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Before you pick one out and get it sized, be sure you (a) know her ring size and (b) know that she will like it. Once you have them size it it's yours. That's usually only a problem when they have to cut and solder it to make it smaller, but you can use a ring guard in place of cutting. What you can do is pick one out that you think she'll like, surprise her with it, and then you can offer to exchange it for something more to her taste...just be careful, she may sneak in a carat or two on you if you leave yourself open for that. j/k
I have told my boyfriend my specifics that I want....then from there, he can surprise me. He knows the shape of stone I want, the stones on the sides I would love, and that I do not want a high setting. From there, it's his game. Both the rest of the ring and the (fingers crossed) proposal will be plenty enough of a surprise for me!
IMO, it is hard to go in completely blind to her preferences. I would HATE a really high set ring with a skinny band, and that is some gals ideal. See if you can suss out a few things beforehand. I personally would see what shape of stone she likes, a preference to a high or low setting, a general preference of simple or a vintage style (you could probably tell this by her style, though), and a yellow gold or "other" (silver, platinum, etc) band. From there, I bet you could pick out a completely amazing ring! Congrats!!
Well, I picked out several rings at various places and then he went back later and got the one I liked the most. We had already discussed marriage so it wasn't like my looking at rings was going to ruin a surprise proposal. If we hadn't discussed marriage I would have been just as happy with a ring he picked out since for me it was about marrying him, not the ring.
Since I did the proposing, there was no ring at that moment. He already knew that I was very particular about shape, that I preferred either a marquise or a pear. A week later he found that he couldn't decide so he bought 2 rings and let me choose. The first was a 1 ct marquise solitaire and the other was a 1 ct marquise with 0.50 ct baguettes on the side. Since I prefer a simpler setting, I chose the solitaire. Once the decision was made, the other ring was returned and the solitaire was sized down for my skinny finger.
If this has been discussed, there are ways to figure out what she wants without you actually asking your loved one what she wants. I don't care what any one says, we secretly want a diamond ( I know I would) so you better work it out.
Do your homework and don't shop at the Mall for your ring. They will rip you off and you won't get a good quality ring. Have her friends help you with this so you can at least get an idea of what she would like.
My husband had mine designed and he totally surprised me! He met several times with the jeweler and he would make up some story about having a study group (he was in a graduate program at the time) when he was really plotting (or designing...how ever you want to look at it!)...
I don't think I would have liked to have gone shopping with him to look at rings...he knew me well enough to know what I would like and I love that about him.
I'm trying to avoid her friends and sisters, because they will blow it. I'll probably try to get her politiking brother in law to find out. He's got the gift of gab and will least likely blow it. He's been a real good, middle of the road guy in this whole process.
I want as little input directly from her, because I feel like it's my symbol to her...as many of you said it's about the symbolism more than it is the symbol. So it may not be to her exact specifications, but I have a good idea of what kind of girl she is, as far as style and all that, because we have a similar approach to a lot of stuff (we're not flashy and don't like a lot of unwarranted attention, but at the same time classy). So I'll definitely be in the ball park.
The more input she gives, the less authentic the experience is for me. I don't want her to have the slightest idea that she's about to get it, so the less she's involved, the more likely she'll be surprised and the better the reaction.
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