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Well...for starters, your hanging with some dude that hasn't really made love to you in the last 6 years. Is he by chance...one of those manlet's?
Seriously...if there is nothing there for you...your obviously with the wrong guy. Seems like your just using him...and not returning the favor. Thats so low.
Now if your both cool with being just friends no big deal. But your probably giving the guy blue balls on a daily basis, and thats just mean. Show a little compasion.
This is no act. This is me and what's really going on is exactly what I told you.
You know what I am done with justifying myself. I came here for help and nothing more. I was never looking for sympathy or "acting".
I can't believe I just spilled my most personal secrets only for this to happen. I have a lump in my throat. I tried to pm you, away from prying eyes and so no one else could see my act and deeesperate cry for attention as you think, to personally ask you why you're saying the things you are, but I couldn't pm you.
I am going to log off now and try my very best not to come back here. Thanks to those who showed me kindness.
Last edited by akeshabelle; 01-31-2010 at 09:55 PM..
Well you should be. I am only 28 and have been having unenjoyable sex since I was 22 - and it's all my fault. I despise myself, what I have done to myself and what I have done to him.
Snort he is very overweight, hairy and he is poorly endowed. He has been promising to lose weight for years but it has never happened.
Call me what you will, it sounds harsh and I sound like a cruel ***** but you asked so I am telling you.
I would really love to hear from others who have been/are in my situation.
Do you make excuses?
Do you keep it from them because you don't have the heart to say those cruel words?
Can you go on living like this your whole life?
And women lie all the time and say size does not matter. This is the biggest "trying to make my man feel good and confident" lie ever perpetrated by women. Time and time again, we find the truth hidden within these posts.
It sounds like this fat, hairy, slob of a man (your description), with shrunken male parts needs a complete overhall. Often times massive weight loss and a good razor will bring back the rest. Most wieners look very small on obese men. If you take the exact same willy and place it on a very skinny man, it will seem huge. And most can't get the job done on an obese guy because the fat gets in the way.
Tell this fat, hairy, guy to go on a extreme diet and exercise program for 6 months. I'll bet you find him attractive. Seriously! You owe him that chance, in my humble opinion.
Thank you. As much as I love them I blame my parents entirely for the way I am, and harbour resentment for my sister as well, who was always in bed when all of this was going on. I would always get woken up by the yelling or slapping, she being a ridiculously heavy sleeper, wouldn't. She is independant and ballsy whereas I am dependant and wussy.
Inability to make decisions, even everyday decisions, without the advice and reassurance of others
Most definitely.
Intense fear of abandonment and a sense of devastation or helplessness when relationships end; often move right into another relationship when one ends.
Haven't been single since I was 15.
Over-sensitivity to criticism
Yep.
Pessimism and lack of self-confidence
Oh heck yes.
Avoidance of disagreeing with others for fear of losing support or approval
Absolutely.
Willingness to tolerate mistreatment and abuse from others
Definitely.
Tendency to be naïve and to live in fantasy
Yes.
So how do I gather the strength to do what needs to be done??
Read self-help books. There are many out there. Read general psych if you aren't too savvy, or get into it "for real" and arm yourself with knowledge. You will feel more confident immediately!
Most importantly though-Meet with a doctor!. Don't wait. Gather the strength to do so by knowing that you have tendencies that need to be addressed and it's not something you will overcome by yourself. Only an experienced psychotherapist can gain enough insight into making any type of diagnosis.
You will never improve yourself and your lifestyle and amitibion by engaging in unsatisfying arrangements with father figures and filling the void that was left by not having a healthy f/d relationship. So it seems, your role is (1)fufilling another controlling mans needs by engaging passively in the relationship (2) leading on an unsuspecting man with false premise...and so on...it's unhealthy ..
And women lie all the time and say size does not matter. This is the biggest "trying to make my man feel good and confident" lie ever perpetrated by women. Time and time again, we find the truth hidden within these posts.
It sounds like this fat, hairy, slob of a man (your description), with shrunken male parts needs a complete overhall. Often times massive weight loss and a good razor will bring back the rest. Most wieners look very small on obese men. If you take the exact same willy and place it on a very skinny man, it will seem huge. And most can't get the job done on an obese guy because the fat gets in the way.
Tell this fat, hairy, guy to go on a extreme diet and exercise program for 6 months. I'll bet you find him attractive. Seriously! You owe him that chance, in my humble opinion.
Nah, thats not it man...this fat worthless sounding bastard isnt going to do anything about his hideous condition. If he were going to do something, he would have done it by now...46 years old isnt the age to start having a massive overhaul to fulfill sexual conquests. You do that kind of shi t when you're 30 - 36..but at 46, hes basically stuck being an undesirable and he knows it...which is why he's settling for a relationship with this selfish dame. He doesnt really have options from what I can tell. If he did have options, when he realized that he had locked up with a sexually repressive or gay girlfriend like this, he would have left the relationship 5 years ago..
Im guessing he's just trying to ride it out so he doesnt die alone.
Sorry, Akeshabelle, you read me wrongly, I do not believe that you are crying for attention with this thread.
Your posts are too articulate and intelligent for your story to make any sense, things just don't add up.
Chances are that you are nothing of the person you describe, a 28 year-old girl with a 48 year old bf.
I truly believe that your gender, age, and situation have nothing to do with this person.
Why don't you make it more interesting by giving us a story behind the story?
P.S. I am surprised, I received PM's from other people. I'll check my profile settings.
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