Is St. Louis Transplant friendly?? (Washington, Lake St. Louis: transplants, renting, homes) - Missouri (MO) - City-Data Forum

GettingOutOfCA · 08-22-2009, 07:22 PM

I'm considering a move to St. Louis for a job transfer since I'd get a pay increase. As a late 20s single person (male), is st louis a place that is "friendly" to transplants? I've heard people are really nice there, but that its often hard for transplants to make friends since people there tend to be from the area and have existing social networks which they arent too eager to build on with outsiders. (wow - that was a really long sentence

) Is there any truth to that? It would be great if anyone reading this were a single transplant living in the area and could comment.

DinsdalePirahna · 08-22-2009, 08:42 PM

I'm out of CA myself and moved here from Newport Beach. On the positive side, if you can survive in CA with what you are making and then getting a pay increase to move to MO, you are already ahead of the game.

The key is to have a job already lined up. It is very difficult to find a position if you do not have a local pedigree (you will find the biggest and most annoying question here is "what high school did you go to?". Employers seem to be very leery toward outsiders. I'm making most of my money from my California clients. They are coming to me because I am able to charge less, and they don't want to take their business offshore.

I've had no problem making friends, most are transplants like myself, but I do have plenty of "local" friends. You will have to make an effort. Join clubs that interest you. If you are religious, Missouri is in the heart of Jesus Land and you can always join a church. There are plenty of different denominations that may suit you. (and one of the strangest things I saw when coming up I-44 were these numerous clusters of Adult Bookstores, Fireworks stands and a Church. Amusing and sad at the same time.

When you move into a neighborhood, you will be treated as a curiosity for a while. But if you don't run a nightly ç0çk fight or do anything really bizarre, people will leave you alone, but they will also be around if you need them.

I don't know what part of CA you are coming from, but I still miss the beaches, weather, mountains and cosmopolitan vibe of Southern California.

AJohnston_STL · 08-22-2009, 10:32 PM

We are transplants, but trying to make friends is difficult for us because we are married with a 2 year old. Not many 24/22 year olds have 2 year olds. If you are coming from CA and getting a pay increase, you could afford to live probably just about anywhere if you are going to be renting. A good place to start to make friends fairly close to your age would be downtown, Soulard, & the Central West End. The CWE is full of college students due to its access to transit (Metrolink/Metrobus) and its proximity to Washington University. I'm sure it's also full of college graduates. Downtown would also be desireable for your being a young professional, as downtown is mostly decently-earning graduates. Soulard would be another good choice just because of its urbanity and walkability to several neighborhood restaurants and bars. I can't confirm but would suggest it is a healthy mix of younger professionals, some college students, and young adults (around age 30)...my idea about Soulard is strictly a guess though.

OA 5599 · 08-23-2009, 08:38 AM

I only transplanted here a few weeks ago, so I can only provide a small amount of insight. I'm also a mid-twenties single male.

Everyone I've encountered so far has been very friendly towards me and interested to hear about where I've lived before here. Not a single person in my group at work is originally from St. Louis, though most of them are from Missouri or a neighboring state (as I am too).

I haven't had too much time to go out on my own and meet people as I've been working a lot of OT this past week. I have joined one local organization, where most of the people were native St. Louisians, and they seemed very glad to have me. As DinsdalePirahna mentioned, I have definitely treated as a curiosity, which is almost flattering.

One large difference you'll notice coming from CA is that people in the Midwest marry young. It is not uncommon for people to get married as soon as they graduate college, or even high school, and most people in the 26 and up age range I've met here have been married. I'm not sure how this will affect my ability to grow a social base here.

People of all ages are definitely very friendly here however. You'll of course run into a few people who aren't, but the general vibe is polite and open.

Just make sure you live in the city if you move here. I'd likely be miserable out in the suburbs. The city seems to have a lot of younger people and a lot of stuff going on. I definitely haven't felt bored here so far, and I doubt I will a very long time. I live in Dogtown, which isn't the most exciting neighborhood (I'll probably move to the Central West End or Tower Grove South next year), but even then, I'm still 10 minutes away from a lot of really cool places.

stlcitygirl · 08-23-2009, 11:34 AM

GettingoutofCA,
My neighborhood in South City seems to be mostly transplants. You will be completely fine, just make sure to live in the city (Downtown, Central West End, Soulard/Benton Park) I also suggest joining a kickball, volleyball, softball team or your neighborhood association. Another option is a group called Metropolis, www.mstl.org, this is a great way to meet people. People here do tend to get married earlier than the coasts, but I have several single friends in their 30's that have an active dating life.

Marksman84 · 08-23-2009, 07:21 PM

Accentuate the positive, disregard the negative, and you'll be fine. Singles scene is good in the City, not-so-good in the County.

rgb123 · 08-23-2009, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marksman84

Accentuate the positive, disregard the negative, and you'll be fine. Singles scene is good in the City, not-so-good in the County.

are people not willing to drive to meet people? I consider 30 miles or less no big deal....or is this really a problem?

muman · 08-24-2009, 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgb123

are people not willing to drive to meet people? I consider 30 miles or less no big deal....or is this really a problem?

It can be if you want to be near a singles scene, or if you're out having a couple of drinks after work, and don't need a DUI. Some other people just don't want 30-60 minute commute for a social and/or work life.

MrZetec · 08-24-2009, 02:41 PM

Lived in St. Louis for a few years, and in St. Louis it is almost like the larger cities in the outer counties are treated as if they are small separate cities rather then part of the St. Louis metropolitan area, I live and work in Lake St. Louis, and when I tell people out here that I went to south county or downtown they act like I drove to Texas or Colorado. I just don't get it. It also seems a lot of people marry people who attended the same High School. Just be aware it is out there, a 30-40 mile drive for a St. Louisian is a long trip.

Also just a little tidbit, Women in your age group in the St. Louis area seem to have low self esteem, and fearful of being alone, even though they are just as attractive and intelligent as women from all over the country. I have never seen anything like this before, or is it that women from Northern California and Texas (the two other areas I am familiar with) are different then the rest of the country.

rgb123 · 08-24-2009, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrZetec

Lived in St. Louis for a few years, and in St. Louis it is almost like the larger cities in the outer counties are treated as if they are small separate cities rather then part of the St. Louis metropolitan area, I live and work in Lake St. Louis, and when I tell people out here that I went to south county or downtown they act like I drove to Texas or Colorado. I just don't get it. It also seems a lot of people marry people who attended the same High School. Just be aware it is out there, a 30-40 mile drive for a St. Louisian is a long trip.

Also just a little tidbit, Women in your age group in the St. Louis area seem to have low self esteem, and fearful of being alone, even though they are just as attractive and intelligent as women from all over the country. I have never seen anything like this before, or is it that women from Northern California and Texas (the two other areas I am familiar with) are different then the rest of the country.

Interesting....I definitley don't have a fear of being alone. Been alone for a long time. I'm originally from the Chicago area. I know a lot of women who stayed in my town who are like that, because they have never been alone. I imagine most people are like that if they have never left their homes.

Also, 30-60 miles is no big deal to me I think because I have travelled so much. In fact, I consider St. Louis close to home even though it's a good 5 hour drive!

Once you have lived in California, Texas, Florida, Minnesota....you get a different idea of what is "far"

I lived in the suburbs of Chicago too though, and lots of people prefer to date in their enclave. I think it is silly, but something to keep in mind I guess.

Hopefully after my trip this weekend I will have a better idea of where I will want to live.