Why Does Dating Suck In Metro Atlanta areas? (Tiger: sales, hotel)

[wanda123]

Originally Posted by RoslynHolcomb

I just think it's interesting that it's okay for men to have expectations: She's got to be hot, and willing to deliver no-strings-attached-sex at the drop of a hat. Oh and she's got to be able to cook too. So it's okay to expect a woman to be attractive, sexy and domesticated. But not okay to expect a man to be ambitious and kind. Right.

Rosyln - thanks for being the voice of reason.

I have always said that Walt Disney has ruined women's expectations of what their ideal man should be like - and Hugh Hefner, Betty Crocker and June Cleaver have ruined men's expectations.

[FlyiMetro]

Originally Posted by wanda123

So, how do "these women EARN this Mr. Perfect?" I have always thought that I just need to be the type of woman that the type of man I want is attracted to (hope that makes sense). If I want a man who takes care of himself and is physically fit, I should do the same. Are you saying there are other things women should do to EARN such a man?

I won't speak for all women, but I am happy to compromise on some of the things that I really want in a guy. I would prefer to date a man who is at least 6'2" (i'm 5'10" flat footed), but I have dated guys my height and even 5'9" (can't go any shorter than that - I feel like an amazon). I have dated outside of my religion - although I would prefer to date a guy who shares my beliefs. There are some things, though, that are completely non-negotiable. He must treat me - as well as others - with respect, and he must have a good heart.

I may be guilty of wanting too much, but I have been blessed to have dated a few great guys in the past - for some reason my personality tends to work well with officers in the military. They are confident, ambitious, intelligent and extremely respectful. And they look really handsome in their uniforms. Maybe I should blame them for setting the bar so high....

Respectful is a subjective term, especially for someone who is not easily offend as other black people. Im also a navy brat so I see what u mean with military guys. My parents are still married. My take is people IN GEneral want & desire too much, but no one seems to want peace & harmony. Im attracted to certain types of women, but I dont complain if I cant get them. You say u want to attract a certain man, but what stops other men from being attracted to you? When the undesirables come around dont you get annoyed? I think many men overvalue women as if they are worth more than us. So now this has created this tread of outspoken women & women with mr perfect list. I dont blame the women for this. If I had women approaching me everyday & bothering me everyday, id probably overvalue myself like these so called educated black women do now. Many of them need a reality check & eventually it will happen. I dont blame the women for thinking they deserve Mr. Perfect....the problem is all the lames who wont ignore them, keep trying to holla & basically boost an already inflated ego. Those damn Betas...

[FlyiMetro]

Originally Posted by RoslynHolcomb

Do you realize what you just said? Are you actually implying that black men can't be ambitious and kind? Considering that I've pretty much dated the rainbow I know this not to be true. I've met and dated plenty of hard-working, ambitious and kind black men in my day.

None good enough to marry huh Roslyn?

[anothertntony]

Originally Posted by wanda123

Yes, there are many men in Atlanta. Sadly, I am having a difficult time finding a non-attached, heterosexual, tall, ambitious, physically fit, kind, witty, educated, age-appropriate, adventurous man. And before you assume I am being too picky, I should note that I am also educated, tall and physically fit .... therefore I want a partner who I don't have to look down to (literally) and who will go biking and hiking with me.

I can commiserate. I am having a difficult time winning the Powerball lottery. And before you assume I'm being facetious, I should note that I bought one ticket several years ago. Yet, here I sit, sans lottery winnings.

More seriously: Good luck in your search, but that is quite a list.

[RoslynHolcomb]

Originally Posted by FlyiMetro

None good enough to marry huh Roslyn?

A few, but sometimes timing simply isn't right.

[RoslynHolcomb]

Originally Posted by anothertntony

I can commiserate. I am having a difficult time winning the Powerball lottery. And before you assume I'm being facetious, I should note that I bought one ticket several years ago. Yet, here I sit, sans lottery winnings.

More seriously: Good luck in your search, but that is quite a list.

Really, that list is too much to consider? Let's examine it, just to be sure.

Non-attached: Okay, that seems like a reasonable request. Most folk don't want to be with someone who is with someone else.

Heterosexual: Again, quite reasonable. I think it's beyond the pale to expect a woman to want a man who is into other men.

Tall, physically fit: Can't fault her this one. To my mind a woman wanting a man who is tall and physically fit is the equivalent to a man wanting a physically attractive woman. This is especially true if she herself is tall and physically fit.

Kind: I'm actually surprised this one made the list. Surely it's a given. Who wants a jerk?

Witty: A good sense of humor is crucial to me as well.

Educated: Assuming that she too is educated I don't think this is too much to ask.

Age-appropriate: I gather that she wants a man within a reasonable range of her own age. Nothing outrageous there. Personally I never wanted an old dude and had no interest in being a grown man's mama. I so totally get this.

Adventurous: If she's an adventurous woman it makes sense that she'd be looking for the same in a spouse. After all, I can't imagine anything more awful than being stuck at home with someone when I'd rather be out rock climbing.

So she had eight or nine things she was looking for, of which three (sexuality, unattached and kindness are givens). Of the remaining six, I don't see anything outrageous there. I also required that any guy I dated be non-racist/sexist/homophobic. I think anyone has the right to establish whatever criteria they like for someone that's going to be with them for life. I think it's crucial to examine yourself and potential mates very diligently. There are things that are on my list that wouldn't be on someone else's and vice-versa. But I certainly wouldn't slam anyone for what they have on their list. If someone says that a woman must have big breasts and be able to cook I think they should definitely go for what they like. Life's too short to be stuck with someone incompatible.

[anothertntony]

Originally Posted by RoslynHolcomb

I think anyone has the right to establish whatever criteria they like for someone that's going to be with them for life. I think it's crucial to examine yourself and potential mates very diligently. There are things that are on my list that wouldn't be on someone else's and vice-versa. But I certainly wouldn't slam anyone for what they have on their list. If someone says that a woman must have big breasts and be able to cook I think they should definitely go for what they like. Life's too short to be stuck with someone incompatible.

I completely agree.

I wasn't suggesting that she should change her list. After all, those are all perfectly reasonable qualities to pursue. I was, however, suggesting that she may never find someone meeting all of those criteria because most men do not meet them. People have every right to desire whatever makes them happy, but desire is not entitlement.

In any case, I hope she finds what she's looking for.

[Huckleberry3911948]

AA women got a bad hand of cards. Atlanta should be a good place to meet the right kind of men, lots of successful men there.
i think AA women are a good pick, stats show lower divorce rate than barbie doll.

[FlyiMetro]

Originally Posted by Huckleberry3911948

AA women got a bad hand of cards. Atlanta should be a good place to meet the right kind of men, lots of successful men there.
i think AA women are a good pick, stats show lower divorce rate than barbie doll.

You sound like a corporate boss....isnt the low divorce rate tied into their low marriage rate?

[tonygeorgia]

Yall see that lkobe wife is about to take him to the cleaners? This right here is one of the reasons men aren't rushing to get married