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Or, are you saying, if I am childless, then I should only work as a teacher, in day care, in CPS, and the like?
My personal preference has been to date women working in traditional feminine jobs like elementary school teacher, daycare, CPS, nurse, and the like. I have wanted my girlfriends to have low stress jobs so that they could be focused on being good girlfriends and supportive to my needs. Also, lower stress jobs enable them to spend more time at the gym (important to me because I want a physically fit girlfriend) and have time to cook healthier meals for both of us (diet is even more important than exercise).
Parents in the United States have generally done a lousy job raising their children for the last 40-50 years.
We do a terrible job teaching our boys to be men. Absentee fathers have a lot to do with this, as single moms cannot by nature teach boys to men. However, even present fathers haven't done a good job raising their boys. A lot of present fathers who are generally decent men have ill prepared their sons for navigating a degenerate society that was less degenerate when the fathers were in their teens and early 20s, leaving a group of weakling men who are likely to get massively taken advantage of by women or completely ignored by women and sent to the reject bin. The women who end up with the aforementioned weakling men are generally careerist women who will dump the guy around in their 30s or early 40s. Those women will need a career. There are guys with absentee fathers will learn masculinity from the streets or online forums and engage in some variant of deviant behavior. Many women will reward these men with sex but they cannot depend on these men to be husbands and providers, therefore these women will need to support themselves. As a man, it is a better blueprint to be some variant of deviant because you will be rewarded with a healthy sex life, as opposed to a boring, nice guy, where you will either be rewarded by being having less frequent sex than some deviant with a lesser attractive women, or taken advantage of in family court when a woman decides she's lost attraction, or just completely ignored by women. All these things contribute to women's perceived need to work because she can't have a good man who is a traditional, patriarchal leader.
We do a terrible job teaching our girls to be women. We've eliminated home economics programs from schools. We teach our girls feminist ideals of taking care of yourself instead of depending on a man when we should be teaching our girls to demand a good man, not some variant of a deviant. A lot of our girls end up as either more masculine than they should be, or with toxic feminist programming that is not attractive to masculine men.
There's an element of biology in this question, but a heavy cultural component to it. Right now, in the West, a decaying culture is ruining healthy, biological based notions of interactions between the sexes, leading to an environments where large swaths of both sexes are unhappy.
We would be happiest if we worked as nature intended and a had a healthy culture influencing our thought processes.
Here's a tip - chit happens. You can be on top of the world one day and on the bottom the next - depending on how well your husband manages his finances. If he falls - you fall with him. IF, at that point, you are 58 years old with zero skills, zero degree, and haven't worked in 30 years - great luck finding a salary that you can live on. .
Learn how to invest money like I did. Then it won't be this big disaster that you describe.
Learn how to invest money like I did. Then it won't be this big disaster that you describe.
That works only when the spouse WITH the paycheck treats the spouse WITHOUT the paycheck as a full partner, including financially. That doesn’t always happen, though it happens these days more often than in the past when women often were given only an “allowance” to run the household and the man took care of the rest (or not).
Added: I am going to edit my statement to include the word “often” to avoid people’s thinking that this was the case in every single household or that I thought it was.
My personal preference has been to date women working in traditional feminine jobs like elementary school teacher, daycare, CPS, nurse, and the like. I have wanted my girlfriends to have low stress jobs so that they could be focused on being good girlfriends and supportive to my needs. Also, lower stress jobs enable them to spend more time at the gym (important to me because I want a physically fit girlfriend) and have time to cook healthier meals for both of us (diet is even more important than exercise).
Parents in the United States have generally done a lousy job raising their children for the last 40-50 years.
We do a terrible job teaching our boys to be men. Absentee fathers have a lot to do with this, as single moms cannot by nature teach boys to men. However, even present fathers haven't done a good job raising their boys. A lot of present fathers who are generally decent men have ill prepared their sons for navigating a degenerate society that was less degenerate when the fathers were in their teens and early 20s, leaving a group of weakling men who are likely to get massively taken advantage of by women or completely ignored by women and sent to the reject bin. The women who end up with the aforementioned weakling men are generally careerist women who will dump the guy around in their 30s or early 40s. Those women will need a career. There are guys with absentee fathers will learn masculinity from the streets or online forums and engage in some variant of deviant behavior. Many women will reward these men with sex but they cannot depend on these men to be husbands and providers, therefore these women will need to support themselves. As a man, it is a better blueprint to be some variant of deviant because you will be rewarded with a healthy sex life, as opposed to a boring, nice guy, where you will either be rewarded by being having less frequent sex than some deviant with a lesser attractive women, or taken advantage of in family court when a woman decides she's lost attraction, or just completely ignored by women. All these things contribute to women's perceived need to work because she can't have a good man who is a traditional, patriarchal leader.
We do a terrible job teaching our girls to be women. We've eliminated home economics programs from schools. We teach our girls feminist ideals of taking care of yourself instead of depending on a man when we should be teaching our girls to demand a good man, not some variant of a deviant. A lot of our girls end up as either more masculine than they should be, or with toxic feminist programming that is not attractive to masculine men.
There's an element of biology in this question, but a heavy cultural component to it. Right now, in the West, a decaying culture is ruining healthy, biological based notions of interactions between the sexes, leading to an environments where large swaths of both sexes are unhappy.
We would be happiest if we worked as nature intended and a had a healthy culture influencing our thought processes.
It is really interesting that you think nursing is a low-stress job.
If all women had been happy doing as your post suggests, they’d still be doing it. Thankfully, we have choices now for the most part—sometimes constrained by economic necessity—and it should be up to the individual to make her choices. Some want to work and have no children, some want to work and have children, some want to stay home and have children, and there may be some who stay home and have no children.
Your post reminds me of the thinking that was prevalent in the 1950s and earlier. My father, who was born in 1917, thought in a similar manner though he seemed a bit more flexible. It’s easy to think like this when you aren’t the one faced with living that way, I guess. Women have brains and don’t need a patriarchal leader to tell us what to do so we don’t have to worry our pretty little heads about it.
Added: I agree that parents have done a poor job in many cases today, but I don’t believe it has anything to do with the things you have suggested.
If all women had been happy doing as your post suggests, they’d still be doing it. Thankfully, we have choices now for the most part—sometimes constrained by economic necessity—and it should be up to the individual to make her choices. Some want to work and have no children, some want to work and have children, some want to stay home and .
Maybe, but I think his dating preferences are his own business. If he wants to date women in traditionally female-dominated jobs he can do that. In fact there's been male posters on this thread that said the opposite and they aren't getting bashed for it.
Maybe, but I think his dating preferences are his own business. If he wants to date women in traditionally female-dominated jobs he can do that. In fact there's been male posters on this thread that said the opposite and they aren't getting bashed for it.
Yes, he is certainly free to date whomever he wishes. I didn’t say otherwise. The only thing I said about his wish to date women in traditionally female jobs was that he said he preferred women to have low stress jobs and he listed nursing among them. Nursing is far from low stress. I hardly think that is bashing him.
The part you quoted refers to his post overall and had nothing to do with his dating preferences.
That works only when the spouse WITH the paycheck treats the spouse WITHOUT the paycheck as a full partner, including financially. That doesn’t always happen, though it happens these days more often than in the past when wonen were given only an “allowance” to run the household and the man took care of the rest (or not).
Really? I have my own investments that are not in my husband's name.
Really? I have my own investments that are not in my husband's name.
So, which was it? Did you have a paycheck or other money of your own when you made those investments or did your husband treat you as a full partner financially?
Yes, he is certainly free to date whomever he wishes. I didn’t say otherwise. The only thing I said about his wish to date women in traditionally female jobs was that he said he preferred women to have low stress jobs and he listed nursing among them. Nursing is far from low stress. I hardly think that is bashing him.
The part you quoted refers to his post overall and had nothibg to do with his dating preferences.
I might add that CPS is not a low stress job, either.
I might add that CPS is not a low stress job, either.
Very good point! Nursing just jumped out at me because my son is a nurse.
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