to anyone but him. It's just kind of sad because he was one of the really smart kids with a promising future and although now he has his stuff together more so than before, I mean he is apparently pursuing teaching work in psychology, he will never be the same guy we had so many good times with as part of our group of friends back in the day. A roadside casualty, I guess.
Generally it's been the seriously traumatic things in life that have really changed my outlook. Every time it seems my faith and outlook on life got a little bit stronger.
After you go through the bad things, there's really nothing else that can get to you. At least you're alive, and the world is still beautiful. However, that's kind of hard to communicate to people. Freedom, I've found, is the best way to keep spirits up. Leave her alone, show her you care, and let her know you're there for her if she needs.
I worked at a long term care and head injury facility for a number of years. Being there really made me appreciate the little things in life that most take for granted. Many of our residents were young, some had debilitating diseases, others were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. The idea that they no longer have any freedom and are reliant on others for things like going to the bathroom, eating, etc., really gave me a different perspective on life.
If he was such a good friend why did you let him go to waste?
I really dislike the selfish and arrogant attitude most college people have. It disgusts me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonathanLB
It seems like we all have one of these friends, unfortunately. Mine was one of my closest high school friends, I am not sure if I'd call him a genius but he was darn close. The guy was incredibly intelligent. He wouldn't ever have to study much for tests, it just came very easily to him. On math tests he was always the last one finished because he rarely studied, but he would actually derive the equations on the test before he started solving problems, because he was too lazy to just memorize the equations. Yet he would always be able to figure out the equations based on other information he knew, and then derive them, solve the problems, and ace the tests. It was insane, haha, it was almost like he intentionally made the tests harder on himself. He nearly had a 4.0 in high school and despite being a small guy, he was muscular for his size and a backup on the football team (that won state while we were there).
Then in college, he was fine the first year, he drank a good amount but who doesn't in college? He was an engineering major and was working really hard, also getting a 4.0 in a good number of credits. But when I transfered to the same university for the second year and got a quad with him, that was the first year he started showing signs that things were wrong. He locked himself away and studied, but turned to smoking a lot of weed. Pretty soon weed became various other odd drugs (peyote, woodrow seeds, stuff I hadn't really heard of much before). He dropped out of college in the second term, after a bout of basically going totally crazy. He started talking in rhymes, which was downright impressive I have to admit, it was so eerie, and then he sent an inappropriate e-mail to everyone he knew including all of our professors (he had then been taking philosophy classes with me before eventually switching to psychology). I left for home one weekend for four days, but when I got back he was gone. My other quadmate told me his parents had come to pick him up and take him home. He was out of contact with pretty much everyone for at least a month. He didn't return to college until the next year, having lost out on two terms total. Then he came back the next year but sometime later that year, he had another drug-related incident and dropped out again, this time going to a mental hospital for 30 days. He later returned and finally completed college in what was his 7th year I guess, after several major changes.
I've seen him about once a year for the past few years. The amount of drugs he has gotten into increased a lot, to shrooms, acid, mescaline, and a few others, fortunately no cocaine or heroine, he mostly avoids the harder stuff. But his mind is fried, honestly. He makes no sense when he talks most of the time, though he thinks he does, and he writes long essays about subjects that somehow relate drugs, psychology, religion, etc. into one big cluster of random thoughts that doesn't make sense to anyone but him. It's just kind of sad because he was one of the really smart kids with a promising future and although now he has his stuff together more so than before, I mean he is apparently pursuing teaching work in psychology, he will never be the same guy we had so many good times with as part of our group of friends back in the day. A roadside casualty, I guess.
" Has there been an event in your life that changed your outlook?"
At my age (60+) there have been so many life-changing events I can't count them. Probably the one that stands out most is when the doctor told me I probably wouldn't survive an upcoming surgery, and even if I did, I probably wouldn't live long. He was wrong, but it changed how I lived life. The sudden, unexpected death of my late wife enforced my outlook. No more "work hard so you can retire comfortably" for me. Live for today; there may not be a tomorrow.
Only problem, now that I'm at retirement age... can I borrow a dime?
I am fine. Now I champion survivorship. Also lend an ear to those who have going through the cancer journey.
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Whew, that was easy!
