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I've read this entire thread and have come to the conclusion that Chicago is definatly for me. I am relocating in June from Memphis Tn. and the personality and energy of Chicago is whats drawing me (other than my job). I am an up front person that believes in keeping it real and I have had a tough time socially and professionally in Memphis because of that. I guess it goes to show that a city is what you make of it but one would have to choose a place that is conducive to their lifestyle.
Good Luck. The city is indeed awesome......you might be used to the limited offerings of beale st., but Chicago has infinitely more of a music scene than that. And the beaches, nightlife, restaurants, lake shore drive jogging paths, and on and on.......trust me, you will love it!
Last edited by scongress1234; 04-10-2008 at 02:57 PM..
I read over parts of this thread and felt compelled to reply. I've been speaking to other friends about this same subject...regarding the "nice nature" of Chicago residents. I've heard people say it many times....wow, I've heard the people are so nice there.
Of course, I don't want to generalize, but to tell ya the truth, they aren't. There are for more hospitable and welcoming towns and cities around the country than Chicago. If you want to compare urban to urban or look at it based on size compared to another city, thats your business. I'm simply stating that I've personally witnessed and felt far more welcome in other cities than Chicago. So, what do I mean by that. People are generally more friendly, outgoing, putting up less of a front, more willing to talk to someone new, more polite, etc.
I've said this about a thousand times, but how friendly or nice do you expect people to be in a city where everything costs twice as much and takes twice as long to get. Traffic is awful, housing and food costs are high, crime and corruption are plentiful, areas are overcrowded, parking is a mess, public transpo issues, etc. How nice would you feel like being?
Of course Chicago does have many great aspects. Lovely views, food, attractions, sports, sights, etc. Its a personal decision if those things you enjoy outweigh the negatives. However, anyone touting that the people here as a whole are just delightful is full of it, in my opinion.
Depends what you mean by "nice". Nice is a superficial, salutory mannerism. People are "nice" in Austin, or Toronto, or Minneapolis, but try digging deeper than greeting someone, and you will find them to be just as clammed up and hard to get to know, not to mention self-centered, as anyone else. Big cities like NYC and Chicago are actually more genuine and earthy, though they may seem somewhat frontal and bruque at first. Ironically, they go deeper and are easier to truly get to know after all is said and done, while in Minnesota, Austin, and Toronto, you won't get much past the smile and innocuous, meaningless "You Bet", or "How Y'all doing"? Just try carrying on a deep conversation with people in the superficially "nice" cities and see how far you get. I would rather have a heavy chat with someone brusque, than a nothing conversation with a superficial "nice" person, with the cognitive stimulation of speaking with an idiot savant.
Depends what you mean by "nice". Nice is a superficial, salutory mannerism. People are "nice" in Austin, or Toronto, or Minneapolis, but try digging deeper than greeting someone, and you will find them to be just as clammed up and hard to get to know, not to mention self-centered, as anyone else. Big cities like NYC and Chicago are actually more genuine and earthy, though they may seem somewhat frontal and bruque at first. Ironically, they go deeper and are easier to truly get to know after all is said and done, while in Minnesota, Austin, and Toronto, you won't get much past the smile and innocuous, meaningless "You Bet", or "How Y'all doing"? Just try carrying on a deep conversation with people in the superficially "nice" cities and see how far you get. I would rather have a heavy chat with someone brusque, than a nothing conversation with a superficial "nice" person, with the cognitive stimulation of speaking with an idiot savant.
Depends what you mean by "nice". Nice is a superficial, salutory mannerism. People are "nice" in Austin, or Toronto, or Minneapolis, but try digging deeper than greeting someone, and you will find them to be just as clammed up and hard to get to know, not to mention self-centered, as anyone else. Big cities like NYC and Chicago are actually more genuine and earthy, though they may seem somewhat frontal and bruque at first. Ironically, they go deeper and are easier to truly get to know after all is said and done, while in Minnesota, Austin, and Toronto, you won't get much past the smile and innocuous, meaningless "You Bet", or "How Y'all doing"? Just try carrying on a deep conversation with people in the superficially "nice" cities and see how far you get. I would rather have a heavy chat with someone brusque, than a nothing conversation with a superficial "nice" person, with the cognitive stimulation of speaking with an idiot savant.
aha! another Tennessean has been lured in by Chicago.
I've never considered myself a Tennessean. I grew up in St. Louis and lived in N. Carolina for a while. But never have felt Tennessee is a place to call home.
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Good Luck. The city is indeed awesome......you might be used to the limited offerings of beale st., but Chicago has infinitely more of a music scene than that. And the beaches, nightlife, restaurants, lake shore drive jogging paths, and on and on.......trust me, you will love it!
Beale st is not a representation of Memphis as a whole. Its a tourist destination (a very good one at that) but it doesn't represent the true culture of the region. Its going to be a challenge during the first winter but hopefully I will make it ok. Other than that I don't think there will be any issues with adjusting.
It's sad that people are labeling niceness as "superficial" and rudeness as organic. To me this is just a justification for rude behavior. I find it hard to believe, that people would prefer to see someone walking down the street with a frown on their face, rather than a smile. I'm also sure people would prefer for someone to hold the door open when they walk through it, instead of slamming it their face. Unless of course, one is trying to justify their own behavior.
Last edited by technobarbie; 04-11-2008 at 07:34 AM..
Well I can honestly say I've only had one person slam a door in my face in Chicago and it was by a tourist on Michigan Ave.
I don't really give a crap if someone else smiles or frowns - what business is that of mine and how does that make them rude? I think you are definitely better off where you are then. Oh and btw- I had one of the worst experiences of my life in Jacksonville airport with the single rudest person I may have ever met- so your home sweet home isn't exactly full of daisies and unicorns as you might like us to think.
mjtinmemphis: I am sure after years in North Carolina and Tennessee Chicago's winters will be an adjustment, but I haven't found it too much terribly harder than St. Louis, so if you can remember what that's like just subtract 6 degrees and add some more snowfall. Where in St. Louis did you grow up?
It's sad that people are labeling niceness as "superficial" and rudeness as organic. To me this is just a justification for rude behavior. I find it hard to believe, that people would prefer to see someone walking down the street with a frown on their face, rather than a smile. I'm also sure people would prefer for someone to hold the door open when they walk through it, instead of slamming it their face. Unless of course, one is trying to justify their own behavior.
Naw, you misinterpret what he's saying, technobarbie. He's talking about when people are being nice for the sake of being nice and do not mean anything genuine behind it. I've been in MN for 14 years (I take frequent trips out of the state) and I've seen it done all the time. Hell, I've even done it myself. It's weird when I try to be nice to someone and say "Hi" when I really don't mean anything behind it. Sometimes I'll try hard to be nice to someone when I don't have any genuine interest in them and then wonder why I did it? It's also frustrating to walk past a pretty girl, have her smile at you, maybe say hi to you, try to strike up a conversation with her, only to find out she was just "being nice".
I think nice is something people who are overly-sensitive do when they feel awkward in the simplest situations. Walking past someone, making eye contact with them, and then just saying, "hi" is something a person does when they feel awkward and uncomfortable. It has nothing deep in it.
So I think scongress is talking about how having genuine feelings toward a person is better than being "nice" just to keep the peace.
It's sad that people are labeling niceness as "superficial" and rudeness as organic. To me this is just a justification for rude behavior. I find it hard to believe, that people would prefer to see someone walking down the street with a frown on their face, rather than a smile. I'm also sure people would prefer for someone to hold the door open when they walk through it, instead of slamming it their face. Unless of course, one is trying to justify their own behavior.
I'm just emphasizing that it doesn't go very deep. In Chicago and NYC, you can find help when you really need it. People are a little more attuned to what is going on, and more quick to take action. You will get the same help or advice as the nice cities, but just not couched in a facecious grin. AND, you will get to know people far more deeply in the denser, bigger cities, as they have more people skills, by simply encountering more people on a daily basis. I strongly believe "nice" in the "nice" cities is as much about fear than anything else. What does a chimp do when he fears an encounter? He grins in a plastered, grimacy sort of way. That connotates fear, and the attempt to appease a threat. So, really, nice is nothing but a disarming of a stranger, to preclude aggression. Chicagoans and New Yorkers don't have that same fear, so they have the freedom to appear as they choose. As most of us really don't give a hoot about the person next to us, we pass them without a thought, our mind preoccupied with more pressing concerns, like family and work issues. Suffice it to say, indeed folks in large cities don't walk around with plastered smiles on their face, but, if you need help, it will be immediate in NYC or Chicago, and you will have FAR deeper converstions with people.......not "you betcha" or "Super!"....
BTW, nice can sometimes have evil connotations....think William Macy in Fargo for one example.....
Last edited by scongress1234; 04-11-2008 at 09:01 AM..
Naw, you misinterpret what he's saying, technobarbie. He's talking about when people are being nice for the sake of being nice and do not mean anything genuine behind it. I've been in MN for 14 years (I take frequent trips out of the state) and I've seen it done all the time. Hell, I've even done it myself. It's weird when I try to be nice to someone and say "Hi" when I really don't mean anything behind it. Sometimes I'll try hard to be nice to someone when I don't have any genuine interest in them and then wonder why I did it? It's also frustrating to walk past a pretty girl, have her smile at you, maybe say hi to you, try to strike up a conversation with her, only to find out she was just "being nice".
I think nice is something people who are overly-sensitive do when they feel awkward in the simplest situations. Walking past someone, making eye contact with them, and then just saying, "hi" is something a person does when they feel awkward and uncomfortable. It has nothing deep in it.
So I think scongress is talking about how having genuine feelings toward a person is better than being "nice" just to keep the peace.
Re-read my two previous post. His response was sabout nice cities v/s rude cities - at least that is the way I took it. I never mentioned Chicago in that post. For the record I lived in Chicago (McClurg Court specifically) for a few years, before moving the the North burbs. Also an airport is not a good place to judge locals by, and I don't consider Jacksonville "home sweet home". I work in the travel industry and used to work for an airline.
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