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I had no idea I was so neurotic, so ugly, such a loser!
I can't thank you paragons of manhood for pointing it out to me!
Thanks very much!
I'd better get out there and find me a husband pronto before I am destined to live my life in mediocrity for all eternity! I wonder if that bloke that asked me way back, the one that turned out to be a world travelled, high flying alcoholic is still interested? He'd do! Wouldn't he? I mean we could be married, so I'd have cred and be socially acceptable and he'd be hammered most of the time so I wouldn't see much of him anyway.
We can't have people running around thinking less of me for being unwed at 40. I can't cope with that kind of rejection.
That could be, but also it could be either the easy way out or they don't have interests in pursuing romantic relationships.
Going out there and making an effort to go on dates does require you to put yourself out there a lot. Who likes to be rejected? I know I don't. And I suspect no one else likes to be rejected either. I understand it's part of the game as I reject women as well, but some people just don't want to bother.
And for some they can't be bothered with romantic relationships or sex. For whatever reason they have their priorities elsewhere.
Good point.
And ya know what? If they're happy then it really doesn't matter.
I had no idea I was so neurotic, so ugly, such a loser!
I can't thank you paragons of manhood for pointing it out to me!
Thanks very much!
I'd better get out there and find me a husband pronto before I am destined to live my life in mediocrity for all eternity! I wonder if that bloke that asked me way back, the one that turned out to be a world travelled, high flying alcoholic is still interested? He'd do! Wouldn't he? I mean we could be married, so I'd have cred and be socially acceptable and he'd be hammered most of the time so I wouldn't see much of him anyway.
We can't have people running around thinking less of me for being unwed at 40. I can't cope with that kind of rejection.
Love, love your attitude and couldn't have said it better!!
There is a school of thought that people aged 40 and up who've never been married are too set in their ways to adapt to living with a partner, they don't know how to give/take/flex, may be too rigid and thus not a good partner.
Mike - You've always appreared to have a level head - WHAT HAPPENED?
Love, love your attitude and couldn't have said it better!!
Thanks!
I've had a lot of practice with my baby brother.
Seems he thinks getting married and having kids was some kind of incredibly clever thing that he did and it somehow makes him a better person or something.
Well....he DID think that.........but I set him straight pretty quickly!
Everybody has their own story, their own journey to make. I think people need to be concerned with their own lives and how they came to be where they are and if they're happy, not raining down judgement or making blanket generalizations on others for not following exactly the same path. What a boring world that would be, hey?
Now excuse me...I'm getting a wee desperate about my social standing. I need to go find one of these husband thingies every girl has to have!
I, too, am worried that being 47 and never married is a "dealbreaker" for guys my age. I was in a LTR for about 10 years right out of high school, practically, but not quite, living with the guy who left me for his best friend from Jr. High when I was 27. I was pretty devastated by this and didn't want to date for a couple years. In the meantime, I went back to school to get my degree, got a new job that required 14 hour days, and took care of both my parents through terminal illnesses in my thirties and early forties. I was so focused on family responsibilities (lost my mom when I was 41 and my dad when I was 45) as well as work responsibilities that I just had no energy to really date. Hung out with some guys as friends but that was it. During that time, I also gained weight, which I lost about two years ago, trying to get my life back on track. I then was in a long distance relationship for one year but it didn't work out, and now I'm trying online dating for the first time.
But while I get a lot of guys looking at my profile, very few are contacting me. I had 128 views yesterday, but no takers. I've had male and female friends look at my pics and profile and they think "they're great", so I'm wondering if it's my unmarried status that causes alarm. Even had a friend offer to go to Vegas with me, marry me one day and divorce me the next, just so I could honestly say I'm "divorced." I don't plan on doing something that crazy, but not sure how I can communicate that there's nothing wrong with me; in fact, I really have less baggage to bring to a relationship than someone who's been divorced one or more times.
The other reason I think the "never been married" info might be scaring guys away is because the first question guys ask me on a date is "How come you've never been married?" and they say this like they just can't believe it. One guy told me, "What'd you do? Turn everybody down?" ...like I was so picky I wouldn't settle for anyone. The truth is I was in love twice and it just didn't work out. Can I just say that and is that enough of an acceptable answer when a guy asks? Should I address it in my profile and try to explain the reason? Should I lie on my profile and say "divorced" on my status and then just tell the truth right away when a guy emails or takes me out? Or do I just give up? It's very discouraging.
age is cruel to the internet dater. that is the great part about CDF, you can waffle til they plant you without discrimination. forget about it, have fun.
Mike - You've always appreared to have a level head - WHAT HAPPENED?
I'm a Mike admirer too and at first glance I would have said the same thing, but his statement does have a semblance of truth, although as he says "there is a school of thought" and that's exactly what it is; a school of thought that not everyone buys into it. Even I would question a man in his forties never married, but would get to know him first.
For me my ideal man to settle down with (at my ripe age) would be one that never married or doesn't have young children....going to be hard to come buy, but hey I can dream, non? I've dated, but haven't had anything long term in 4 years and to be honest getting stuck in my ways and really liking what I've created for myself, but would never describe myself as rigid or not willing to be flexible.
Darn Moonshadow you said it so flipin well:
Quote:
Everybody has their own story, their own journey to make. I think people need to be concerned with their own lives and how they came to be where they are and if they're happy, not raining down judgement or making blanket generalizations on others for not following exactly the same path. What a boring world that would be, hey?
It takes an extraordinary, understanding, fair, experienced, worldly man to ever understand me or women of my calibre (something none of the "dudes" who have made unsubstantiated claims or given opinions on the subject would no tuppence about. As my late father would say, "consider the source"..... and my daddy was a helluva man.
I, too, am worried that being 47 and never married is a "dealbreaker" for guys my age....
But while I get a lot of guys looking at my profile, very few are contacting me. I had 128 views yesterday, but no takers....
Even had a friend offer to go to Vegas with me, marry me one day and divorce me the next, just so I could honestly say I'm "divorced." I don't plan on doing something that crazy.
Shania,
Why don't you change your status on your profile to "divorced" just for a day or two and see what your results are then. It would be a very interesting experiment.
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Mega Reps for this one!
....but I set him straight pretty quickly! 
I need to go find one of these husband thingies every girl has to have! 
