San Diego is not a good place to date or live for black women (San Jose: high school, bars)

[metoque]

Originally Posted by ctr88

Black women in Europe from the Caribbean and Africa in Europe have a different vibe about them then American black women. They seem more sweet and feminine and less of that hard edge, attitude and chip on the shoulder many American black women seem have (not all of course, but many).

This is true. American black women (as a generalization) have a chip on their shoulder that men don't want to deal with. It's almost like a "feminazi" vibe that is a major turn-off, and I think it stems from the entitlement/Affirmative Action culture of "I need to be treated as special because I'm a woman and I'm black, and if I'm not selected for a job or if someone doesn't find me attractive, they MUST be a racist."

I'm NOT saying the OP is this way, but I have dealt with this in the work place and in actual dating situations...gets old real quick.

[1AngryTaxPayer]

Originally Posted by metoque

No way is it "Man Diego". San Diego has tons of hot women around. If you think it's bad here, try San Jose (truly "Man Jose") or Seattle and you'll see what slim pickins is all about.

If you have any game at all you can date here.

[aboveordinary]

Originally Posted by metoque

No way is it "Man Diego". San Diego has tons of hot women around. If you think it's bad here, try San Jose (truly "Man Jose") or Seattle and you'll see what slim pickins is all about.

I'm just talking about what I've heard other men say about dating in San Diego. Somebody on here even made a thread about it. //www.city-data.com/forum/san-d...ad-dating.html

[metoque]

Originally Posted by aboveordinary

I'm just talking about what I've heard other men say about dating in San Diego. Somebody on here even made a thread about it. //www.city-data.com/forum/san-d...ad-dating.html

Like the other poster just said, they got no game then. If you can't make it in San Diego from a dating perspective, you'll struggle anywhere else unless you lower your bar or move to a 3rd world country.

This city has been the most dating friendly I've witnessed on the West Coast. Seattle and San Francisco are bad because there's a culture of feminism and emasculating men, and women treat men badly and think they're the hottest thing since carbonation, whereas I don't get that vibe at all here in San Diego or other places I've lived like the Rocky Mountain region.

[sdlife619]

Black women here in the U.S. do have an attitude problem. I live around them currently, and have Black friends that will never date a Black girl, because of their hardcore stance on everything.

They won't allow their man to be a man, as they always want the control. Always yelling and screaming at them and accusing them of messing around. Who wants to be with anybody like that?

They can't or refuse to let their "Ghettoness" go. This is the problem, they wont change.

I've seen a lot fine Black girls in SD, but 100% of the time, the ones that come from the Hood will never ever date outside their race which I don't understand because if Black men don't care to date them as much, they have ran out of options and are SOL, boohoo. They probably need to search for a Paul Wall type then.


Educated well off Blacks, it's a whole different ball game as they don't limit themselves as much. A Perfect example are 3 of my cousins that are half Black, but look Puerto Rican. Beautiful girls BTW, and are all married to White guys that are all successful.

[Cara_319]

Originally Posted by LuvSouthOC

I don't know about San Diego since I am not there all the time. I can tell you what I see in LA and in OC. I am seeing quite a few white male/black female couples these days; it's quite noticeable at the Irvine Spectrum. The black women seem very classy and nice, well educated. These couples look like they are going places.

I am not sure why the previous poster had to add the gay thing.

Do the white men also appear to be classy, nice and well educated? I find it odd that you only mentioned the appearance of the black women and not the white men.

[Cara_319]

Originally Posted by ctr88

The OP does have a point.

No the OP doesn't have a point.

I have noticed from casual observance on the West Coast it seems like 70-80% of black males are with non-black women. It is actually fairly rare these days to see a black man/black women couple on the west coast. And in the U.S. white, hispanic and asian men do not date black women in high numbers. And studies have shown something like 70% of black women dating age are single (the most of any race of women).

None of what you state is true. Also, for the record, Hispanic is not a race, there are black, white, mestizo and asian hispanics.

Studies also have shown black men are the most likely of any gender/race and any to date outside their race. So she is not imagining this at all, there is definately more of a challenge for black women dating in America (but not just SD, it's probably everywhere, but likely even worse in SD).

Can you post the studies, because the census indicates that blacks are less likely than other races to marry inter-racially.

It's interesting though when I was in Europe (France, Portugal) recently, I saw A LOT more white men with black women & with mixed children. These are black women from Brazil, Caribbean and Africa who are European immigrants (or their parents were immigrants and they were born in Europe - they are not American black women). Black women in Europe from the Caribbean and Africa in Europe have a different vibe about them then American black women. They seem more sweet and feminine and less of that hard edge, attitude and chip on the shoulder many American black women seem have (not all of course, but many).

It's important to recognize that race in the U.S. is far more salient than in other nations (due to the history of slavery, segregation and the general prevailing divisions among whites and blacks). Black American women who reside overseas in Europe however, are typically viewed more favorably than African women (since many African women are more often than not viewed as impoverished and/or as prostitutes).

They also have great French & British accents which adds to allure (vs. U.S. ebonics hood slang of many American black women). I think this is part of it, and European white men also have less of hang up about dating black women than American white men.

"Ebonics/hood slang" is typically used among low income people (of all races). Educated/middle income people do not usually incorporate hood slang into their speech patterns. Do any of the black American women featured in the below videos use ebonics? They are residing outside of America...The truth is, it's typically middle/upper income people who travel and/or reside outside of the U.S., not poor Americans.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SVu63z169o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDgRKKKdF6Q


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-jpErK6mfg


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=491sRIG3ZjM


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rd_xIXnMfqQ


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbSCLxyPQcs


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Np56JLuJQ4s


I do however agree that more often than not, European men (on average) have less hangups regarding race and appear to be less focused on race than white Americans.

[cjairo191]

Originally Posted by sandiegohatesme

I haven't met that many black women in San Diego

and the fellow black women I know are all single

There is no love for black women.
The black men are so desperate to get non-black women and non-black men don't even consider us an option..

It's unfortunate but I have to wait a year to finish my graduate degree and then leave.
It's a shame too since I was on a PhD track at UCSD.


I would like to think it's for reasons other than that I'm black but there are no other logical reasons
All of my girlfriends, who in other cities would be considered less attractive than me (and even they admit they are less physically attractive), all get hit on and approached at bars when I am out with them and they all happen to be non-black women.

Moderator cut: .


I have turned quite angry, which I don't like. I don't want to end up in Dante's 5th circle in hell.

My wife left San Diego for this reason. She moved to Florida and met me a nice Caribbean background guy. You need to get out of California if you looking to date. Maybe Atlanta Charlotte Houston Dallas or other big cities on the better side of the country. A little bias in that last point lol.

[hitman619]

I like all women
"I like them black, brown, white, puerto rican and Asian"

[bigdaddy5]

You'll notice the mixed black girls (half Asian, Filipino) are better tempered in some ways (I have some in my family). But they're attracted to the lighter shades of brown.