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A few weeks ago I was talking to two good friends of mine that are both in the Army and have been for years. They have also done tours in Iraq. I remember telling them how proud I am for their service and then they said thanks but that they really don't like it when strangers have done so. So we talked for a bit about it and there were two main reasons given why going up to some random soldier and thanking them for their service isn't always a good idea:
1. It draws unwanted attention and makes many feel uncomfortable, especially when they are just trying to eat or go about their day especially since many of them just feel as if they're just doing their job.
2. The person you are thanking for their service may actually be a real douche bag and I was even told you go up to a random soldier and thank them for their service you're just as likely to get someone who is lazy/incompetent and an overall bad soldier as you are one that is hard working/competent and an overall good one. Admittedly I had never thought of this before. I have thought about the above and not wanting to disturb them though.
Of course I do appreciate all the hard work you all do, I just was curious how the military men/women here feel about it.
It made me uncomfortable because that wasn't why I went in the Army (to be thanked, it was my job). But I DID appreciate the effort people made to say this.
When I see people in uniform today, I thank them as well; because I am grateful for their service and understand what they went through.
I am a bit embarrassed. I never know what to say. I served during peacetime and I joined for selfish reasons-I joined for the pay & benefits. I don't think of my time in was that much of a sacrifice-unlike the men & women who are in today serving multiple tours in combat. I feel undeserving of the thanks.
As a Viet Nam Era Medic I have always felt great when someone said thank you for your service ,but I felt equally good
in thanking a peer for THEIR service . The VA has always been a logical place for such community as I refer to it . When
I had lab work the tech thanked me for my service and at the risk of sounding dramatic it was the infancy for how I came
to love and respect VA again for THEIR service . After some 40 years later I actually applied for my medals not that I was
uninterested I remember all the injured and maimed boots on the ground who I felt really deserved what is a small token
of recognition. I thank THEM for THEIR sacrifice and yes I did nice too.
1. It draws unwanted attention and makes many feel uncomfortable, especially when they are just trying to eat or go about their day especially since many of them just feel as if they're just doing their job.
This is my primary thought. In hindsight, it is better than how many Vietnam vets were treated, but as an introvert I'd rather just be left alone.
I would never be angry or upset with someone for well-wishing, however. Many people couldn't for whatever reason be in the service and feel that this is a way to acknowledge others. I thank them for their well-wishes in a respectful manner and move on.
My brother is considered to be one of those peace time Marines. Absolutely no living souls have thanked him for his service. My family is very proud of him because of his dedication and accomplishment, no more, no less.
I always sent him a card on Veterans day and let him know that I appreciate him for what he has done and I also called him a hero. The card always puts a smile on his face but he always tells me that he is never a hero, we all know who the true heroes are.
I have many combat Marine friends and when I say "Thank you for your service." They always say "You are welcome" or "Thank you for your support." because they know I am being genuine.
I have thanked various members of the military for their service. I have not asked them to stop and chat, nor have I insisted on knowing their names or where they are serving/have served. Just a quiet "thank you" as we passed one another. Perhaps we should all begin saying "Thank you and I'm sorry"?
For every serviceperson who insists it's embarrassing to be thanked, there is one who will state that no one has ever thanked them. I'd rather err on the side of gratitude.
I always thank service men and women in public and never considered that it might embarrass them. Every male in my family has served or is serving in the military and I think the good ones far outweigh the "bad" ones. I thank police officers (except one particularly abusive one I met a few months ago) for their work as well because these people put their lives on the line every day so I can live in a democratic society. With the invention of the internet, we are all privy to circumstances all around the world and it makes me more appreciative of being an American citizen. No, it's not utopia or perfect, but it's seemingly much better than many other places in the world. I have never tried to engage a military person in a conversation in public, but I imagine being thanked is a heck of a lot better than being admonished or ridiculed (like what happened to many Vietnam veterans).
As a Canadian Forces veteran ( 30 years service, 1966 to 1999 ) I have had that said to me, by strangers, usually around Remembrance Day ( November 11th here in Canada ).
I volunteer with the Royal Canadian Legion, which is our national veteran's association. I would be dressed in the RCL dress uniform, wearing my "rack " and asking the public make a donation, and to wear a poppy, as a sign of mourning and honour. Of the 34 million people who live in Canada, about 20 million buy and wear a poppy at Remembrance time, each year. The money raised goes directly to Legion programs for veterans, of any age . I all ways point out to the public that Canada now has "young veterans " as well as the WW2 , and Korea era guys.
Most people know that Canada has been deeply involved since the 1950's in both NATO and UN peace keeping, or peace making, in some situations, but only another experienced CF man or woman will be able to trace my career, based on my decorations. My Military Police cap badge is unique in appearance, a totem pole, with a wreath of maple leafs, worn on a bright red beret. Most folks don't know what it is.
When I see a younger male, who has an amputation, I take a closer look, and usually I can tell that he is ex CF military. I try to make conversation and usually begin with "what unit were you with '? If he comes back with the nick name of one of the CF land force units, like the Pats, Van Doos, or Royals, or The Straths, I can talk about his service. With a smaller military force like ours, many times this young guy knows people that I know, or places that we both were stationed at.
If I see a current CF member, who is in uniform, and I see that he/she has a medal for bravery in action, I make a effort to speak to them , and quietly acknowledge their courage. Our system of military awards is pretty stingy about who gets what. I know people that served for a very long time, in multiple combat rotations , who have two or three campaign medals, all of the "I was there " type.
When somebody thanks me for my service, I simply say, "You're welcome."
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