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I had to finally break away from my friendship of over 20 years to a guy I knew back in 1st grade. A combination of life changes, divorce, alchohol abuse, suicide attemps, DUI's, having 4 kids, lying, cheating, running away over the past few years resulted that I finally had to let him go, I couldn't help him anymore.
Took me months to finally accept that there was nothing more I could do to help him, never been so lonely in my life other then breaking up with my ex after 5 years a few months prior. This past few years have not been kind to me relationship or friendship wise, cannot wait to move outa this home town and state.....
One friend of 30 years was just incredibly selfish and down right evil. My husband despised her from day one and was happy when I finally saw the light and sent her on her toxic way. Another friend and her husband were alcoholics. I told her this would end our friendship because I was raised by alcoholics and couldn't live that way as an adult. We traveled together and spent holidays together. The alcohol took over and so did the dysfunction. I walked away from the friendship and didn't attend her mothers funeral as well. She died a couple of years later at 59 from esophageal cancer. She was a millionaire when she died but one of the poorest people I've ever met. I can honestly say that I'm much happier with out them in my life. It just made room for some really wonderful people I call real friends.
I had to break a friendship with a lady from work because it seemed like everytime we went somewhere she would smile and flirt with men (men she did not know ) in the bar and then she would do like dirty dancing with them and then she would go home to her husband and I was like , okay this is not normal and I broke that off real quick before someone thought I did the same thing .
I had a friend who called to "dump" on me, her old problems w/ her parents (she was in her later 50's at the time)and like 10 o'clock at night. Everyone has issues and you have to take responsibility for your own. Or, it becomes dysfunctional. No thanks. Get a therapist!
Liars, um no thanks.
People who are genuinely unkind or heartless types (even though on the surface they appear "normal").Angry all the time types.
The "victim" or "woe is me," "poor me" mentality type--adios. Energy drain!
Last edited by Nanny Goat; 03-02-2013 at 07:13 AM..
One friend of 30 years was just incredibly selfish and down right evil. My husband despised her from day one and was happy when I finally saw the light and sent her on her toxic way. Another friend and her husband were alcoholics. I told her this would end our friendship because I was raised by alcoholics and couldn't live that way as an adult. We traveled together and spent holidays together. The alcohol took over and so did the dysfunction. I walked away from the friendship and didn't attend her mothers funeral as well. She died a couple of years later at 59 from esophageal cancer. She was a millionaire when she died but one of the poorest people I've ever met. I can honestly say that I'm much happier with out them in my life. It just made room for some really wonderful people I call real friends.
Sorry for your experience, but glad you finally broke free and weeded these toxic people from your life. Been there, done that.
Bigots, racists, narcissists, users, liars, manipulators, know-it-alls, egotists, one-way friends with no reciprocity, whiners, negative mindset, gossipers, animal haters, show offs, snobs, closed minded.
Don't like my dogs? Bye!
Criricize my SO? Bye!
I've divorced 3 ''friends'' in my life. One was not there for me in an extreme time of need. Another one used me over and over. Another one got a snooty complex when she hooked up with a partner who turned her into a ''pc snob''.
I had a similar experience back in the 1970's and have often since wondered if perhaps I was too judgmental. I didn't worry at all about folks thinking I would do the same thing. Mostly it bothered me because I knew what a decent guy her husband was.
She ended up leaving him for another guy who also left his wife. The whole thing left me confused about the rights-and-wrongs of it all, if their shifting loyalties justified my judgmental attitude. If I could do it all over again, I think I'd try to be a better friend to her. No easy answers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by phonelady61
I had to break a friendship with a lady from work because it seemed like everytime we went somewhere she would smile and flirt with men (men she did not know ) in the bar and then she would do like dirty dancing with them and then she would go home to her husband and I was like , okay this is not normal and I broke that off real quick before someone thought I did the same thing .
I normally don't give up on people too easily but there are three big reasons why I've quit hanging out with some people.
1) Barflies (read alcoholics). I was in a group that wanted to do nothing but drink until the cows come home. They did nothing else but sit in the bar (or "go dancing" which is still going to the bar) and get drunk and obnoxious. Finally I just got sick of it. My pocketbook likes this decision.
2) Gamers. I can't stand people who do nothing but play video games (especially those in the 25 to 35 range). I especially can't stand it if you can't hold a conversation when I'm over. Why did you invite me over in the first place?
3) People who I have to call all the time and don't call me. Phones go both ways.
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No easy answers.
