U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
 
 
Old 12-16-2007, 07:33 PM
 
5 posts, read 11,417 times
Reputation: 16
Default So called Southern Hospitality is a lie and NY attitude is too!

I moved to Birmingham, Alabama in 1992 from Brooklyn, NY where I was born and raised and I can honestly tell you...the people in the south are far ruder than the people in NYC. By the way...I went to college in New Paltz and Brockport which are both located upstate NY...yes they are much more laid back. The NYC attitude thing is a perception...I can tell you that New Yorkers are just "honest" not "rude" -- most southerners are truly phoney and rude...they will not let you in when you are driving...there is tremendous road rage because they hide their feelings in your face but behind the wheel forget it! So, like I tell my husband who is from the south...the whole southern hospitality thing is just as much a myth and the NYC attitude. People are just people...there are some rude one's and some nice one's no matter where you reside.
Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-17-2007, 08:41 PM
 
Location: NY
133 posts, read 340,921 times
Reputation: 69
It's all relative. It is tremendously obvious that people from outside the NY metro region view natives as "uptight, rude, unfriendly, brash". As much as you posted that you view people from the south to rude, I would disagree with you. I am from the north and lived in the south. I like the people and the culture in the south. The real issue is you don't feel NY'ers have an attitude because you are acclimated to that environment. A person from Lodi, California can see the difference. It's all from a relative perspective.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-18-2007, 04:26 AM
 
Location: Maui
150 posts, read 519,667 times
Reputation: 71
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingler View Post
The famous New York Attitude has an historical beginning. People use to complain about the attitude of the people in New York way back in the 1600s. It has developed over time. I actually feel and see it most in the suburbs and in the outer Boroughs. Queens, Long Island, Close In New Jersey and Staten Island. I think some of it comes from the Italian background of many of the people who have lived in New York for generations.

My question still stands.
"You think some of it comes from the Italian background" - Gee that's funny I didn't realize we had that much pull - makes us kinda special don't you think.....Hey Vinny - get over here and take a look at this boloney! Ok now really -From one Native New Yorker who happens to be Italian....It seems like you are the one with the attitude and I pray you stay in VA. It's people like you who come here and give the good folks of NYC a bad rep.

Last edited by Frangi914; 12-18-2007 at 04:38 AM..
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-18-2007, 06:01 AM
 
Location: NY
133 posts, read 340,921 times
Reputation: 69
Good call Frangi. The Italian-American thing insulted me too and I'm not even Italian! Talk about a bad stereotype.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-15-2008, 11:44 AM
 
1 posts, read 1,828 times
Reputation: 14
Hey, im a Floridian (there are many New Yorkers here actually as well as southerners) considering moving to NYC & I have to say I think its a matter of experience, understanding and also in doing that... you can't be too defensive about your own culture. when a new yorker tells you something you might consider rude- think about it- dont just react rudely. many times New Yorkers just have something to say & they are going to offer you their opinion. if you disagree- tell them in a way they can understand. maybe it means joining in a loud but peaceful conversation or difference of opinion- who cares- its more normal for them to be in your face maybe. dont take it personally! Really! Honestly, I really love new yorkers but that doesn't mean there isn't an "attitude". People who say that there isn't an attitude are obviously not paying attention or are just being PC (like many people who are reactionary & defensive about their own culture). There is nothing wrong with the difference because "attitude" doesn't really imply anything bad or negative, just acknowledges theres a difference. I mean it might be a "good" attitude... so really nobody needs to get defensive here about anyone's culture. It is, though, for many people a "culture shock" to come here from many other areas in the U.S. and that should be expected actually just like if you went to europe or wherever. If you can't handle it, understand it & adapt to it you'll just end up being miserable if you have to live there... nothing really bad there in yourself really it just means you appreciate & are attached to your own ways like you are to a homey environment & maybe don't always want to be "challenged" culturally every time you walk out your door. I do appreciate both southern & new york culture & people because i want to understand & better myself in that way so I wait on my judgments until I do understand. They are different & that difference can be a good thing.

Just cuz one isn't better than the other, though, doesn't mean that each can't have their problems within that culture. I do find 'many' southerners might talk more behind your back because they don't feel the need to come up with some snappy comments in their defense every day. To a new yorker it can be considered weak, two faced, or stupid to not be able to respond in your own defense right away. In contrast, A new yorker doesn't have time for people who don't know what they're doing. A new yorker is used to the idea of good old american ingenuity & competition and they have tested this idea for a long time. In many ways the rest of the country can't always compete for that reason.

One thing I have felt though in knowing people from NY and from the new england area is that they are honest and they don't like BS. We are so used to BS in the south because you are supposed to be 'proper' and 'nice' here- what da hell does that really mean if you're not from here? it is culturally expected that we don't make judgments too quick & we go out of our way to help others at times. But many times it leads to us in the south not being very independently minded or able to even know what we 'really think' about things at times. These are of course extreme cases for some... for others in the south it is the norm.

But you know the biggest thing for me is that in NY & new england area many people can very potentially be like 'best friends' much easier than in the south... why is that? BS doesnt belong in really close friendship but in the south we dont even realize half the time how much BS we have accepted in our lives so we don't even go out of that 'safe' environment to tell people really how this or that situation makes us feel. It just ends up making me feel lonely down here looking for a true friend who will tell me how they truly feel! when someone tells us off down in the south we dont always think about it & drop our guard & say... "hey, maybe they are right about me" (NYorkers can tend to be VERY perceptive about people because they have to be!) ive had friends from up north tell me I was totally being stupid & defensive & let me tell you- they were right! no one down here would tell me that or be honest with me about that (except my wife) and if they did they would have NO good reason to back it up with (cuz i always make sure people really have a fr**king good reason to be telling me judgmental stuff like that). Some fr**king judgment about life & people can be a good thing though- hello? I have to say i really respect people who pay attention & care to tell me what they really think about what i'm doing even if its bad. it means they care if they are being honest- even though they might not say it without some sob words & tears in their eyes (oh pleeze!) because they are not going to feed you some line of BS. what are they trying to do- soften the blow? well i can take it- im not a child. If what they say is true- well we need to accept the truth & move on!

Of course there are many good observations people from both cultural groups have to offer- but i dont get what people are saying about italians & irish. I thought New York was the first to have what is known as a melting pot in the US from all the immigration back in the day? Now we have a bunch of other cultures coming in too... as well as illegals. nothing wrong with new cultures... but people are living in movie land & just think cuz they've seen the Godfather and Pacino & DeNiro movies that NY has something to do with italian culture & etc etc- how weird is that? i mean there are so many italians in California & Florida now... & then theres all the middle easterners now in NY... we need to stay up with the times!

Its all just something to learn my friend- if you don't wanna "sign up" to learn the culture you move to- well maybe you shouldn't move at all man.

Here' a story- people were always telling me like "French people are rude" or some paranoid nonsense- so what do I do? I learn about french people & culture- I do what's called "respecting" THEIR culture, language & people. guess what- I go to Paris & LOVED IT! no one was rude to me- i didnt even have to speak a lot of french but I was 'humble' and 'unassuming' and now i want to go back one day. Id say treat NY the same. I mean what ever happened to the 'give & take' thing... what is that they say about Rome? "When in Rome..." you dont need to hate your own culture- just love someone else's for a change too, my friend. people can tell man- especially New Yorkers!
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-17-2008, 02:28 PM
 
Location: Scarsdale, NY
2,775 posts, read 8,475,889 times
Reputation: 748
There is no place in this area that is close to the city but far from the attitude. No place. Unless you want to live somewhere above or in the Catskill Mountains or Albany. Maybe western Orange County, also.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-17-2008, 02:31 PM
 
Location: Scarsdale, NY
2,775 posts, read 8,475,889 times
Reputation: 748
Quote:
Originally Posted by luvnnyc View Post
I moved to Birmingham, Alabama in 1992 from Brooklyn, NY where I was born and raised and I can honestly tell you...the people in the south are far ruder than the people in NYC. By the way...I went to college in New Paltz and Brockport which are both located upstate NY...yes they are much more laid back. The NYC attitude thing is a perception...I can tell you that New Yorkers are just "honest" not "rude" -- most southerners are truly phoney and rude...they will not let you in when you are driving...there is tremendous road rage because they hide their feelings in your face but behind the wheel forget it! So, like I tell my husband who is from the south...the whole southern hospitality thing is just as much a myth and the NYC attitude. People are just people...there are some rude one's and some nice one's no matter where you reside.
Not sure about Alabama's attitude. But New Yorkers will tell you like it is.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-18-2008, 08:44 PM
 
75 posts, read 231,586 times
Reputation: 22
Far enough away where people are not constantly rushing to make enough money to pay the rent/mortgage.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-18-2008, 09:19 PM
 
71 posts, read 220,918 times
Reputation: 113
Default See, I don't even notice it anymore

I wonder what the heck people are talking about.... then I go take my daughter to school up in Vermont, and I come home and I'm like, ohh, yeah. Bastards.

I tell you, its the foreigners in this town that are the worst. And the ultra snobby rich. The rest of the people are ok.

Nowadays, foreigners come into the city already having animosity toward the white people, the locals, the Americans. Yes, it sucks. But I barely notice anymore. Except that no one ever says thank you. Well, at least not the Koreans or the Indians.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-20-2008, 08:15 PM
 
Location: Ulster County
10 posts, read 26,785 times
Reputation: 12
I'm a native Brooklynite from the 50's & 60's- and grateful I spent my crazy,scary & completely wild childhood in a place where I learned more from the street than in its schools. My parents worked & we were on the streets till dinner, but part of the "Attitude" included little old ladies who kept an eye on you, & a growing sense of who you were & where you fit within the neighborhood. (like most places)
I left before I was 20, & eventually moved to beautiful "upstate" NY in the Hudson Valley. I love that the city is close enough to get to, but guess what?- the city has started to migrate up here. It's not the Attitude I mind so much (though there are some jerks who'd like to force their lifestyles down our throats) - but the fact that our rural lifestyle is becoming adversely affected by becoming too crowded.
I'm comfortable in city & country, & prefer to live in the woods. We're looking to migrate, too, & soon we'll be headed to the North Country. I'll bet they feel the same rumors of impending change. Hope I won't be too much a part of it.
Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top