Most New Yorkers are great, but what's up with all the negativity on the trains? (to live in, eat)

[Marie1249]

Originally Posted by jax78

It's not discourteous for a man to not give up his seat!!!!!!!

Marie, how often do you give up your seat to a young man who is just standing there? Maybe he looks tired, but he's not disabled, and he's not old. Do you do this often????? Somehow I highly doubt it; therefore, why should a MAN do this just because it's a WOMAN STANDING.

Whoa!!!!

I never said that it is discourteous for a man not to give up his seat. I would never say that. Read my post again. I don't know where you're getting that from.

Quite the contrary, I said "...I don't expect a man to give me a seat..." However, I appreciate it when he does.

When I mentioned discourteous behavior, I wasn't trying to say that SuperMario was discourteous for not wanting to give up his seat. He doesn't have to do that if he doesn't choose to. He wrote that no one ever honored him. So my point was that the way you treat others is how they will treat you. Respect others, and they'll respect you. Disrespect others, and they'll disrespect you.

[jax78]

Originally Posted by Marie1249

Whoa!!

I never said that it is discourteous for a man not to give up his seat. I would never say that. Read my post again. I don't know where you're getting that from.

Quite the contrary, I said "...I don't expect a man to give me a seat..." However, I appreciate it when he does.

You said this: "Courtesy and manners are just ways that we show consideration and respect to others, and attempt to make our interactions with one another pleasant.

If you treat others discourteously, you shouldn't be surprised to get the same treatment in return. It's just karma."

To me it seemed like you were saying to SuperMario or others that don't give up their seats, they are being discourteous. I got it from the sentence I bolded...

[Marie1249]

Originally Posted by jax78

You said this: "Courtesy and manners are just ways that we show consideration and respect to others, and attempt to make our interactions with one another pleasant.

If you treat others discourteously, you shouldn't be surprised to get the same treatment in return. It's just karma."

To me it seemed like you were saying to SuperMario or others that don't give up their seats, they are being discourteous. I got it from the sentence I bolded...

No, no, no. I was broadening the discussion from the courtesy of a man offering a woman a seat, to courtesy in general.

[SuperMario]

For the record, I would let a woman take a seat before me, and I also help the women who live in my building with groceries. I let them go ahead of me while I hold the door and I dont discriminate against them one bit.

I just feel that if we are all equals, that nobody should be considered rude for not giving up a seat. Maybe this was more common before, back when women were considered "weaker" and more "uncapable" than men. But women have fought hard to remove that label and have shown us that they are capable of many things. That is why I take offense when women in 2008, feel that guys should be giving up seats for them.

[jax78]

Originally Posted by Marie1249

No, no, no. I was broadening the discussion from the courtesy of a man offering a woman a seat, to courtesy in general.

I see. Sorry about that!

But you didn't answer my question: Do you ever give up your seat to young men who are standing up?

[Marie1249]

Originally Posted by SuperMario

...I take offense when women in 2008, feel that guys should be giving up seats for them.

I don't, and I don't think most able-bodied women nowadays, think that men are supposed to give up their seats for us. It's just nice when they do.

[Marie1249]

Originally Posted by jax78

I see. Sorry about that!

But you didn't answer my question: Do you ever give up your seat to young men who are standing up?

Generally, no. I only gave my seat to a young man once because he limping and using a cane.

[SkyBob]

Originally Posted by SobroGuy

Does anyone know how this "herb" nonsense started anyway? I remember hearing "he a herb" 15+ years ago....

Wow, this thread really has been prolific with the comments in a short amount of time, hasn't it?

If I'm allowed to back up to the slang discussion about herb - is anybody out there old enough to remember an old Star Trek (the one with Captain Kirk) episode where the residents of some planet are chanting "Herbert! Herbert! Herbert!" to Kirk and meant it to be an insult?

I hope I'm not the only one to remember this bit of useless information.

[Indi9]

To steer this in another direction... Tonight I was on the notorious A train, and I saw a woman get on at 59th Street and aggressively plop herself down on a skinny little seat btw. two other passengers. She pretended not to notice their discomfort. To his credit, the gentleman to her right squeezed over a bit to let her sit down, i.e. after he missed a beat and decided not to say anything to her. But I could see by the look on his face that he was annoyed with her, yet deciding to be a gentleman. As if that were not enough, she proceeded to elbow her way into grabbing some more space, enough to take off her coat. She did not care one bit about the two other passengers to her left and to her right. I see this kind of stuff on the train constantly. What do y'all think of this kind of scenario? If it had been me sitting next to Miss Queen of the A Train, I would have politely said something to her. For example, I was once on that same train and a man with a newspaper decided to let the left half of his newspaper swing into my face and practically onto my lap. I smiled, turned to him, and said, "Hey mister, I'm not a desk." He didn't know what I meant, so I pointed to the newspaper that was in my personal space, continuing to smile my famous teacher's "You are so busted, but we love you anyway" smile. He shifted the newspaper back into his own space somehow, while the other passengers who overheard the scenario laughed and looked at me as if to say, "You go girl." Crazy city.

[quelinda]

I also find that highly annoying Indie. I dont like being touched by people and their things on the train. I know it comes with the territory but I do my best to avoid it when possible, so I wouldn't exactly be the one to squeeze in. I've probably done it over the years, like I used to squeeze myself on a packed train. Now I hate when people think they have the perfect right to squeeze on (or in a seat) just cuz its the train. They forget that there's always another train coming and it is not just fine to squeeze onto a car that can fit no more people. I guess I'm what you could call a subway Mod cut: inappropriate language haha. As for the newspaper in my face, those things get physically pushed right out of the way.