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This is just a BAD idea. Many years ago my parents put me in kindergarden when I was just 4 1/2 years old and most of my classmates were a year older than I was. I was always the youngest and most immature in my class and to this day I resent my parents decision to start me out too soon. There is a big difference in child development between 4 and 5 year olds.
You only get one chance to start your child off on the right foot.
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and my dad with an april birthday started the year before he should've and did well (in fact they wanted to skip him). this is VERY child specific and one size does not fit all.
but those instances are very specific to those children. I believe that the school year cut off should either be the first day of school or the end of the calendar year.
as for readiness... well, I'm in an interesting position of having twins. I know even now, at age 3, that one will be more than ready. In fact, she's already reading.
The other tests (they are evaluated by development specialist every 3 months as part of a preemie study) right on the money of her real age.
If, when the time comes, one isnt absolutely ready, I would have no issue keeping them both out for another year.
If, however, they are both ready, they ARE both going even if I have to pay the damn bridge everyday for 2 years.
i have twins too and was in this position. it was recommended i hold my one son back (may birthday) and let the other go ahead. talk about agony. I couldn't do it - he would've been by far the oldest AND biggest (he's a tall kid). i felt his issues were not because of immaturity (he was and still is a VERY social kid), by keeping him back we were going to face the same thing, just a year later. we decided to send them both to private all day kindy - 10 kids in the class and if, after the year was up, it was PAINFULLY obvious he was lagging behind, deal with it at that time.
well, he was ok - not a shining star, but doing well enough where it would be a disservice to not let him go forward. fast forward a few years later, and he does get special help in reading, but he's by far the most advanced in his group. His social skills are way ahead of his age, and I know we made the right decision.
A good friend told me - "The smartest kid in Kindy is the oldest kid. The smartest kid in 3rd grade is the smartest kid". I firmly believe that.
Every parent should make the right decision for their kid. If there are no issues and the child has a later birthday, send 'em. Don't redshirt for the hell of it. Someone's got to be the youngest! My boys, again, May birthdays, are younger than 90% of their class. Stats say that shouldn't be possible, but it is. Redshirting's out of control, IMHO.
ETA = why is this an issue now? Back in "our" day - you made the cutoff, you went. No questions asked.
I don't think this thread is about red-shirting as much as starting kids early. I am opposed to red-shirting. I'm also opposed to early starts. There is enough variation in kids w/o having some very young or very old ones in the class, especially at the younger ages. There is way more difference between a four year old and a five year old than a fourteen yr old and a fifteen yr old.
Maybe we should let 16 year olds drive to school in Sept. because they will be 17 in Dec.
Of course a 20 year old is old enough to drink on New years eve, why should they be penalized because thay were born in January. The same holds true for voting we all know that teenagers are smarter than their parents so why should we make them wait until their 18th birthday to vote.
I say let's keep it simple, your kid is 5 on Sept 1 he goes to school if not see you next year.
Please keep in mind that school is also very different than when most of us were children. What we did in second grade, is very often expected in Kindergarten now. That has to be considered.
All the years I taught, I never had a parent regret keeping their summer 5s (as these children are called born in July-cut off date) home an extra year, but I did have parents who wished they did.
My summer baby, with all the delays he has, will not be going to K when he is able. It has nothing to do with wanting him to be ahead in athletics or academics (that is plain ignorant to say) but because he is delayed in many areas and will not be ready for the expectations placed on children now.
It is up to a parent when they send a child, but parents need to decide based on the child's needs NOT on their needs (ie, not wanting to pay for daycare)....
Please keep in mind that school is also very different than when most of us were children. What we did in second grade, is very often expected in Kindergarten now. That has to be considered. All the years I taught, I never had a parent regret keeping their summer 5s (as these children are called born in July-cut off date) home an extra year, but I did have parents who wished they did.
My summer baby, with all the delays he has, will not be going to K when he is able. It has nothing to do with wanting him to be ahead in athletics or academics (that is plain ignorant to say) but because he is delayed in many areas and will not be ready for the expectations placed on children now.
It is up to a parent when they send a child, but parents need to decide based on the child's needs NOT on their needs (ie, not wanting to pay for daycare)....
believe it or not, i know someone who waited and regretted it. that line always makes me think of her. she ended up skipping her dd's to the next grade and they thrived (nov b'day with a 12/31 cutoff).
i'm not advocating one way or the other. all things being equal (and the child has no issues) - if the kid makes the cut off - send 'em. otherwise, wait.
Please keep in mind that school is also very different than when most of us were children. What we did in second grade, is very often expected in Kindergarten now. That has to be considered.
All the years I taught, I never had a parent regret keeping their summer 5s (as these children are called born in July-cut off date) home an extra year, but I did have parents who wished they did.
My summer baby, with all the delays he has, will not be going to K when he is able. It has nothing to do with wanting him to be ahead in athletics or academics (that is plain ignorant to say) but because he is delayed in many areas and will not be ready for the expectations placed on children now.
It is up to a parent when they send a child, but parents need to decide based on the child's needs NOT on their needs (ie, not wanting to pay for daycare)....
I don't think anyone is saying that a child who has identified needs or who is emotionally not ready should be forced to start kindergarten. But the fact is there are parents out there who hold their kids back for the wrong reasons. When your child is a MARCH birthday and has no identified needs, it sways the balance of the classroom when he is 6 going on 7. What kid couldn't use another year to get ready for kindergarten? I personally think you can go either way with a summer birthday. It's up to the parent.
My DD misses the cutoff in NJ by 2 days. Two freaking days. My OB offered to induce me a week early and I declined. Had I known it would be such a big issue, I would have made sure her b-day was before Oct 1 so we would at least have the option. But since most people in my town hold their kids back, she would be significantly younger than her classmates. I think it's unfair that she will have to spend an extra year in Pre-K if she is ready to go because of the poor choices other parents have made. But I can't send her into a classroom where she will be 18 months younger than many of the kids.
We are moving out of state for a job relocation, where the cut-off is December 31st, and I am thrilled that it won't be an issue there!
Please keep in mind that school is also very different than when most of us were children. What we did in second grade, is very often expected in Kindergarten now. That has to be considered.
You make a good point. I can't believe the work my kids do in school.
I am aware of parents who have held their kids back and regretted it. I know of people who started their kids early and regretted it. I think the best thing to do is start kids at the appropriate time. Then at least there are no regrets about "I should have done the other". Yes, there are kids who miss the cutoff by two days. Someone has to have that birthday.
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