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I didn't read all the posts either, but, for what it's still worth, I would forfeit security and go with your soul mate.
I've seen this happen a handful of occasions with neighbors and friends (who share info) who married for security or whatever and their marriages are stale and lifeless.....basically they are just existing under the same roof going their separate ways most of the time, totally lame sex life, and no closeness. In one of these cases, the woman is hooking up with men on the side.....
I didn't read all the posts either, but, for what it's still worth, I would forfeit security and go with your soul mate.
I've seen this happen a handful of occasions with neighbors and friends (who share info) who married for security or whatever and their marriages are stale and lifeless.....basically they are just existing under the same roof going their separate ways most of the time, totally lame sex life, and no closeness. In one of these cases, the woman is hooking up with men on the side.....
What a *****
But really who chooses love anymore? I know I wouldn't.
I think she should dump both of them and start fresh with some new hunnies!
I agree.
We have a saying: "Es mejor estar sola que mal acompanada."
Translation: It's better to be alone than in bad company.
Not saying your bf or ex for that matter are bad. But you're clearly not truly happy. If you were you wouldn't be thinking about another man. And you certainly wouldn't be on here looking for someone to tell you only what you want to hear.
Seems to me that you're looking for a way out. And IMHO you're only fooling yourself if you think you'll find that happiness with your ex. He'll end up being your bandaid and you'll be right back where you started only flipped. Take time away from both and be happy with you first.
So, after debating this for a long, long while, I picked the best, most important person in this situation. Me. I realized a lot (with all your help!!) since my original post...mainly that I wasn't ready for forever. I couldn't hurt my (ex)fiance by going into a marriage with doubts...so we called it off. We're still friends and talk often, but I have my space to really feel things out. He knows about my doubts and all the ex drama....THAT was rough. But I'm glad we talked about it, because I could have made a HUGE mistake. Sounds dumb, but i really do appreciate the advice(hurtful and helpful!)...thanks guys!
So, as suggested by many, I'm a single woman and im much better for it.
but hey, i've got my debt to keep me warm
OOPS! I just read this! teehee Sorry, I hadn't gone that far back in the threads. Anyways...
GOOD FOR YOU!!!
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and im much better for it. 
