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I agree with this post, it's right on.............the only ones who think the anti bullying movement is overplayed are those who've never been bullied........NO kid should have to attend school in fear, and then be expected to learn at the same time.
Or, they WERE the bullies in school. I was the smart, short, painfully skinny girl who was teased & harrassed throughout my elementary years. I hated school, even though I excelled & got the best grades of all my peers, including the bullies.
FWIW, I was small & weak & couldn't fight back. Also, I do take some satisfaction in that my life turned out pretty good, &, all those who weren't so nice to me, not so much. Yes, I'm a vindictive bi**h. lol
I do not tolerate bullying to or from my kids. My son was ganged up on, but he fought back, &, no issues since. My daughter, she was calling a boy a 'baby', along w/ her best friend. Yes, innocent, but I nipped that right away. Even though, she likes the boy & says he 'wants' them to call him that. =P
Call me overprotective, but I am a momma bear w/ my kids. Though, I really do need to back off & let my kids 'battle' their own 'fights'. I just can't help but protect. Heck, I even admonish kids when they bully kids who aren't mine, if no one else does. I did that to a kid who his Dad turned out to be my son's little league coach. lol I still don't think he knows. lol
Or, they WERE the bullies in school. I was the smart, short, painfully skinny girl who was teased & harrassed throughout my elementary years. I hated school, even though I excelled & got the best grades of all my peers, including the bullies.
FWIW, I was small & weak & couldn't fight back. Also, I do take some satisfaction in that my life turned out pretty good, &, all those who weren't so nice to me, not so much. Yes, I'm a vindictive bi**h. lol
I do not tolerate bullying to or from my kids. My son was ganged up on, but he fought back, &, no issues since. My daughter, she was calling a boy a 'baby', along w/ her best friend. Yes, innocent, but I nipped that right away. Even though, she likes the boy & says he 'wants' them to call him that. =P
Call me overprotective, but I am a momma bear w/ my kids. Though, I really do need to back off & let my kids 'battle' their own 'fights'. I just can't help but protect. Heck, I even admonish kids when they bully kids who aren't mine, if no one else does. I did that to a kid who his Dad turned out to be my son's little league coach. lol I still don't think he knows. lol
Not trying to be psychologist of CD but it seems like the overprotective ways that you're showing your kids is because of how you was treated by your peers when you was a kid, but I think I'm stating the obvious lol the virgo analyze trait can't help it
But yeah the bullying thing seems to just baby most of the kids, I think its kind of like a rite of passage for every child to experience bullying of some sort and overcome it not to cave in and tell an adult, except for the serious cases, I suppose ...
Not trying to be psychologist of CD but it seems like the overprotective ways that you're showing your kids is because of how you was treated by your peers when you was a kid, but I think I'm stating the obvious lol the virgo analyze trait can't help it
But yeah the bullying thing seems to just baby most of the kids, I think its kind of like a rite of passage for every child to experience bullying of some sort and overcome it not to cave in and tell an adult, except for the serious cases, I suppose ...
I know you might find it ironic, but I do agree w/ you. I want to 'toughen up' my son. However the 'bullies' on my son's baseball team, the worst I stood up to his Mom (who, 'shock' is also a bully) , & she sputtered an intelligiable response that someone actually didn't just bow down & agree w/ her. Most bullies tend to not know what to do if anyone questions them.
FWIW, maybe it's just Utah, backwards, but, that is how many do it here, we encourage everyone to be nice & not bully others ('wow', what a concept) . Yes, I'm sure I'm sensitive, since I was bullied. I'm from Ohio (hence my username ) .
No, I don't think kids have a right to 'go postal' because of bullying.....perhaps the 'parents' of the bullies could actually parent & not defend or deflect.
I think that bullying is bigger then alot of people make it to be, i recently graduated high school and found out you NEVER really leave high school. Adults act like teenagers, and they bully certain people. We can say toughen up or its your fault for letting it happen but we all know that we have felt attacked by others for no reason....and no one stands up for you no matter who you are thats happened at least once in your life! I can be humble and true and can count the times on my hand that i have been bullied...but i have seen ALOT of bullying, and i am ashamed to say i dont say anything! I let that person get bullied because i dont feel its my place to say anything. I think we all need to be there for each other but this world has become "dog eat dog" so i know that will never happen. So i can tell someone who constantly gets bullied this most bullies are smart and know who they can "attack" so if you are getting constanly "attack" ask your self why....its usually something your insercure about your looks, your grades, your family and so and so...bullies see this weakness and pounch, learn to be confident and take that power away from them! I have always been a looks kinda guy....no matter what i could say i looked good. You couldnt call me fat, you couldnt call me not good looking, you couldnt say i stink, etc. So i was okay....but recently i have entered a situation where people think there smarter then me just because they have degrees.....im screwed and unconfindent in that area. Yes i am smart BUT i just found out what i want to go to school for, at 19 thats not that bad but i have self very rude, arrogant, and self entilted people saying RUDE things to me. For a while they saw that i was unconfident in that area but you HAVE to take your power back and professionaly tell them off . Now this is the HARD part bullies LIVE for reactions....they want you to go crazy, they love for you to cry, and they like to see you just let them beat you down...umm no you are worth more then that dont give up! So people getting bullied tell HR at your job, or go tell a school counsler, or your parents...its not you being weak its you knowing that you dont deserve to be treated that way. And if none of those people help keep going....get your voice heard! You are worth more then you can ever imanige and those bullies know that about you and dont want you to see that, they like taking your power. So now i know i look good and dress nice...but am telling my bullies to back off, i know i am intelligent and am going to school soon.....TAKE BACK YOUR POWER. End rant lol
I don't agree with bullying, but the fact is, there is absolutely no way to stop it. I think it's much more important to teach kids how to respond to bullying by standing up for themselves. Teach a kid self esteem and self respect, and you'll never have to worry how many people are watching that PSA.
First of all I will say that I don't condone bullying at all. No one should have to fear for their safety just for being themselves, no matter how different they are.
Still, there is a fine line between disliking but tolerating a behavior and bullying. Obviously, physical abuse is bullying. Vandalizing property is bullying. Is the passive aggressive behavior of completely ignoring the presence of someone bullying? Is referring to someone by a juvenile nickname bullying? Is excluding someone from a private activity bullying? According to some definitions, all of these behaviors can be violations and schools, sports teams, clubs, etc. can be held liable if they don't put a stop to them.
When I was younger and my brother would do something dumb to annoy me like blowing a kazoo in my ear, my parents would tell me to ignore him and he would stop. I have found this to be good advice, as generally people that are seeking my negative attention will give up when they realize they will not get it. After attending a workshop on bullying, I am offended that this advice can get a kid in trouble if they do it at school, as even passively ignoring or refraining from speaking with someone can be interpreted as abuse. I think this is B.S. and takes attention and resources away from situations where true abuse is happening. I know some kids don't get enough attention and act out in order to get attention, however negative it may be. By criminalizing a passive response to this, we are creating an arms race where exceedingly antisocial and or vulgar behavior is required for those individuals to get the negative attention they are seeking.
passive ignoring? this is something the schools have a problem with?
wasn't life so much more normal before this pop-psych crap came along?
o.k., now that I've vented a little...
I agree with every point you made, plus have a couple to add:
first, when you turn your child over to the school each day, you should be able to be reasonably sure no harm will come to him... from my experiences, physical bullying would not have had the chance to occur if teachers had spent more time in the classroom and playground, and less time hanging out in the teacher's lounge. supervising their students is part of their job.
second, re: the overboard view of bullying- I'm guessing somebody, somewhere along the line, took it to court... meaning I'll bet much of today's anti-bullying policies/education/etc. are due more to fear of lawsuits than concern for students.
it's way overplayed. A person who is cyberstalking another can just claim that they are the one being cyberstalked by making up things on internet message boards and printing them out (sockpuppet accounts). This has happened to me.
it's way overplayed. A person who is cyberstalking another can just claim that they are the one being cyberstalked by making up things on internet message boards and printing them out (sockpuppet accounts). This has happened to me.
Passive Aggression par excellence! People can and will play all kinds of head games with you in cyberspace.
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I did that to a kid who his Dad turned out to be my son's little league coach. lol I still don't think he knows. lol
lol the virgo analyze trait can't help it
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Bullying
. Now this is the HARD part bullies LIVE for reactions....they want you to go crazy, they love for you to cry, and they like to see you just let them beat you down...umm no you are worth more then that dont give up! 
