Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I knew one of you would appear. The “life comes to an end when you have a baby!” type. I have plenty of examples around me who have shown that life can go on just as you wish it to once you have a kid. I also have plenty of the naysayers, much like yourself...who, ironically, all live in places that are as exciting as a popcorn fart. You may find it hard to believe, but there are plenty of folks who live in places where they might have to pay a babysitter. Thank you for the extremely helpful response, though. Lol.
I think the sentiment generally comes from when activities before the baby comes are not baby friendly.
I knew one of you would appear. The “life comes to an end when you have a baby!” type. I have plenty of examples around me who have shown that life can go on just as you wish it to once you have a kid. I also have plenty of the naysayers, much like yourself...who, ironically, all live in places that are as exciting as a popcorn fart. You may find it hard to believe, but there are plenty of folks who live in places where they might have to pay a babysitter. Thank you for the extremely helpful response, though. Lol.
I think the point was that your kid math looks a lot better if you have grandparents nearby since regular babysitters piled on top of daycare or dropping to a single income ends up being a large expense. Not necessarily Mansfield but something that it wouldn't be an awful drive for your grandparents to spend an evening or weekend at your house as a regular thing or where you can drop your kid on the way into Boston for an evening.
Some other ideas that are within striking distance of Stoughton? The coastal towns at the bottom of Route 24 and 24/140. It's a way easier drive than I-95 through Providence.
New Bedford has a music/arts pulse. Good roads to Stoughton when it's not rush hour. The whole rural/semi-rural Farm Coast region is just west of there for your farm to table fix. Mattapoisett a few miles east has a strong elementary school system for 5 or 6 years from now and your kid(s) can grow up with a beach/sailing/fishing coastal village life. Providence is a half hour.
Maybe Portsmouth RI. Much easier access to Stoughton down Route 24 compared to Bristol/Warren that were on your list. Newport has a music scene. There's a bit in Fall River. Providence is within range.
There's also 24/495 but around the Bourne Bridge is pretty dead.
None of that gets you closer to Saratoga Springs but you're within 40 miles with limited access highway driving from Stoughton and it's not 128.
You can certainly do Providence until you have to figure out the school system. That's a 2024 decision you don't have to make now.
You may want to look into Norwood. It's not the full blown "Somerville" experience, but they do have enough ethnic grocery and food, a charming square with theater, A music and arts center (Space Center). For sure a close ride to Stoughton.
You may want to look into Norwood. It's not the full blown "Somerville" experience, but they do have enough ethnic grocery and food, a charming square with theater, A music and arts center (Space Center). For sure a close ride to Stoughton.
Worth a shot.
Dude can drive to Norwood in 20 minutes and IMO someone who can't stand Mansfield won't be any happier in Norwood.
You'd be stupid to leave Mansfield IMO. You have potential free baby sitting a 15 minute drive away in Stoughton.
You won't have time to do all this cool crap you seem to care about once the kid comes, unless you have babysitting.
You don't like the 6 hour drive, but if you move equidistant you'll be doing a 3 hour drive more often. And once the kid comes you'll be pressured alot into seeing everyone more than you do now.
This is nonsense, I live in Somerville with kids and go out all the time. Whether its drinks with other parents from the school, live music, the local independent theater or dinner. When things are right in your backyard, you tend to take advantage of them much more often than if they are even just a few miles away. For example friends in Belmont like to say “we’re 10 minutes from Harvard Square”, yet they never go there. But when you are a 7 minute WALK to Davis or Union Square it’s a different story. When you live IN the community where everything is happening, people in that community tend to take advantage of it. Dads from our school hang out at Remnant brewing after the kids go to bed regularly. And so many live music options.
Secondly its much easier to go places with the kids. Take them to the farmers market, the many street festivals, the movies. And when they get older they gain an independence to walk places that suburban kids only dream of.
Great Barrington and Burlington are great. I would just be a bit wary of the tourist culture in GB especially in the summer. It feels like the New Yorkers outnumber the locals sometimes. And Burlington has REALLY short summers.
Last edited by semiurbanite; 09-26-2019 at 02:29 PM..
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dm84
OP isn't really looking for advice, unless it fits his narrative. Remember, life won't change at all once the kid comes.
He is looking for advice on what he is requesting advice on, not people telling him they should change what they value in life and how to live it. No shortage of couples (or even single parents) out there with infants/toddlers enjoying life going to, or playing in, music fests... or creating and participating in art, engaging in community events, heck, the modern brewery scene is usually family friendly (including pets). Some people, when a child or children comes along, completely change their values and lifestyle. Others, do not.
There is lots of imposing on this forum, and generally from pretty conservative elements. Heck, there is a whole swath of people here that think people in their 40s and 50s going out to shows multiple times a week, or art openings, is weird or that the person isn't willing to "mature" or that they're an outlier at these events. For the people out doing those things, its hilarious how off base those commentaries are. My brother heard that quite a bit from the more sedentary side of my family (nothing like receiving unsolicited advice... he was thrilled, but diplomatic, he has that gift)... he won't have time to play in bands, to be in sports leagues, to see shows... EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE, well, fast forward, one of my nephew's starting sophomore year in college next year, the other will be a freshman in college next year... so 18 or so years later (and when they (brother and SIL) are firmly in their 50s, still going strong.
Of course, if people want to chill out more, work on their yards, watch TV more or read more and go out less... out of either choice or just because they're more tired and don't have a desire to be out at midnight or whatever, that's fine too...
I get where he is coming from. If places like Burlington VT are his place, a place like Mansfield will be soul sucking. For others, Mansfield would be perfect. Life is too short to stay where one is unhappy.
He is looking for advice on what he is requesting advice on, not people telling him they should change what they value in life and how to live it. No shortage of couples (or even single parents) out there with infants/toddlers enjoying life going to, or playing in, music fests... or creating and participating in art, engaging in community events, heck, the modern brewery scene is usually family friendly (including pets). Some people, when a child or children comes along, completely change their values and lifestyle. Others, do not.
There is lots of imposing on this forum, and generally from pretty conservative elements. Heck, there is a whole swath of people here that think people in their 40s and 50s going out to shows multiple times a week, or art openings, is weird or that the person isn't willing to "mature" or that they're an outlier at these events. For the people out doing those things, its hilarious how off base those commentaries are. My brother heard that quite a bit from the more sedentary side of my family (nothing like receiving unsolicited advice... he was thrilled, but diplomatic, he has that gift)... he won't have time to play in bands, to be in sports leagues, to see shows... EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE, well, fast forward, one of my nephew's starting sophomore year in college next year, the other will be a freshman in college next year... so 18 or so years later (and when they (brother and SIL) are firmly in their 50s, still going strong.
Of course, if people want to chill out more, work on their yards, watch TV more or read more and go out less... out of either choice or just because they're more tired and don't have a desire to be out at midnight or whatever, that's fine too...
I get where he is coming from. If places like Burlington VT are his place, a place like Mansfield will be soul sucking. For others, Mansfield would be perfect. Life is too short to stay where one is unhappy.
The point is given the other factors OP mentioned, it's questionable whether moving 3 months before a baby comes will really be beneficial. And yes, your life changes when you have kids. Anyone who says it doesn't, doesn't have kids. Yes, he'll have time to do all the things he loves, but probably not nearly as much of it as he has now. Yes families do fun stuff, but it's a lot more work and requires more planning then it does when it's just 2 adults. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but it's a thing.
I get that OP is in denial about this. That's fine, we all were, but seeing as he's about to become a stay at home dad, I think he really needs to think hard about what's most important for the next few years instead of defiantly stating that nothing is going to change and that what's important to him now will be exactly the same once the kid is here.
Anyway, my opinion doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. Not my problem.
Dude can drive to Norwood in 20 minutes and IMO someone who can't stand Mansfield won't be any happier in Norwood.
I can drive to Walpole in 20 mins from Mattapan. Whats your point? The guy hates Mansfield for the lack of culture. Just saying, Norwood may have a little more to offer without such a drastic move.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
