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It's amazing that 4 siblings agreed to keep the house for so long. In most families there is at least one sibling who is ready to sell the house after the last parent has passed and more than one who doesn't want to pay utilities and maintenance on a financial asset. They're more than ready to sell the house and get the money. It's wonderful that it could work well for you for so long.
>>I can't even think about the upcoming tax returns. I want to cry.<<
Surely your parents had an accountant who could handle that. If not, find an accountant who can handle their taxes.
Yes, thankfully they have an accountant and my dad keeps good records.
The thing is, my husband and I keep good records too, but it STILL takes me about a week to gather all the info for our accountant, and we just have one small consulting business and our personal return. I can't imagine how intense it's going to be gathering up my parents' info!!!!!! Oh well, I'll just start working on it a day at a time.
It's amazing that 4 siblings agreed to keep the house for so long. In most families there is at least one sibling who is ready to sell the house after the last parent has passed and more than one who doesn't want to pay utilities and maintenance on a financial asset. They're more than ready to sell the house and get the money. It's wonderful that it could work well for you for so long.
I think that's great too, in that situation. We had a similar situation for several decades, involving a family farm as well, and my granddad and his siblings.
However, in my parents' case, there's no need to keep the house so we'll sell it.
Ok, so I think I hear you saying you will turn over the latest and greatest financial info to your parent's accountant at tax time. Good.
After Mom gets happily settled, you will sell their house. Good and good.
One step at a time, and soon this will be behind you. The hot tub awaits.
Ok, so I think I hear you saying you will turn over the latest and greatest financial info to your parent's accountant at tax time. Good.
After Mom gets happily settled, you will sell their house. Good and good.
One step at a time, and soon this will be behind you. The hot tub awaits.
You are not kidding.
My husband was working out of town when my dad took a sudden turn for the worse (when he left, my dad was expected to leave the hospital for rehab in a few days). He only got to come home for the funeral and one day and then he went back to work so I've been handling most of this completely by myself.
He is coming home in a couple of days and I absolutely cannot wait. I need to snuggle up with him. I need to watch a movie with him and laugh and carry on and not think about this stuff for awhile.
But a day or two after he comes home, we're going to have to take my mom's three awful dogs to the vet to have them put down. Fun, huh? I've been trying (among all the other things) to get them adopted or placed in a shelter, but no luck. They are horrid little creatures - besides the fact that they are hyper and snappish, they are NOT EVEN HOUSEBROKEN and they are all over six years old. They also tear up the yard constantly. Totally unadoptable. So down they will go.
I don't like these dogs (and I'm a dog lover so that's really saying something), but I don't want to put them down. But I can't find another option.
It's your mom's fault the dogs haven't been trained and house broken. It's not on you, it's on her and your dad. What a shame for those poor pups.
I totally agree and that was one of the few things I differed with my dad about - and it was a significant difference. He knew how I felt about it too.
I loved my dad to pieces but one thing that was a huge flaw with him was that he would NOT stand up against my mom when she was wrong - and since she is mentally ill, she is often wrong and often wrong in some pretty serious ways. His excuse was always, "I don't like to fight," but what that really meant was "I don't like to be uncomfortable and when I try to enforce what's right with your mom, she makes my life uncomfortable."
My dad had a free standing office for his consulting business, which was adjacent to the house but not part of the house. He worked this business till the week he died. Anyway, this meant that my mom was alone in the house most of the time - with these dogs. And she simply would not discipline them. I never could get it. I mean, it's just not that hard to house break puppies but she simply wouldn't do it. This meant that their house stunk to high heaven of course. I couldn't understand how they didn't smell it. It got to the point where family just wouldn't come visit. It was that bad. I would occasionally pitch a wall eyed fit about this to my dad, who would shrug and say "What am I supposed to do about it?" I don't know - do SOMETHING.
They moved from that house two years ago and bought a brand spanking new house. At this point, I nearly laid down in the road in protest about the damn dogs. We couldn't even move a lot of their furniture because it reeked. They both swore they couldn't smell it, but I guess they believed their kids and grandkids who all jumped on that bandwagon with me. We were all so upset about the dogs that we were practically crying with frustration.
Finally, five years after getting the dogs, when they moved my dad insisted that the dogs be outside dogs and not be allowed in the house. (Did I mention that at that time they had FIVE dogs - all of whom were untrained?) So what this meant was that they put all five dogs into their small laundry room at night, and then let them all out in the morning and they stay outside all day, digging up the yard, escaping under the fence, etc. Their back yard looks like a disaster area. And you can't walk out there without dogs propelling themselves on you and barking shrilly. IT IS INSANE.
In March, when my mom was letting the herd of dogs out of the laundry room in the morning, she tripped on them and fell and broke her hip and nearly died.
At that point - literally the point of DEATH - my dad did manage to get two of the five dogs adopted out. This left the last three - who are simply unadoptable for a variety of reasons. And see - I would have loaded up those last three and taken them across that Rainbow Bridge RIGHT THEN - but of course, my dad wouldn't do it - because my mother was crying and protesting it.
Now my mom is obsessed with these dogs (Mental illness strikes again). What she does all day every day is let the dogs in and out of the laundry room. This means that they are constantly running around her ankles and feet. If I don't get those damn dogs out of there, they are going to make her fall AGAIN.
It is an insane situation but that's what you get with a parent who is mentally ill.
Know how I got my mom to agree to let me "take the dogs to the vet one last time?" All I did was say, "Let's get you a cat." Then I found a cat that is housebroken already. A friend of mine is holding this cute little cat till my mom moves in. The cat is already neutered and has her shots! She is a loving little cat too. I can empty the litter box if my mom doesn't do it, when I visit which will be several times a week. So there you go. And if my mom passes away while she still has the cat, I'll take the cat. I love cats.
I also love dogs - so this whole dog ordeal has been very upsetting to me - for years.
Anyway, so now my mom is very excited about the cat. She has two pictures of her, and she has already named her, and every day she asks me, "When can we go see my little cat?" (The cat is about thirty minutes away so who knows - maybe one day this week.) Anyway, now that she's got this cat in her head, she is DONE with the dogs.
I feel so badly for them. But they were ruined from the start.
Oh boy, I hope none of the whacky dog people in the pets section see this. You are doing the right thing. Sometimes, being responsible means doing the hardest thing.
Oh boy, I hope none of the whacky dog people in the pets section see this. You are doing the right thing. Sometimes, being responsible means doing the hardest thing.
LOL they can bring it on. I've been trying for two weeks to get these dogs adopted out. And I am not going to take them on myself - I already have two rescue dogs, both of whom are house broken, happy, and healthy. My neighborhood only allows two dogs per family anyway.
The kindest thing I can think of to do is take them to their vet and have them put down. I don't anticipate a problem with this. I'm about to call the vet right now in fact.
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